Rhematoid Arthritis - could it be the angry part of me

June 30

Woke up around 5 am. Slept back cos knee pain can't do Surya Kriya and Shakti Chalana Kriya. Woke up at 6.30 am instead. Just did Bhuta Shuddi followed by Shambavi. When I woke up at 6.30 am my pain has reduced much. Thanks to both steroids and Sannidhi energy. So great to be back.

From Facebook.
May you find the angry part of you, the part that feels violated and betrayed, the part that should have been nurtured, but instead was harmed, the part that is making others wrong, the part that is frustrated because you know the truth and nobody else is listening to you, the part that just can’t stand the discomfort of being with the truth when others don’t yet have it . Offer that part of you comfort, loving care, and compassion. Promise to take care of that part of you. Make a commitment to always listen to this angry part. Promise to never sell out that part of you. Never. Ever. Reassure the angry part. Mother the angry part. Soothe the angry part.
The angry part thinks it won’t get heard unless it screams, defends, and makes everyone else wrong. It doesn’t realize it’s actually sabotaging your efforts to effect change, because you can’t change something when you make it wrong. The angry part doesn’t trust that it will be heard if it shows up in love.

Soul
Wonder if that's my defence mechanism.
On my trip last weekend. I would said average. But then if I m truly honest then I said it's like a family weekend. The husband left only on Sunday evening. From Saturday onward makes all the plans and I had to join since my friend can't say no. She can't say no but said its because she doesn't want to fight. Again this time saying she wants to leave but something happen with her son and other family members. I told her that I disbelieve her cos she can't even ask him to take taxi to airport.
And I did said she spoiled her husband. Same goes for the son. Nice boy but lacked independence.

Watching Sadhguru video on successful sadhana. https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=share&v=SGsEW1mbwGA
Sadhguru said its not we are like that because of family; its because we are like that, that our family becomes like that.
I agree.
Then I wonder about mine. Well, all these years they were the one supporting me. I was sort of the baby. Now I plan to rent out the room, all seems to be against. Let's see.