Sadhana makes me happy and contented

Mar 16 eve

Did Shoonya but couldn't go in deep. So took longer.

What makes me happy??

How do I want to spend my time?

Today meeting over shot cos there were some critical matters that I need to take charge. My second in command tried but not successful. I got to take back the helm. Did give him my feedback and found out he was taking charge from behind but didn't take charge of meeting. (Found out that he is North Node in Leo ..no wonder..I am here to guide him to be leader)

Came back late, so no Sannidhi pooja today.

Sang guru pooja.  Was crying to Sadhguru, thanking to Devi and all the masters. Sorry that I couldn't do Sannidhi pooja today.
Did Shoonya, went in deep. Followed by breathing meditation. Got into it. Just being aware of my body. Feels good. All cleansed up. Feeling contented.

L said I can take over the boss role. I know I can't. That's even more difficult than taking the position in my former company. She said I can do it. I told her can doesn't mean I like it.

I told her I only know that sadhana very important to me and it makes me happy.

I now know what makes me burden. Me controlling myself. I used to think capability means responsibility; responsibility means suffering.
Knowing that I m INFJ in hiding. That's why I get tired doing the lead role.

Suddenly tot of North node in Taurus, past history of always seeking new challenges. No more.

This life I m meant to be at ease. I will stay put.