Dec 12 aft 2
The power of empathy
Criticisms can be well deserved, and when they hit the mark, they have much to teach us. But crucial comments can also be undeserved, unnecessary and manipulative. Sifting the wheat from the chaff is an important, challenging task.
If you find urself are often critical of others, use ur empathy to discover the source of ur insecurities. In my experience people who do a lot of criticising are often insecure; feeling unsteady and unprotected, they tend to lash out at others.
A tendency to be critical of self and/or others
Soul
That's how I recently see my brother. I saw that he needs to put me down unnecessarily just to bring himself up.
Mmm, wonder if P is like that too. She is definitely critical of many people.
As for me I m sensitive towards criticism cos my love language is word affirmation.
Words of Affirmation
Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important— hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten. You thrive on hearing kind and encouraging words that build you up.
The power of empathy
When u are convinced that a person is trustworthy and authentically cares about u, enter the rship wholeheartedly
Soul
No wonder I always get hurt by P. I think affirmation words definitely not her love language cos she said tend to be direct with people close to her.
Wonder how she show love. Services, perhaps.
Mmm or maybe gifts. She truly show up when I went to Kailash. Gave me good advice and loaning me stuff for the trips. That's was loving of her.
Mmmm, guess we both at different end of love language.
No wonder while we both do respect each other but somehow tend to have conflict. Me feeling hurt and she tot I m drama.
The power of empathy
The ability to be alone is necessary condition for acceptance of ourselves and others. Not until we learn how to be comfortable alone with ourselves can we be comfortable with others.
Erich Fromm
If I am attached to another person because I cannot stand on my own feet, he or she may be a lifesaver, but the rship is not of love. Paradoxically, the ability to be alone is the condition for the ability to love.
Dec 19
Just received a message from P.
I now realised that she never see me as a friend. I can now let go of her too from my circle of close friends.
No more seeking her approval. No more seeking her validation.
No more hoping that she be 'nice'.
No more hoping that she will 'share' her experiences.
No more holding on to her for linkage to local Isha.
Now that I have let go of Local Isha..I can let go of her too.
No more...
Feel relieved, similar to the relief I felt when I let go of S.
Thursday, December 18, 2014
Expressing myself in the corporate world
Dec 12 aft 1
Coming out, showing up, giving room to be myself
The power of empathy
The individual increasingly comes to feel that this locus of evaluation lies within himself. Less and less does he look to others for approval or disapproval; for standards to live by; for decisions and choices. He recognised that it rests within himself to choose; that the only question which matters is, "Am I living in a way which is deeply satisfying to me, and which truly expresses me?
This I think is perhaps the most important question for the creative individual.
Soul
Alas I am here.
Jsut now when I saw the team going for the pooja at the studio. I wanted to join..wish I was there.
This time I can be vulnerable and tell them.
I am truly coming out.
Coming out on the Isha in me; coming out on the sensitivity in me, coming out on the vulnerability in me.
Finally, the veil of privacy is lifted.
INFJ careers
Dec 12 aft
https://www.udemy.com/blog/infj-careers/
If, like INFJs, we look at the bigger picture, we can start to make accurate predictions about what types of careers they are best suited for.
INFJs are thoughtful, interested in deep meanings and other people’s feelings, driven to improve problems around them, excellent at interacting with people on an emotional level, natural – though hesitant – leaders, eager to learn and, generally, optimistic.
Service Oriented Careers
INFJs tend to be service oriented. They like helping other people (always a good thing). Many INFJs turn out to be excellent teachers, instructors, psychologists and health care professionals.
All of these careers allow INFJs to devote themselves for a sustained period of time to helping people. INFJs do not like moving around, either in careers or with the people they work with. So you can see how being a teacher, psychologist or health care professional would allow them to work with the same people for longer periods of time than, say, being a lawyer (although they can be very successful in law, too).
Where They Are Happiest: In service oriented professions, INFJs are able to start helping people from the beginning; with an illness, with a grade level at school, with mental issues, etc. In this way they are able to see these relationships through to the end. With teaching, this tends to almost always end well and, thus, is why INFJs are perhaps happiest in these roles.
Where They Are Most Satisfied: With illnesses and mental diseases, however, the benefits are different; because INFJs feel a deep desire to help people in the most profound way possible, they are perhaps more professionally satisfied in health care fields, but these careers take a more significant toll on them. They can not help but become emotionally attached to the people they treat; when these people die or when the help can only ease the pain but not cure it, INFJs suffer emotionally.
Soul
Health care not my thing.
Its true, I can be emotionally attached and with my sensitivity, I get drained.
Artistic Careers
Just like with service oriented careers, artistic careers allow INFJs to get more out of their work than just “having a job to do.” The deep thinking of INFJs causes them to need a creative outlet. Deep thoughts and strong emotions commonly translate to the arts.
Variety: As all INFJs are unique, there is no one artistic career they are best suited for. They can be writers, actors, designers, photographers, musicians, painters, architects, entrepreneurs, etc. (check out this great course on developing an entrepreneurial personality). These careers support the idea of holding onto your deepest convictions, as well as sticking with the same thing for the duration of your professional life. A musician, for example, can play the same instrument(s) indefinitely.
Two-For-One: Many INFJ artists also teach. This allows them to have their cake and eat it, too. They can be somewhat selfish and introverted with their personal ambitions, but they also feed their desire to help people by sharing this important part of their lives with their students. Many INFJs want to feel that their role is meaningful; thus, they are convinced (rightfully so, in my opinion) that the benefits of art are nearly infinite.
https://www.udemy.com/blog/infj-careers/
If, like INFJs, we look at the bigger picture, we can start to make accurate predictions about what types of careers they are best suited for.
INFJs are thoughtful, interested in deep meanings and other people’s feelings, driven to improve problems around them, excellent at interacting with people on an emotional level, natural – though hesitant – leaders, eager to learn and, generally, optimistic.
Service Oriented Careers
INFJs tend to be service oriented. They like helping other people (always a good thing). Many INFJs turn out to be excellent teachers, instructors, psychologists and health care professionals.
All of these careers allow INFJs to devote themselves for a sustained period of time to helping people. INFJs do not like moving around, either in careers or with the people they work with. So you can see how being a teacher, psychologist or health care professional would allow them to work with the same people for longer periods of time than, say, being a lawyer (although they can be very successful in law, too).
Where They Are Happiest: In service oriented professions, INFJs are able to start helping people from the beginning; with an illness, with a grade level at school, with mental issues, etc. In this way they are able to see these relationships through to the end. With teaching, this tends to almost always end well and, thus, is why INFJs are perhaps happiest in these roles.
Where They Are Most Satisfied: With illnesses and mental diseases, however, the benefits are different; because INFJs feel a deep desire to help people in the most profound way possible, they are perhaps more professionally satisfied in health care fields, but these careers take a more significant toll on them. They can not help but become emotionally attached to the people they treat; when these people die or when the help can only ease the pain but not cure it, INFJs suffer emotionally.
Soul
Health care not my thing.
Its true, I can be emotionally attached and with my sensitivity, I get drained.
Artistic Careers
Just like with service oriented careers, artistic careers allow INFJs to get more out of their work than just “having a job to do.” The deep thinking of INFJs causes them to need a creative outlet. Deep thoughts and strong emotions commonly translate to the arts.
Variety: As all INFJs are unique, there is no one artistic career they are best suited for. They can be writers, actors, designers, photographers, musicians, painters, architects, entrepreneurs, etc. (check out this great course on developing an entrepreneurial personality). These careers support the idea of holding onto your deepest convictions, as well as sticking with the same thing for the duration of your professional life. A musician, for example, can play the same instrument(s) indefinitely.
Two-For-One: Many INFJ artists also teach. This allows them to have their cake and eat it, too. They can be somewhat selfish and introverted with their personal ambitions, but they also feed their desire to help people by sharing this important part of their lives with their students. Many INFJs want to feel that their role is meaningful; thus, they are convinced (rightfully so, in my opinion) that the benefits of art are nearly infinite.
61 point meditation
Dec 12
body woke up fresh before 6.30 am. I dozed bit, feeling glad that I am blessed not to have to work today.
Sang guru pooja followed by cat stretch, getting stronger.
Sat a bit in meditation mode.
Then start my yogaasanas. I am now holding each posture to 20 times of slightly deep breathing. Also did the butterfly and baby rock preparation for the sit down body lift. Getting better.
During the 61 point Shukti meditation, immediately can feel my joints opening up. Can feel my Vishudi opening up and tear fall and then later my right shoulder joints.
I am now in love with 61 point, can literally feel the points opening up.
Surya Kriya was very good, body truly flexible after the yogaasanas.
Breathing meditation is fine too.
Shakti is quite good, singing towards the end.
Shambavi good too. After the butterfly, I can feel myself going into a meditative zone during baby rock. Truly something.
Father, Sadhguru truly works. I didn't realise how effective was the preparatory steps but now i know. Thanks to hata teacher who corrected my butterfly.
My Shambavi is now deepened.
My phelgm has stopped this few days.
Angamardhana seems to help in that too.
body woke up fresh before 6.30 am. I dozed bit, feeling glad that I am blessed not to have to work today.
Sang guru pooja followed by cat stretch, getting stronger.
Sat a bit in meditation mode.
Then start my yogaasanas. I am now holding each posture to 20 times of slightly deep breathing. Also did the butterfly and baby rock preparation for the sit down body lift. Getting better.
During the 61 point Shukti meditation, immediately can feel my joints opening up. Can feel my Vishudi opening up and tear fall and then later my right shoulder joints.
I am now in love with 61 point, can literally feel the points opening up.
Surya Kriya was very good, body truly flexible after the yogaasanas.
Breathing meditation is fine too.
Shakti is quite good, singing towards the end.
Shambavi good too. After the butterfly, I can feel myself going into a meditative zone during baby rock. Truly something.
Father, Sadhguru truly works. I didn't realise how effective was the preparatory steps but now i know. Thanks to hata teacher who corrected my butterfly.
My Shambavi is now deepened.
My phelgm has stopped this few days.
Angamardhana seems to help in that too.
Defensiveness lead to self sabotage
Dec 11 eve
Today 2 counseling session with my team.
First one was similar to the one on being sensitive and I got it sorted out.
The second one was a surprise.
I had another session with my second in command as I received negative feedback on him from my boss. When I told him the feedback, he said he already knew that there be negative feedback when he sent the mail but he doesn’t care. He said he is frustrated that others can’t ignore deadline whereas he has to comply. He also said that he felt he is being ‘set up’ by the said colleague, J as he email-looped the bosses.
I was surprised as his defensiveness and shocked at his rationale for his response. I asked him why did he send out the ‘wrong mail’ when he knows the outcome will be ‘bad’. He said that he feel he has done his best to provide support and if the team is not appreciative, he doesn’t care. I said his reaction is now similar with his staff that he complained about of being defensive and not open to change. He said he agreed but at least he didn’t complain or voiced his frustration like his staff and instead he would just resign once he has reached his limit. He said he knows he a good cake and so he need not be bothered about the frosting. I told him that approach is his downfall.
Alas I now know how and where I can support him.
Today 2 counseling session with my team.
First one was similar to the one on being sensitive and I got it sorted out.
The second one was a surprise.
I had another session with my second in command as I received negative feedback on him from my boss. When I told him the feedback, he said he already knew that there be negative feedback when he sent the mail but he doesn’t care. He said he is frustrated that others can’t ignore deadline whereas he has to comply. He also said that he felt he is being ‘set up’ by the said colleague, J as he email-looped the bosses.
I was surprised as his defensiveness and shocked at his rationale for his response. I asked him why did he send out the ‘wrong mail’ when he knows the outcome will be ‘bad’. He said that he feel he has done his best to provide support and if the team is not appreciative, he doesn’t care. I said his reaction is now similar with his staff that he complained about of being defensive and not open to change. He said he agreed but at least he didn’t complain or voiced his frustration like his staff and instead he would just resign once he has reached his limit. He said he knows he a good cake and so he need not be bothered about the frosting. I told him that approach is his downfall.
Alas I now know how and where I can support him.
Alternative view of criticism
Dec 10
Not sure why but yesterday evening I cried when I did guru pooja.
Today had to go to office unexpectedly. Put my alarm at 5 am. Body was fine but just feel lazy cos normally rest day. In the end decided to sleep further to 6 am.
Woke up before alarm at 5.55 am.
Did Bhuta Shuddi followed by cat stretch.
Did one cycle of Surya Kriya, it was good. I can now know whether my feel is in alignment or not.
Shakti was good as Kapala Bhakti's breathing have improved. Was singing and dancing towards the end.
Shambavi was good. Wish I can sit longer in silent contentment.
Feeling blessed that I have the option to work half day today and tomorrow second half day. Will do asanas tomorrow.
Afternoon
A feeling of contentment is now with me. A sense of grounding.
It has started since the day I stopped doing plough back after Practices.
The power of empathy
The acceptance of each fluctuating aspect of the other person make it for him a rship of warmth and safety, and safety of being liked and prized as a person seems a highly important element in a helping rship.
1. We accept ourselves with all our contradictions and complications.
2. Self acceptance leads to the second stage, in which we learn to accept others with all their contradictions and complications.
3. We accept the inevitable contradictions and complications that arise in every human rship when two complicated, contradictory people meet.
Scenario
Glenn, a concert pianist told me that he could not accept making one mistake when he went on tour. With empathy guiding the way, we talked about his father who was always putting down other people (most notably his son) in the ill-fated attempt to elevate himself.
When Glenn accepted his father as "not okay" (imperfect, critical and insecure), he could admit that he was also "not okay". Viewing his insecurities as somehow normal and an everyday part of growing up with an excessively critical, insecure father, he could accept himself as perfectly human, which really meant that he was "not okay" but that was okay.
Perhaps the deepest level of acceptance we discover in life is the wholehearted embracing of both the joy and the suffering that inevitably arise in close rships.
Soul
That's how I just saw my brother. He used to put me down so much when I was a child.
Just that day he told me how I should approach the flow of food; which I follow. To my surprise he needed to inform others how good he was, how I followed him. I told him that "little thing" also he need to get credit to feel proud.
Not sure why but yesterday evening I cried when I did guru pooja.
Today had to go to office unexpectedly. Put my alarm at 5 am. Body was fine but just feel lazy cos normally rest day. In the end decided to sleep further to 6 am.
Woke up before alarm at 5.55 am.
Did Bhuta Shuddi followed by cat stretch.
Did one cycle of Surya Kriya, it was good. I can now know whether my feel is in alignment or not.
Shakti was good as Kapala Bhakti's breathing have improved. Was singing and dancing towards the end.
Shambavi was good. Wish I can sit longer in silent contentment.
Feeling blessed that I have the option to work half day today and tomorrow second half day. Will do asanas tomorrow.
Afternoon
A feeling of contentment is now with me. A sense of grounding.
It has started since the day I stopped doing plough back after Practices.
The power of empathy
The acceptance of each fluctuating aspect of the other person make it for him a rship of warmth and safety, and safety of being liked and prized as a person seems a highly important element in a helping rship.
1. We accept ourselves with all our contradictions and complications.
2. Self acceptance leads to the second stage, in which we learn to accept others with all their contradictions and complications.
3. We accept the inevitable contradictions and complications that arise in every human rship when two complicated, contradictory people meet.
Scenario
Glenn, a concert pianist told me that he could not accept making one mistake when he went on tour. With empathy guiding the way, we talked about his father who was always putting down other people (most notably his son) in the ill-fated attempt to elevate himself.
When Glenn accepted his father as "not okay" (imperfect, critical and insecure), he could admit that he was also "not okay". Viewing his insecurities as somehow normal and an everyday part of growing up with an excessively critical, insecure father, he could accept himself as perfectly human, which really meant that he was "not okay" but that was okay.
Perhaps the deepest level of acceptance we discover in life is the wholehearted embracing of both the joy and the suffering that inevitably arise in close rships.
Soul
That's how I just saw my brother. He used to put me down so much when I was a child.
Just that day he told me how I should approach the flow of food; which I follow. To my surprise he needed to inform others how good he was, how I followed him. I told him that "little thing" also he need to get credit to feel proud.
Going inward gives fulfillment
Dec 9 eve
The secrets of yoga
When u are no longer bridged with the world, suddenly u start falling in.
And when u go on falling in and in and in, there comes the last point beyond which there is no go, the Kaivalya: u have become alone.
U don't need the constant effort of filling urself with something or the other.
Now u are in tune with ur emptiness and because of ur tuning in with the emptiness, the very emptiness has become a fullness, an infinity, a fulfillment, a fruition of being.
Soul
I like this.
I still hanker for my partner.
Fluctuating tots still arise, albeit much lesser since the arrival of Sannidhi
The secrets of yoga
When u are no longer bridged with the world, suddenly u start falling in.
And when u go on falling in and in and in, there comes the last point beyond which there is no go, the Kaivalya: u have become alone.
U don't need the constant effort of filling urself with something or the other.
Now u are in tune with ur emptiness and because of ur tuning in with the emptiness, the very emptiness has become a fullness, an infinity, a fulfillment, a fruition of being.
Soul
I like this.
I still hanker for my partner.
Fluctuating tots still arise, albeit much lesser since the arrival of Sannidhi
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