I can ask for Silence

Sept 3

Woke up 4.22 am and finished practices by 7.20 am. I think may have doze a little during Shavasana and I took a longer Breathing meditation cos it was lovely.
Asanas was fine. I can touch my forehead to my knees in Two legs sitting asanas but not comfortably. The one leg was good.
Shakti was great. Now liking the Kapala Bhakti with its long break after every inhalation. Final breathing was fine too. Shambavi was good. Towards the end, head was shaking non stop. Head shakes also during aum chanting. Just contented silence. I sat for quite longer than usual.
There were some tots. But somehow I know the tots are not real and I can brush them off. When the tots can't dissolve I just ask for Silence. To my amazement, the mind gives me Silence. This happens a few times.
Father, another growth. Let me focus on deepening my Silence.

As I was driving to work, I saw the loveliness of the trees and grass on the road. Some of them I never noticed before until recently. I thanked them for being my sign post for energy level.

The mind can truly give us what we want. The mind can gives us No Tots if we request. I will consciously requests  for Silence.
Just as I semi retired my digestive system; the same I semi retired my mind. It has been working non stop. It is time for my mind to rest. To work only when needed.

Father, this week Osho tarot card is really true - Rebirth
1. Issue
Rebirth
Finally the child emerges, neither acquiescent nor rebellious, but innocent and spontaneous and true to his own being.

I had a good chat with C and she was briefing me on her children. As she was talking I know that I am glad that i can't have children now cos i truly dont want. I prefer to use my energy to create myself rather than to create and mould children. I want to spend time knowing myself, loving myself, growing myself, nurturing myself, healing myself. Give myself whatever needed.

The Twelve Insight
Eating is one of the most obsessive things we do in the modern world. If ur particular feel-good distraction is food, it is by definition has to taste really good, because otherwise it won't give u that pacified and satisfied feeling that comes when glutamate receptors in the brain are activated. The food makers find a way to artificially do that for u with glutamate.
The big problem is not just the health impact. It's how it affects ur consciousness. U can't keep ur energy up and stay alert spirituality if u are drugged. Keeping our energy up is important to developing influence.
Food is the first level of energy we allow into our consciousness, so it's basic to integrating a higher mastery over life.
And the ironic thing is that real food, the kind that's organic and pure and freshly picked, stimulates the same receptors in the brain without bringing us down.

Soul
Exactly as Sadhguru says. The only blessing I had was I never like junk food or processed food. And now I don't take meat. As for organic and etc. not yet. Meanwhile I m comfortable. Just want to semi retired my digestive system: no longer want to overwork it. I m glad food no longer has emotional quotient for me.

Father, food is truly integral in my quest for Self Mastery. It was only after I drop meat in late March that my experiences have deepened. Father, my values were not strong. But I m now reaffirming my path of Self Mastery.