I am not running away

Sept 24

Father, leaving him is so easy. Alas, now I know why I am his life coach to teach him about self awareness. And I know why he is my life coach about soul mate. He has taught me things not to do.

Father, he doesn't respond to my initiation and would go into hiding in frenzied activities. And I don't have the right to ask for response as he already made our rship clear.

All my insight was correct. We r both wounded human who put on amours, our defense mechanism are different.

I think the only way out is for me to just be his life coach. Remove the illusion that we could ever be together. Then I can stay objective to heal him for himself and his future partner.

I am not sure ... could I be unnecessarily involved in other people business.

Just finished my practice and msg
1. I am not running
2. I love him
3. He is my business.

Evening
I msg him in the morning but no reply till now. Of course, m feeling bit peeved and drama is being created.
I tot of calling him up to ask if he wants to end it, he should tell me. But then I tot of Sl, always "angry" whenever couldn't get the love she wants.
So, I am taking a step back.

Father, I spend my family a lovely expensive lunch. It was a good gathering.

Sept 24 Eve
Father, what a surprising evening. When I didn't receive a response on my msg, I had some negative tots. The old me would have wallow in it.
For a moment, the old me said what if I called and he didn't respond, that will make me feel worse. The new me just decide to call him and I did.

He was sleeping and I woke him up. He called me back. We had a good chat and he finally told me what is bothering him. He asked for my input and help. A first time for him. When he was sharing his ordeal, suddenly I was moved to tears and I said silently that I love him a few times. I want to send my love energy to him. I want him to know he is not alone.