Procastinate in my Passion

Dec 27
Father, yday after d Insight, was too energetic. Slept abt 3.30 am. Again, a dream. I was driving in d car park to go for a company party. This time I seem to know d place. When I reach there to look for GM. I saw old classmates from secondary schools n people from school instead. Then again looking for car in d parking lot.

Anyway, woke up at d alarm. Of cos, ego got every reason not to wake up for mornin walk. Fully justified. But a tot came, even if don't do exercise, hav to do meditation. Besides this evenin got weddin dinner, so best choice is d walk in d path. Woke up n went for d walk. Now back n m feelin good.

This month loads of outflow. Anyway, at least this mth I hav extra money and hence dont have to withdraw from FD. Overall m fine. Don
Tot of doin reno in my room but mom has loads of ideas. Front part alone is 15k n she wan to change cabinet which will cost abt 10k n if that is changed, might as well do the wall that is another 5k. Aiyah, wait until I hav achieve success.

Bhagavad Gita
Drona (Habit tendency) is the preceptor for both the good and bad. Until the yogi is firmly establised in Self-realisation, the Drona in him is a miscellany of both good and evil samskaras.
However, Habits go on repeating their same old pattern, often ignoring a desire's new command.
In meditation, the return of the consciousness to the kingdom of the soul requires the yogi to pass from awareness of flesh to awareness of astral existence.
The astral vibration are not heard until the yogi's consciousness reaches the inner astral plane.
Great determination of will is required to win this first inner psychological battle to keep the concentration steady n interiorised. The devotee whose consciousness becomes attuned to these astral sounds finds himself gradually ascending to higher states of realisation.

Soul - is says here to be absolutely still. Now not so sure if my auto movement is d result of body or astral. But d movement has led me higher n higher. My head shaking brings me into fast track union or loosen all flying tots. Also, my resistance is almost always before meditation. Once I start, almost always I am in union. So, I will take d vibration I heard as astral. Most of d times, my movement only enhance d sounds.

Bhagavad Gita
During meditation, the devotee will find himself straighten his spine; by holding his neck straigh, pulling his shoulders back and pushing his chest forward and drawing his abdomen in - bow of meditation, well strung and ready for battle wit d senses. The devotee then directs the nerve-force flow inwardly through the spine into the abode of Spirit in the cerebrum.

Soul - yeap, at d height, I find my body doing that n there is absolute silence.
Jus now I shared wit aunt n mom that m writing a book on related God's matter. Aunt said that I jus started this journey n most people wil have 20 years or so. Also writing book is so stressful. At first I tot she was referrin to the sense of failure if book is not saleable. Then in d end, she said she was referring to the amount of brain power to be used n it be energy draining. I told her my strength is my brain n my weakness is in physical. She said hers is opposite. Mom said she is against me quitting job to do this. I retorted n said what right does she has.
Anyway, m not writing on Yoga Kriya, m writing abt Self-Help matters. It is true I hav not reached d apex but I know d approach n experience of motivation/resistance leading towards apex.

Bhagavad Gita
Good and bad ideas are different forms or different dreams of consciousness. It is better to dream beautiful phase of consciousness than to have nightmare.
Consciousness is imaginative, sensitive and pliable; it can think and dream itself into any state.
When d mind impartially weighs all the faculties of the soul against sense pleasures, it is called "Sanjaya" or the introspective state. When the consciousness of the devotee is ever ready to meditate, scorning sleep, it has reached the "Arjuna-Gudakesha" state of fiery spiritual determination and self-control.

The "Arjuna-Partha" state is that consciousness in which the devotee feels symphathetic toward the mental sense tendencies and needs to be reminded that he is the son of Pritha who represents the power of dispassion/renunciation; and that he should therefore act accordingly and not give in to instincts born of nature.

The devotee who understands the route he must travel will never feel unsure of dismayed at its inevitable opposition.
The true devotee gives not only trust to God; he worships Him through understanding and wisdom. Blind piety is not unacceptable to the Supreme being, but it is a low form of spiritual-mindedness.
Man, blessed with the divine gift of intelligence, of reason and free choice, should worship his Creator in truth and in understanding.
When devotee passes through the initial state of meditation and arrives at the middle state, he obtains this keen vision of his dear psychological relatives of good and bad tendencies gathered together on the battlefield of consciousness, ready to destroy one another.

The secret of the ages.
To focus on one thing and do that thing well. Better far to do one thing pre-eminently well than to dabble in forty.
It is only the man who first consults wisely, then resolves firmly, and then executes his purpose with inflexible perseverance, undismayed by those petty difficulties that daunt a weaker spirit, that can advance to eminence in any line.
Every man wants to get out of the rut, to grow, to develop into something better. (This is d line to get me a Weekly column)
Make them real, live and interesting. Don't merely dream - but CREATE!
The use ur imagination to make that CREATION of advantage to mankind - and, incidentally yourself.
　
Soul - Father, part of me wonder why I stil hav not start on my Passion. Is there anything I should be concerned with?? Then I realised this is me, at the start of every new job or project. I won't do or think abt it until n when I m doing it. I don't hav fear abt it, I don't wonder/ponder abt it. When its time, I will do it. Its jus like my spiritual journey. So, no worries lah, that's jus my mode whenever I start something new.