Sannidhi pooja like Samyama

May 25 eve

My mind went on negative mode. Thinking of negative outcome over my msg to L. I can see its negative tots. I disbelieve it. I can see how my Saturn in Seven of Clubs being activated. I can see how I always tot I be rejected.

I can't stop the tots from churning but I can opt to go beneath the tots and focused on the inner silence. After awhile the churning stops.

Did Sannidhi Pooja. It was explosive. Immediately when the Pooja song started the energy exploded as if I m in Samyama. My whole body contrite as if something is coming out. All the different types of animal voices. It was so much that I cried to Sadhguru a couple of time as the body seems expelling something. 
Brahmananda chanting; different human voices came. But not so much.

Devi chanting only once. After chanting I start to sing she dance. Then I lie down on Devi posture. Still dancing.