Osho
A disciple knows no relationship with the master, he is simply one with the master.
A master is a door, a master is a gesture of the unknown, a master is a beckoning light - but not a person at all. An open door, an invitation to the divine - but not a person at all.
U r not supposed to surrender to the master. If u do it, it will be conditioning and u will miss the whole point.
Surrender happens; u find urself surrendering to the presence rather than person.
Soul - yeap. That's how I approach Sadhguru. He is a presence, a possibility and since I don't know him, there is not even a rship. I open myself up to his techniques. And when I surrender, I know I surrender to the possibility of techniques (me opening up to Universe) rather than surrender to Sadhguru. That's why I don't have the need to see him in person.
Osho
Surrender is happening. The disciple simply finds he is melting, he is disappearing. His boundaries are getting blurred, he is becoming cloudy - malleable. Great courage is needed.
Surrender cannot be done. It is whether u r open to allow it to happen whenever u find a presence of the divine on the earth.
Soul - that's exactly what happen. Surrender or experience of divine happens whenever I open to allow it. At times I receive knocks to open. But it is still me who open the door to me.
Osho
The master is not an authority. He merely points the way. If u cling to the finger, then it is ur problem, then u need to depend.
Authority is created by the need to depend. Tha master is not authoritative, but the disciple may be in search of authority - then he will create the authority.
You can create an authority anywhere - ur parents, spouse or even a book (bible), even a person who goes on denying authority.
Soul - now I understand why so many people reverred him. Cos in general 80 percent of people were raised on authority.
Osho
A master hits u hard to make u aware. Then ur awareness will do everything. He simply helps u to come out of ur sleep.
A real master does not mould u. He does not put an end to the question but he puts an end to u. He kills u. He kills u so that u can be that which u r destined to be.
Soul - so true. This is good especially since I jus agreed to be trained for Sathsang leader.
Osho.
Understanding is a totally different phenomenon than knowledge.
Understanding transforms your being - in understanding, ur question is finished.
Understanding is depth. Knowledge is shallowness.
Knowledge can be quantified - more or less, u can accumulate knowledge. But understanding is simply understanding. Understanding arises from no-mind
Knowledge is accumulated in the mind, it is the mind trying to be clever. And this mind can befool u immensely.
After years of accumulation of knowledge, they r still the same. Nothing has changed, their being has not been touched by it.
There is no pain, no growth n of course no surrendering. This made the ego more and more subtle and feels very secure.
Joy is not there. Playfulness is not there.
Soul - tell me abt it. I was gathering knowledge until mid last year I said enough, my mind is shitty n the more I accumulate, it still doesn't change me. It didn't make me more happy, it jus made me know why I m not happy.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Universe is responding to my call
Yday meditation was amazing. There were no reply from teachers on Nadha Brahma and I been wondering when is d best time to sing the song. Yday I reached home abt 9.45 pm. After my shower, before meditation, I tot I really have a stress day at office and I needed to release the tension. So tot why don't I sing Nadha Brahma as it will help me to soften up before meditation. I sang and towards the end, tears fell and in d moment, tension was released and I felt soften up. Then I did my shoonya, flood of tears came n then follow by laughter.
Later did my Shakti n d Kapala Bhakti was intense n m now into 120 times already. It was so intense that I can't focus during the counting session for the body breathing n then I tot I can't do the whole Shambavi as I m already into deep meditation. But I recalled my commitment n then a tot came, forgo the legs session and adjourned straight to surka kriya as that is d real starting point of Shambavi and I did that n Shambavi was really intense, my head was shaking on d floor so fast n effortlessly. When it ended wit the quiet session, I saw a blaze of bright light n felt such intense love that give me such bliss and I cried cos I was so touched n thankful that God let me experience this bliss. I said again n again Thank You to God and then followed by quiet session n then laughter.
I don't do guru pooja in d evening cos it takes 8 min and also it got me into immediate meditation which then may not jive wit Shoonya. I am glad God and Sadhguru directed me to Brahma Nanda
I now found my evening meditation mode (1 hour 15 min);
1. Brahma Nanda
2. Shoonya
3. Shakti
4. Shambavi starting from Surka Kriya
Mornin (1 hour 15 min)
1. Guru Pooja
2. Suria Namaskara
3. Relaxing
4. Shakti.
Afternoon (20 min)
1. Shoonya.
Wow. looks like I am spending nearly 3 hours daily to be with the Source. Amazing, me who can't meditate and who can't sing and now sing Sanskrit, hated Suria Namaskara and now can do 7 cycle of Suria Namaskara and can spend tons of time doing meditation. The only exception is m a flowering/expressive meditator rather than quiet meditator. I accept that now. I am so blessed.
I know now God will give me what I need. There is no need to search, guidance comes whenever I need to (even if I didn't know I need it). Amen.
Mmm, suddenly I tot of being Life Coach or a counsellor. Yea, I can also get a Diploma n find a counsellor job abt 4k n meanwhile freelance as Recruiter and Life Coach which can get me 1k.
So many people is comin to me, even a friend's CEO. The sky is the limit.
1. Counsellor
2. Recruiter
3. Life Coach
4. Isha Promoter
Suddenly a sense of quietness envelop me n tears start to well, the statement - This is ME. My heart start to beat in excitement n fear n happy.
Osho
Internal u r not aware - Creativity
From the alchemy of fire and water below to the divine light entering from the above, the figure is literally possessed by the creative force. Really, the experience of creativity is an entry into the mysterious. Technique, expertise and knowledge are just tools; the key is to abandon oneself to the energy that fuels the birth of all things.
The important thing is to be open to what wants to be expressed through u. Remember that we don't possess our creations, they don't belong to us. True creativity arises from a union with the divine, with the mystical and the unknowable. Then it is both a joy for the creator and a blessing to others.
Soul - lookin at the pix, I am reminded of the blazing light I saw during meditation yday.
And now suddenly what I want to do is clear. I do want a few things but all are related to dealing with people. Helping them psychologically and spiritually. Helping others to be who they meant to be.
I know I won't gp into psychology cos that is too specialist n the fee is too much. I can do Diploma in Counselling and start from there.
I used to have doubts cos I want variety but everything is linked. And I used to fear counselling cos I tires easily. Actually is becos I spend all energy at work n stil counsel - double impact n there is no release.
Now, I remove energy from work n got meditation, I will be fine. Helping people to be who they really are is My Calling.
Osho card - Rebirth - Finally the child emerges, innocent and spontaneous and true to his own being.
Compromise. Don't be clever, otherwise you will remain the same, u will not change. Compromise is dangerous n confuse u even more. Compromise may be a way of not going in either direction, Don't compromise on ur own truth.
Soul - I have been compromising. Wanting to stay in work n helping others. Tot helping others won't give me money for security. But alas I can settle my loan and get RM4k job.
My CEO was my mirror. I didn't want to let go just like she didn't want to let go. So is the CEO’s PA.
Schizophrenia
Getting stuck in the indecisive and dualistic aspect of the mind. Whatever decision we make, we will always wonder if we shld have decided the other way. The only way out of this dilemma is, unfortunately, to let go of both arms at once. You can't work your way out by solving it, making lists of pros and cons, or in any way working it out with your mind. Better to follow ur heart, if u can find it.
If you can't , just jump - your heart will start beating so fast that there will be no mistake abt where it is.
Father, Amen.
A voice ask if I m looking for escape. Father, guide me.
Jus read email, the Sathsang teachers are shifting out to China. So they need someone to take charge of Sathsang. Teacher wrote to the meditators – the old timers. Asking us to be the Lead in Sathsang and I agreed. I jumped in but only if don't have to be vegetarian n I can use my blackberry. That is funny, right!! What a coincidence!
I just decided to be Isha promoter this morning and now the call came thru. Universe sure works fast!
Father, U give me whatever I need. I jus fulfilled one of my role - Isha Promoter!
Later did my Shakti n d Kapala Bhakti was intense n m now into 120 times already. It was so intense that I can't focus during the counting session for the body breathing n then I tot I can't do the whole Shambavi as I m already into deep meditation. But I recalled my commitment n then a tot came, forgo the legs session and adjourned straight to surka kriya as that is d real starting point of Shambavi and I did that n Shambavi was really intense, my head was shaking on d floor so fast n effortlessly. When it ended wit the quiet session, I saw a blaze of bright light n felt such intense love that give me such bliss and I cried cos I was so touched n thankful that God let me experience this bliss. I said again n again Thank You to God and then followed by quiet session n then laughter.
I don't do guru pooja in d evening cos it takes 8 min and also it got me into immediate meditation which then may not jive wit Shoonya. I am glad God and Sadhguru directed me to Brahma Nanda
I now found my evening meditation mode (1 hour 15 min);
1. Brahma Nanda
2. Shoonya
3. Shakti
4. Shambavi starting from Surka Kriya
Mornin (1 hour 15 min)
1. Guru Pooja
2. Suria Namaskara
3. Relaxing
4. Shakti.
Afternoon (20 min)
1. Shoonya.
Wow. looks like I am spending nearly 3 hours daily to be with the Source. Amazing, me who can't meditate and who can't sing and now sing Sanskrit, hated Suria Namaskara and now can do 7 cycle of Suria Namaskara and can spend tons of time doing meditation. The only exception is m a flowering/expressive meditator rather than quiet meditator. I accept that now. I am so blessed.
I know now God will give me what I need. There is no need to search, guidance comes whenever I need to (even if I didn't know I need it). Amen.
Mmm, suddenly I tot of being Life Coach or a counsellor. Yea, I can also get a Diploma n find a counsellor job abt 4k n meanwhile freelance as Recruiter and Life Coach which can get me 1k.
So many people is comin to me, even a friend's CEO. The sky is the limit.
1. Counsellor
2. Recruiter
3. Life Coach
4. Isha Promoter
Suddenly a sense of quietness envelop me n tears start to well, the statement - This is ME. My heart start to beat in excitement n fear n happy.
Osho
Internal u r not aware - Creativity
From the alchemy of fire and water below to the divine light entering from the above, the figure is literally possessed by the creative force. Really, the experience of creativity is an entry into the mysterious. Technique, expertise and knowledge are just tools; the key is to abandon oneself to the energy that fuels the birth of all things.
The important thing is to be open to what wants to be expressed through u. Remember that we don't possess our creations, they don't belong to us. True creativity arises from a union with the divine, with the mystical and the unknowable. Then it is both a joy for the creator and a blessing to others.
Soul - lookin at the pix, I am reminded of the blazing light I saw during meditation yday.
And now suddenly what I want to do is clear. I do want a few things but all are related to dealing with people. Helping them psychologically and spiritually. Helping others to be who they meant to be.
I know I won't gp into psychology cos that is too specialist n the fee is too much. I can do Diploma in Counselling and start from there.
I used to have doubts cos I want variety but everything is linked. And I used to fear counselling cos I tires easily. Actually is becos I spend all energy at work n stil counsel - double impact n there is no release.
Now, I remove energy from work n got meditation, I will be fine. Helping people to be who they really are is My Calling.
Osho card - Rebirth - Finally the child emerges, innocent and spontaneous and true to his own being.
Compromise. Don't be clever, otherwise you will remain the same, u will not change. Compromise is dangerous n confuse u even more. Compromise may be a way of not going in either direction, Don't compromise on ur own truth.
Soul - I have been compromising. Wanting to stay in work n helping others. Tot helping others won't give me money for security. But alas I can settle my loan and get RM4k job.
My CEO was my mirror. I didn't want to let go just like she didn't want to let go. So is the CEO’s PA.
Schizophrenia
Getting stuck in the indecisive and dualistic aspect of the mind. Whatever decision we make, we will always wonder if we shld have decided the other way. The only way out of this dilemma is, unfortunately, to let go of both arms at once. You can't work your way out by solving it, making lists of pros and cons, or in any way working it out with your mind. Better to follow ur heart, if u can find it.
If you can't , just jump - your heart will start beating so fast that there will be no mistake abt where it is.
Father, Amen.
A voice ask if I m looking for escape. Father, guide me.
Jus read email, the Sathsang teachers are shifting out to China. So they need someone to take charge of Sathsang. Teacher wrote to the meditators – the old timers. Asking us to be the Lead in Sathsang and I agreed. I jumped in but only if don't have to be vegetarian n I can use my blackberry. That is funny, right!! What a coincidence!
I just decided to be Isha promoter this morning and now the call came thru. Universe sure works fast!
Father, U give me whatever I need. I jus fulfilled one of my role - Isha Promoter!
Your life reflects what you give to the World - It is just your personal mirror
Yday, my BSP friend msn me n we chatted. I shared wit her the incident on Osho, Brahma Nanda and Sadhguru sathsang. I told her that thks to Sadhguru, I m on track. She said I have always be on track. She wished she could laugh like me.
Yday evening, loads of belching in the evening shoonya, similar with afternoon but more deep. Then have a good release during Shambavi. This mornin also has a good release of laughter. My laughter is jus a vibration of sound from my stomach. The energy will grow n rumble n finds its way out n when it comes out as laughter. So, is d same as other meditators who experience their vibration as sensation. As for my tears, when m meditating, m open n vulnerable n hence repressed feeling is expressed.
Osho
Not through expression but through experience, transcendence comes.
U cannot cultivate innocence. If it is cultivated, it wil be plastic, not authentic. You cannot cultivate saintliness. It comes; it is a fragrance.
When u live ur life utterly involved, committed, it comes.
U have looked all around, u have seen everything, u have understood all; in that understanding is transcendence.
Existence
Existence is neutrel, it simply reflects, it is a mirror.
If u r happy, if u r joyous, u share ur happiness and ur joy. You can share only that which u are - and when u share it, it rebounds on you.
Life reflects and echoes whatever u throw at life - it comes back, a thousand fold it comes back. Smile and the whole existence smiles at u.
Shout and abuse, and the whole existence shouts and abuses u. And u are the root cause, u create the whole process.
Soul - the Existence has always smiled at me, except for rship. I guess I wasn't that positive abt rship, feelin bit envious, feeling lack. Feeling fear of having and fear of not having - dilemma. Dilemma represents loss of control.
Mind
Don't trust ur inner voices as they come from minds and u have many minds. Only trust silence.
Silence gives u clarity, gives u light, make u capable of moving rightly. It gives u the eyes to see ur path.
Osho
The Universe itself is God. He is the very core of ur being.
The mind always divides, that is the way to understand.
Love life, and loving life you will be loving God. Search into life, and the deeper u go, the more u will find that the world is transforming its qualities.
When u enter into God, u don't enter into him as if he is a person, u enter into him as a flood of energy.
Yday evening, loads of belching in the evening shoonya, similar with afternoon but more deep. Then have a good release during Shambavi. This mornin also has a good release of laughter. My laughter is jus a vibration of sound from my stomach. The energy will grow n rumble n finds its way out n when it comes out as laughter. So, is d same as other meditators who experience their vibration as sensation. As for my tears, when m meditating, m open n vulnerable n hence repressed feeling is expressed.
Osho
Not through expression but through experience, transcendence comes.
U cannot cultivate innocence. If it is cultivated, it wil be plastic, not authentic. You cannot cultivate saintliness. It comes; it is a fragrance.
When u live ur life utterly involved, committed, it comes.
U have looked all around, u have seen everything, u have understood all; in that understanding is transcendence.
Existence
Existence is neutrel, it simply reflects, it is a mirror.
If u r happy, if u r joyous, u share ur happiness and ur joy. You can share only that which u are - and when u share it, it rebounds on you.
Life reflects and echoes whatever u throw at life - it comes back, a thousand fold it comes back. Smile and the whole existence smiles at u.
Shout and abuse, and the whole existence shouts and abuses u. And u are the root cause, u create the whole process.
Soul - the Existence has always smiled at me, except for rship. I guess I wasn't that positive abt rship, feelin bit envious, feeling lack. Feeling fear of having and fear of not having - dilemma. Dilemma represents loss of control.
Mind
Don't trust ur inner voices as they come from minds and u have many minds. Only trust silence.
Silence gives u clarity, gives u light, make u capable of moving rightly. It gives u the eyes to see ur path.
Osho
The Universe itself is God. He is the very core of ur being.
The mind always divides, that is the way to understand.
Love life, and loving life you will be loving God. Search into life, and the deeper u go, the more u will find that the world is transforming its qualities.
When u enter into God, u don't enter into him as if he is a person, u enter into him as a flood of energy.
Monday, September 7, 2009
We manifest what we valued; What we tot of is what we valued.
Way of Heart 11
All rship are neutrel. It only has meaning that u attached to it.
If u released judgement, its neutrel.
Ur body is a commn device - What do I choose to communicate to the World? Ceaselessly u r manifesting what u have chosen to value.
Ceaselessly, u r engaging in teaching the World what u believe holds the greater truth to u. U have used ur body to communicate judgement causing fear and contraction.
Everything expressing conflict, struggles.
Beneath this, all events remain completely neutrel irrespective of d outcome.
All situation is neutrel until u make a decision what it is to u.
Whenever u attack n don't forgive, u call all the negative manifestation. Each of the moment of forgiveness, reminds u unconditional love and manifest the reality of Christ.
Mastery is a state of fearlessness. When u place a value on a situation and it is outside ur control, it creates fear in u.
Look well where u have places ur value and insist that value is unshakeable.
Look where u r emotionally attached - in terms of any rship.
All the rshp, u have made them what u think they are.
Learn how to transcend the contraction of fear. Fear is the result to the attachement u have placed on man/woman rship.
You decreed it by naming and defining the rship.
Recognise ur response is due to ur decision in the 1st place.
If u cld look it with curiosity if u could define it differently.
If u fear the event from ur own experience and world's experience.
You are a creator and u cannot help but create. The question is what u will create? What is the quality that u create, peace, unlimitedness, forgiveness, compassion.
U have to cultivate this in ur consciousness.
Do u abide and live and experience the enlightenment?
If not, there is something that u have valued apart from enlightenment.
To bring a child like quality to ur experience, as a great form of play.
A creator who understand the ceaseless creation, gladly gives up the energy of denial. Looking at what choice they have made to bring into effect what they are currently experience.
Look at what tot I must have dropped in my mind?
Do not create unconsciously and jus walk away. Learn ceaselessly from ur creation. From here u begin the process of dropping unenlightened being.
Never believe ur tot are neutrel. Ur tot has power of creation and they do not create neutrelly.
Even if the ripples of ur creation comes in not to ur liking, u r still free to choose ur response. Stop reacting as if u were a victim, give it acceptance as all events are neutrel (doesn't affect ur Core) and choose to create wisely again.
Bad or good - just experience of Life. If I look at it lovingly, I can transmute it and send a different set of ripple.
You could never be a victim. If u r a victim, that's means God creates u unlike Himself, it is not possible. Light begets Light. God cannot be victimised and God's creation cannot be a victim.
Begin now to utilise some time to each day in which u sit by urself (Shoonya). Start by acknowledging that u r one wit God.
Since I am a creator, what do I like to create for tomorrow?
Release the value u attached to the event and spend time to create what u wan tomorrow.
What u value - u create
I learn to value unlimitedness, love, fearlessness. I learn to value unbroken communication, my loving tots, I birth and grew up Christ out of the seed of awareness that is in each of u.
Decide what value u have on it. Which way wld u view the world?
Farmer - carefully select the seeds before he does the planting. He pays no attention to the weather, the time, the opinion of others. The farmer then casts out the selected seeds, he nurture n cultivate with a smile on his face, he is not bothered with others who has bear fruit. He never took his consciousness away from the seeds. He never forget he created the fruits based on his selected seeds. He selected seeds that brings the best fruit. Long after the other farmers that experience drought, fruit that not saleable.
Will u elect to join the hasty farmer or the one farmer who knows how to create wisely and rest on perfect certainty that the ripples of heaven will replace the ripples of hell that was created unconsciously.
Nothing burst from by accident. Therefore create like God. You are a farmer n u will indeed u will harvest the quality of seed u selected and planted.
Choose only loving tot in ur consciousness. That which extend joy, the good.
I promise u - you will experience all that I have known and more. Abundance, perfect peace, perfect miracle mindedness, perfect communication in bliss wit all creation.
You will experience creation. What that creation is will be entirely up to u.
Choose to receive peace.
Soul
I tot my friend was crazy delusional to think there is love affair when she hasn't even spoke to the guy yet.
But now I tot she is brave.
What is my view of rship? Let me see this.
Father, I want to review my tot on rship. I want an alternative view. I have worked on my job and now to unloosen my attachment to rship.
Let me have a different tot. Let my friend's rship be successful n unsuccessful like I expect.
This 52 days of Nine of Heart. Let me be dead to my attachment to rship. Let me have an alternative view.
On d bamboo house with view of nature. I said I wanted it and now there is such a house. So, it is a start.
Rship. I have created a lack in me.
The farmer reminds me of me selecting the seed. I m on the right path.
My seed of my partner.
Rich
Smart
Loving
Spiritual
Bamboo house with a glass view of nature.
All rship are neutrel. It only has meaning that u attached to it.
If u released judgement, its neutrel.
Ur body is a commn device - What do I choose to communicate to the World? Ceaselessly u r manifesting what u have chosen to value.
Ceaselessly, u r engaging in teaching the World what u believe holds the greater truth to u. U have used ur body to communicate judgement causing fear and contraction.
Everything expressing conflict, struggles.
Beneath this, all events remain completely neutrel irrespective of d outcome.
All situation is neutrel until u make a decision what it is to u.
Whenever u attack n don't forgive, u call all the negative manifestation. Each of the moment of forgiveness, reminds u unconditional love and manifest the reality of Christ.
Mastery is a state of fearlessness. When u place a value on a situation and it is outside ur control, it creates fear in u.
Look well where u have places ur value and insist that value is unshakeable.
Look where u r emotionally attached - in terms of any rship.
All the rshp, u have made them what u think they are.
Learn how to transcend the contraction of fear. Fear is the result to the attachement u have placed on man/woman rship.
You decreed it by naming and defining the rship.
Recognise ur response is due to ur decision in the 1st place.
If u cld look it with curiosity if u could define it differently.
If u fear the event from ur own experience and world's experience.
You are a creator and u cannot help but create. The question is what u will create? What is the quality that u create, peace, unlimitedness, forgiveness, compassion.
U have to cultivate this in ur consciousness.
Do u abide and live and experience the enlightenment?
If not, there is something that u have valued apart from enlightenment.
To bring a child like quality to ur experience, as a great form of play.
A creator who understand the ceaseless creation, gladly gives up the energy of denial. Looking at what choice they have made to bring into effect what they are currently experience.
Look at what tot I must have dropped in my mind?
Do not create unconsciously and jus walk away. Learn ceaselessly from ur creation. From here u begin the process of dropping unenlightened being.
Never believe ur tot are neutrel. Ur tot has power of creation and they do not create neutrelly.
Even if the ripples of ur creation comes in not to ur liking, u r still free to choose ur response. Stop reacting as if u were a victim, give it acceptance as all events are neutrel (doesn't affect ur Core) and choose to create wisely again.
Bad or good - just experience of Life. If I look at it lovingly, I can transmute it and send a different set of ripple.
You could never be a victim. If u r a victim, that's means God creates u unlike Himself, it is not possible. Light begets Light. God cannot be victimised and God's creation cannot be a victim.
Begin now to utilise some time to each day in which u sit by urself (Shoonya). Start by acknowledging that u r one wit God.
Since I am a creator, what do I like to create for tomorrow?
Release the value u attached to the event and spend time to create what u wan tomorrow.
What u value - u create
I learn to value unlimitedness, love, fearlessness. I learn to value unbroken communication, my loving tots, I birth and grew up Christ out of the seed of awareness that is in each of u.
Decide what value u have on it. Which way wld u view the world?
Farmer - carefully select the seeds before he does the planting. He pays no attention to the weather, the time, the opinion of others. The farmer then casts out the selected seeds, he nurture n cultivate with a smile on his face, he is not bothered with others who has bear fruit. He never took his consciousness away from the seeds. He never forget he created the fruits based on his selected seeds. He selected seeds that brings the best fruit. Long after the other farmers that experience drought, fruit that not saleable.
Will u elect to join the hasty farmer or the one farmer who knows how to create wisely and rest on perfect certainty that the ripples of heaven will replace the ripples of hell that was created unconsciously.
Nothing burst from by accident. Therefore create like God. You are a farmer n u will indeed u will harvest the quality of seed u selected and planted.
Choose only loving tot in ur consciousness. That which extend joy, the good.
I promise u - you will experience all that I have known and more. Abundance, perfect peace, perfect miracle mindedness, perfect communication in bliss wit all creation.
You will experience creation. What that creation is will be entirely up to u.
Choose to receive peace.
Soul
I tot my friend was crazy delusional to think there is love affair when she hasn't even spoke to the guy yet.
But now I tot she is brave.
What is my view of rship? Let me see this.
Father, I want to review my tot on rship. I want an alternative view. I have worked on my job and now to unloosen my attachment to rship.
Let me have a different tot. Let my friend's rship be successful n unsuccessful like I expect.
This 52 days of Nine of Heart. Let me be dead to my attachment to rship. Let me have an alternative view.
On d bamboo house with view of nature. I said I wanted it and now there is such a house. So, it is a start.
Rship. I have created a lack in me.
The farmer reminds me of me selecting the seed. I m on the right path.
My seed of my partner.
Rich
Smart
Loving
Spiritual
Bamboo house with a glass view of nature.
Nadha Brahma - sound from beyond
Today I jus did one round of Shakti n 2 rounds of Shoonya. Didn't feel like doing the weekend session. Weekday I do becos I have to clear the residue of d day n also too stress. But weekend, no stress, so am not willing to do. Of cos, listening to Yashita who do twice in weekend but once in weekday. So am fine :)
Father, jus now when I did Shoonya, I cried firstly cos I haven't found my partner and secondly judging myself why I still want one, despite having so much, especially after meditation.
I really like d bamboo house - with both living room and master bedroom looking at nature - trees, sky and wind. All Nature's energy.
Today swimming was good, I really feel myself lighter n floating. Did my 6 lapse with less rest. So, is good.
On d partner thingy. Part of me want, part of me don't wan the distressing feeling that comes in rship. I don't wan the feeling of not being in control. I don't like my feelings to affect me. Looks like me still in square 1.
Wonder what's is a better way. To face my fear of rship or to transcend it.
Sadhguru
Nadha Bhramha - Sound of the Divine.
Where there is vibration, there is bound to be sound. The whole existence is just a vibration.
Soul - what a coincidence. Of all the pages, I flip to the section on Nadha Bhramha I bought the cd in India and now listening to Nadha Bhramha. Before I laugh, the stomach muscle contract n then start vibrating and when I open my mouth, it comes out as laughter.
Just sang Nadha Bhramha wit Sadhguru on cd.
Sadhgury
Nature is allowing time for this mango sapling to grow to certain sturdiness, a certain maturity. Only then it flower and bears fruit.
Sufficient space has to be given so that the mind, the body and the emotions develop and mature in a certain way before the other dimension becomes alive in that person.
Soul - Sadhguru answering me to let my Inner Being time before it can converted to Outer Being.
Father, jus now when I did Shoonya, I cried firstly cos I haven't found my partner and secondly judging myself why I still want one, despite having so much, especially after meditation.
I really like d bamboo house - with both living room and master bedroom looking at nature - trees, sky and wind. All Nature's energy.
Today swimming was good, I really feel myself lighter n floating. Did my 6 lapse with less rest. So, is good.
On d partner thingy. Part of me want, part of me don't wan the distressing feeling that comes in rship. I don't wan the feeling of not being in control. I don't like my feelings to affect me. Looks like me still in square 1.
Wonder what's is a better way. To face my fear of rship or to transcend it.
Sadhguru
Nadha Bhramha - Sound of the Divine.
Where there is vibration, there is bound to be sound. The whole existence is just a vibration.
Soul - what a coincidence. Of all the pages, I flip to the section on Nadha Bhramha I bought the cd in India and now listening to Nadha Bhramha. Before I laugh, the stomach muscle contract n then start vibrating and when I open my mouth, it comes out as laughter.
Just sang Nadha Bhramha wit Sadhguru on cd.
Sadhgury
Nature is allowing time for this mango sapling to grow to certain sturdiness, a certain maturity. Only then it flower and bears fruit.
Sufficient space has to be given so that the mind, the body and the emotions develop and mature in a certain way before the other dimension becomes alive in that person.
Soul - Sadhguru answering me to let my Inner Being time before it can converted to Outer Being.
Still following Sadhguru and now in Bhakti mode
Father, did my Guru Pooja, Suria Namaskara and Shakti. Feels good. Yesterday was feeling bit guilty that mom has to sleep in dad’s room. But let's face it. Both she n me is not ready to face my meditational experience. She wouldn't understand n would be afraid of my meditation and me afraid of her judgement, will clamp up. Anyway, I paid for the house and I deserved to have a room to myself that I can do my yoga practices.
My Osho for the week.
1. The Creator - the one who works on himself, his own being. You are carrying a masterpiece hidden within u, but u r standing in the way. Jus move aside, then the masterpiece will be revealed.
Only when u r integrated, where there is no difference between who u r inside and who u are in the outside world, u can use ur Energy for creation rather than destruction. Use whatever skills u have, whatever u have learned from ur own life experience, it becomes
Soul - yeap, I was having so much conflicting views before seeing Sadhguru and now m on track. I recalled I got 2 Energy card wrongly used for destruction. I guess it was talking abt me. Instead of using the Energy to work on my integration, I used it to attack others and myself too.
My goal has always been to work on myself. Yday checked out d cd on Nadha Bramha n it state that listening will make a person soften. I like that.
Ironically my 52 days card is 9 of heart, death of rship and teaching others. I interpret this as death of my old self.
2. Integration
The conflict is in man. Unless it is resolved there, it cannot be resolved anywhere else. The politics is within you; it is between two parts of the mind.
The eagle and the swan are both beings of flight and majesty. The eagle is the embodiment of power and aloneness. The swan is the embodiment of space and purity, gently floating and diving, upon and within the element of the emotions, entirely content and complete within her perfection of beauty.
The card of integration is the symbol of self creation, new life and mystical union otherwise known as alchemy.
Soul - looks like I guess it right my Nine Heart card, the death of old me and the birth of new Me.
3. Politics
The mind is political. Always scheming and manipulating. You have been playing this game for so long and to continue is painful. It doesn't serve anybody's interest in the end, least of all yours. Whatever u might achieve in this way will just turn into dust.
Soul - I was judging the followers. Guess I was judging myself too. Jus stop it loh. Its time. I no longer wan to receive this card. Jus let the Inner (Unconscious) me come out. The Outer (conscious) me has to be broken, I no longer has to contain it. The Outer is not me and I need not be afraid of losing it.
4. What is needed - Rebirth.
Your consciousness is only a mirror. Neither do u come, nor do u go. Things come and go. All these states are simply reflections in an eternal pool of consciousness.
First - camel (sleepy and depressed, ives in delusion, thinkin arrived but very concerned wit others' opinion)
Second - lion (alone and proud, roaring our truth)
Third - child (neither acquiescent nor rebellious, but innocent and spontaneous and true to his own being.
Wherever u are, be aware that it will evolve into something new if u allow it. It is a time of growth and change.
Soul - yeap, finally I calmed down when I realising it was d internal/external conflict. This card tells me that m not losing anything. The outer is not me. And it changes, if I jus allow it.
And I now welcome it.
5. Resolution - Receptivity.
When u r receptive, the door is open. You will have no head, no busy and aggressive mind to hinder ur pure receptivity. You become in tune with the harmony of the Universe.
Sensitivy, intuition and compassion are the qualities that shine forth now, dissolving all the obstacles that keep us separate from each other and from the whole.
Soul - Amen.
Afternoon
Was reading Osho discourse. He claims that his sannyasins is connected with him. Fell in love with. Surrender to him. I didn't like it cos that's arrogance cos I surrender only to God, to my Inner Being. At first was thinking of Sadhguru, he too claimed that u will not retrograde in after life if u stay with him. But then this doesn't coincide wit what he said abt our aim is to connect with Universe and we can only do so if we r on same level wit Universe, which is joy. So our aim is to live joyously.
Osho
Mind can only exist either in the past or in the future. It cannot exists in the present. Hence it is always running.
The past is no more and the future is yet to be, both are non existential. Mind lives on non-existential and hence it cannot be existent itself. It is a shadow, it is not a reality.
One has to stop rushing and running. That's what meditation is all about; stopping the mind herenow, bringing it to the present.
The moment u bring the mind to the present, it melts and disappear.
Mind is negativity, no-mind is positivity.
Drop the psychological past and psychological future.
The path of love (Bhakti) is like a delicate rose. It is the feminine path. And only those who are really heart people can follow the path. You will have to become more and more sensitive, receptive, passive, allowing - that's the meaning of surrender.
(Sadhguru also said is the most direct path but also dangerous cos very few people are innocent like a child)
The devotee knows the chemistry, the alchemy of dissolving the ego. And he is ready to give his head. That is his surrender.
Soul - this is so similar to my weekly Osho reading. I have started as Gnana, then do Kriya and now d way is Bhakti (to drop my head and use my heart instead).
I recalled Sadhguru said the 4 will combine, its jus a matter of combination ratios.
So, that means for me, the last will be Karma Yoga.
For now is Bhakti as I m now in the feeling mode.
My Osho for the week.
1. The Creator - the one who works on himself, his own being. You are carrying a masterpiece hidden within u, but u r standing in the way. Jus move aside, then the masterpiece will be revealed.
Only when u r integrated, where there is no difference between who u r inside and who u are in the outside world, u can use ur Energy for creation rather than destruction. Use whatever skills u have, whatever u have learned from ur own life experience, it becomes
Soul - yeap, I was having so much conflicting views before seeing Sadhguru and now m on track. I recalled I got 2 Energy card wrongly used for destruction. I guess it was talking abt me. Instead of using the Energy to work on my integration, I used it to attack others and myself too.
My goal has always been to work on myself. Yday checked out d cd on Nadha Bramha n it state that listening will make a person soften. I like that.
Ironically my 52 days card is 9 of heart, death of rship and teaching others. I interpret this as death of my old self.
2. Integration
The conflict is in man. Unless it is resolved there, it cannot be resolved anywhere else. The politics is within you; it is between two parts of the mind.
The eagle and the swan are both beings of flight and majesty. The eagle is the embodiment of power and aloneness. The swan is the embodiment of space and purity, gently floating and diving, upon and within the element of the emotions, entirely content and complete within her perfection of beauty.
The card of integration is the symbol of self creation, new life and mystical union otherwise known as alchemy.
Soul - looks like I guess it right my Nine Heart card, the death of old me and the birth of new Me.
3. Politics
The mind is political. Always scheming and manipulating. You have been playing this game for so long and to continue is painful. It doesn't serve anybody's interest in the end, least of all yours. Whatever u might achieve in this way will just turn into dust.
Soul - I was judging the followers. Guess I was judging myself too. Jus stop it loh. Its time. I no longer wan to receive this card. Jus let the Inner (Unconscious) me come out. The Outer (conscious) me has to be broken, I no longer has to contain it. The Outer is not me and I need not be afraid of losing it.
4. What is needed - Rebirth.
Your consciousness is only a mirror. Neither do u come, nor do u go. Things come and go. All these states are simply reflections in an eternal pool of consciousness.
First - camel (sleepy and depressed, ives in delusion, thinkin arrived but very concerned wit others' opinion)
Second - lion (alone and proud, roaring our truth)
Third - child (neither acquiescent nor rebellious, but innocent and spontaneous and true to his own being.
Wherever u are, be aware that it will evolve into something new if u allow it. It is a time of growth and change.
Soul - yeap, finally I calmed down when I realising it was d internal/external conflict. This card tells me that m not losing anything. The outer is not me. And it changes, if I jus allow it.
And I now welcome it.
5. Resolution - Receptivity.
When u r receptive, the door is open. You will have no head, no busy and aggressive mind to hinder ur pure receptivity. You become in tune with the harmony of the Universe.
Sensitivy, intuition and compassion are the qualities that shine forth now, dissolving all the obstacles that keep us separate from each other and from the whole.
Soul - Amen.
Afternoon
Was reading Osho discourse. He claims that his sannyasins is connected with him. Fell in love with. Surrender to him. I didn't like it cos that's arrogance cos I surrender only to God, to my Inner Being. At first was thinking of Sadhguru, he too claimed that u will not retrograde in after life if u stay with him. But then this doesn't coincide wit what he said abt our aim is to connect with Universe and we can only do so if we r on same level wit Universe, which is joy. So our aim is to live joyously.
Osho
Mind can only exist either in the past or in the future. It cannot exists in the present. Hence it is always running.
The past is no more and the future is yet to be, both are non existential. Mind lives on non-existential and hence it cannot be existent itself. It is a shadow, it is not a reality.
One has to stop rushing and running. That's what meditation is all about; stopping the mind herenow, bringing it to the present.
The moment u bring the mind to the present, it melts and disappear.
Mind is negativity, no-mind is positivity.
Drop the psychological past and psychological future.
The path of love (Bhakti) is like a delicate rose. It is the feminine path. And only those who are really heart people can follow the path. You will have to become more and more sensitive, receptive, passive, allowing - that's the meaning of surrender.
(Sadhguru also said is the most direct path but also dangerous cos very few people are innocent like a child)
The devotee knows the chemistry, the alchemy of dissolving the ego. And he is ready to give his head. That is his surrender.
Soul - this is so similar to my weekly Osho reading. I have started as Gnana, then do Kriya and now d way is Bhakti (to drop my head and use my heart instead).
I recalled Sadhguru said the 4 will combine, its jus a matter of combination ratios.
So, that means for me, the last will be Karma Yoga.
For now is Bhakti as I m now in the feeling mode.
When u r open, u accept, when u accept, u flower and in that flowering, God appears
Osho
God is happening. This is what life is all about. The moment u accept urself, u become open, u become vulnerable, u become receptive. The moment u accept urself, then there is no need for any future, because there is no need to improve on anything. Then, all is good as it is. In that experience, life starts taking a new colour, a new music arises.
Soul - same msg as Sadhguru. I felt the msg is tellin me that m on d right track. Don't stop. Its ok to receive. Don't be fearful. I am thinking of 3rd level meditation more becos of Sadhguru rather than me. Mmm, falling again but this time not as fearful that I lost me. Resentful that I have to let go of food and do volunteering. Resentful I have to give myself. Not willing to pay the price to receive and hence I judged the giving.
Osho
If u accept urself, that is the beginning of accepting all. If u accept urself, u hav accepted God. Then there is nothing else to do but to enjoy, to celebrate. Then joy is good and sadness is good, then to be with ur beloved is good and to be alone is good. Then whatsoever happens is good because it happens out of God.
But u have been conditioned for centuries not to accept urself - to improve urself. They all create anxiety in u. Anxiety is the tense state between that which u are and that which u shld be.
Soul - yeah I was feeling anxiety that if I followed Sadhguru I still have to do more or perhaps to let go of more. I felt resentful. Alas now I knew how I do it is up to me. The thing is not to judge the giving. I need not feel guilty if I don't behave like them. I need not feel guilty for being receptive and yet not behave like them. No one is forcing me too. It is me feeling guilty, that's all. I can jus be who I am, receiving All and bloom in my own time. I need not feel guilty in receiving.
Osho.
When u stop improving upon urself, life improves u. In that relaxation, in that acceptance, life starts caressing you, life starts flowing through you. And when u don't have any grudge, no complaint, you bloom, you flower.
Don't lose this thread that has fallen into ur hands. Accept urself as u are. And that is the most difficult thing in the world because it goes against ur training, ur education, ur culture.
Soul - I am dropping the grudge of receiving from Sadhguru. Previously, I have been falling unconsciously cos there is something in me that resides with Sadhguru. There is a conflict between my unconsciousness and consciousness. And now I consciously see what I want. Yeap, to take the journey. In a way, I admire sis that she dares to be baptised, whereas me was afraid cos I don't want to lose what I have, I don't want to let go, I don't want to improve.
Actually, there is nothing to lose. I have gained so much since I meditated. I am now much calmer, I can feel both my emotion of sadness and joy, I can absorb the Energy of the Nature. I have feel completeness. I have felt love within me.
Now inside match outside in terms of emotional make up.
Now as for the energy, its the Outside that have to match Inside. That's is what the Osho card meant abt if Energy not used it will turn negative.
So, will do hatha yoga to release the Energy.
Osho
And the whole existence starts pouring its energy into u when u are open. Then the trees are greener than they look to u, then the sun is sunnier.
Soul - yeap, that's what I feel whenever I am near nature, I felt their energy pouring into me, enveloping me.
Osho
Accept urself ; that is gratitude. Relax into ur being. In no other way did he want u to be, otherwise he would have made u somebody else.
Soul - I am receptive to Sadhguru, to Nature and if my behaviour is different from the rest of them, so be it since my expression of receptiveness is also different.
I am different. I am Me. I need not be like them.
I judged them cos I tot they won't accept me in terms of my meditation and outside meditation. At least they have accepted that I have different expression during meditation and now I just have to accept m different. That's all. Don't have to let this drive me away.
Osho
When joy comes, in spite of urself, mind you; when joy comes in spite of urself, when sometimes God simply bumps into you and u cannot avoid him, immediately u start punishing urself. Something has gone wrong; how can this happen to a horrible person like u?
Soul - that's it. Tears welt within me. I am feeling guilty for receiving so much when I do nothing. Others has struggled n do so much and yet receive nothing. How can this be?? Or perhaps I was mistaken, perhaps all my experiences is just a release cos I got loads of issues (like what a fellow meditator told me) and they don't have any issues and hence no expression.
Whenever I receive more, I feel fearful cos firstly, not sure if I am receiving or releasinhg and secondly if receiving, feel guilty cos I have done nothing to deserve it, unlike the others and I have not been prayerful/respectful to Sadhguru, unlike the others. Thirdly, worried that the more I receive, I may become like them, bit like robot, no mind of their own, no spontaneity, no joy.
That's is why the Sathsang when Sadhguru said u will only receive the Energy when u live joyfully. Cos the Universe is joyful. If u r not joyful, no matter what u do, u will never receive. Sadhguru also said it is good that women can laugh. Its only miserable people who doesn't want to hear laughter.
For the first time, I know I am receiving and I know its ok to be joyful and I know that I won't turn into them. That's why I will continue the path.
Osho
Learn more and more acceptance and unlearn ur rejections. If u understand this, u will understand laughter. Otherwise the ordinarily so-called religious know nothing of laughter, they have become cemetries - serious, somber, unlaughing, unloving, undancing.
God is always the God of love and laughter and light.
The real God is always a God of laughter. Whenever u think of God, think of him laughing, think of him rolling on the floor with great laughter, and u will be closer to God.
When u really laugh, for that moment, u r no more on the earth, for that moment, all weight disappears. For that moment, the window opens, you are divine.
Whenever you laugh, you are closest to the divine. Whenever you love, you are closest to the divine. Whenever you sing and dance and make music, that is what real religuon consist of.
Soul - another reaffirmation that's is ok to laugh. M not crazy. I am not creating it. Its just a by-product of Energy.
God is happening. This is what life is all about. The moment u accept urself, u become open, u become vulnerable, u become receptive. The moment u accept urself, then there is no need for any future, because there is no need to improve on anything. Then, all is good as it is. In that experience, life starts taking a new colour, a new music arises.
Soul - same msg as Sadhguru. I felt the msg is tellin me that m on d right track. Don't stop. Its ok to receive. Don't be fearful. I am thinking of 3rd level meditation more becos of Sadhguru rather than me. Mmm, falling again but this time not as fearful that I lost me. Resentful that I have to let go of food and do volunteering. Resentful I have to give myself. Not willing to pay the price to receive and hence I judged the giving.
Osho
If u accept urself, that is the beginning of accepting all. If u accept urself, u hav accepted God. Then there is nothing else to do but to enjoy, to celebrate. Then joy is good and sadness is good, then to be with ur beloved is good and to be alone is good. Then whatsoever happens is good because it happens out of God.
But u have been conditioned for centuries not to accept urself - to improve urself. They all create anxiety in u. Anxiety is the tense state between that which u are and that which u shld be.
Soul - yeah I was feeling anxiety that if I followed Sadhguru I still have to do more or perhaps to let go of more. I felt resentful. Alas now I knew how I do it is up to me. The thing is not to judge the giving. I need not feel guilty if I don't behave like them. I need not feel guilty for being receptive and yet not behave like them. No one is forcing me too. It is me feeling guilty, that's all. I can jus be who I am, receiving All and bloom in my own time. I need not feel guilty in receiving.
Osho.
When u stop improving upon urself, life improves u. In that relaxation, in that acceptance, life starts caressing you, life starts flowing through you. And when u don't have any grudge, no complaint, you bloom, you flower.
Don't lose this thread that has fallen into ur hands. Accept urself as u are. And that is the most difficult thing in the world because it goes against ur training, ur education, ur culture.
Soul - I am dropping the grudge of receiving from Sadhguru. Previously, I have been falling unconsciously cos there is something in me that resides with Sadhguru. There is a conflict between my unconsciousness and consciousness. And now I consciously see what I want. Yeap, to take the journey. In a way, I admire sis that she dares to be baptised, whereas me was afraid cos I don't want to lose what I have, I don't want to let go, I don't want to improve.
Actually, there is nothing to lose. I have gained so much since I meditated. I am now much calmer, I can feel both my emotion of sadness and joy, I can absorb the Energy of the Nature. I have feel completeness. I have felt love within me.
Now inside match outside in terms of emotional make up.
Now as for the energy, its the Outside that have to match Inside. That's is what the Osho card meant abt if Energy not used it will turn negative.
So, will do hatha yoga to release the Energy.
Osho
And the whole existence starts pouring its energy into u when u are open. Then the trees are greener than they look to u, then the sun is sunnier.
Soul - yeap, that's what I feel whenever I am near nature, I felt their energy pouring into me, enveloping me.
Osho
Accept urself ; that is gratitude. Relax into ur being. In no other way did he want u to be, otherwise he would have made u somebody else.
Soul - I am receptive to Sadhguru, to Nature and if my behaviour is different from the rest of them, so be it since my expression of receptiveness is also different.
I am different. I am Me. I need not be like them.
I judged them cos I tot they won't accept me in terms of my meditation and outside meditation. At least they have accepted that I have different expression during meditation and now I just have to accept m different. That's all. Don't have to let this drive me away.
Osho
When joy comes, in spite of urself, mind you; when joy comes in spite of urself, when sometimes God simply bumps into you and u cannot avoid him, immediately u start punishing urself. Something has gone wrong; how can this happen to a horrible person like u?
Soul - that's it. Tears welt within me. I am feeling guilty for receiving so much when I do nothing. Others has struggled n do so much and yet receive nothing. How can this be?? Or perhaps I was mistaken, perhaps all my experiences is just a release cos I got loads of issues (like what a fellow meditator told me) and they don't have any issues and hence no expression.
Whenever I receive more, I feel fearful cos firstly, not sure if I am receiving or releasinhg and secondly if receiving, feel guilty cos I have done nothing to deserve it, unlike the others and I have not been prayerful/respectful to Sadhguru, unlike the others. Thirdly, worried that the more I receive, I may become like them, bit like robot, no mind of their own, no spontaneity, no joy.
That's is why the Sathsang when Sadhguru said u will only receive the Energy when u live joyfully. Cos the Universe is joyful. If u r not joyful, no matter what u do, u will never receive. Sadhguru also said it is good that women can laugh. Its only miserable people who doesn't want to hear laughter.
For the first time, I know I am receiving and I know its ok to be joyful and I know that I won't turn into them. That's why I will continue the path.
Osho
Learn more and more acceptance and unlearn ur rejections. If u understand this, u will understand laughter. Otherwise the ordinarily so-called religious know nothing of laughter, they have become cemetries - serious, somber, unlaughing, unloving, undancing.
God is always the God of love and laughter and light.
The real God is always a God of laughter. Whenever u think of God, think of him laughing, think of him rolling on the floor with great laughter, and u will be closer to God.
When u really laugh, for that moment, u r no more on the earth, for that moment, all weight disappears. For that moment, the window opens, you are divine.
Whenever you laugh, you are closest to the divine. Whenever you love, you are closest to the divine. Whenever you sing and dance and make music, that is what real religuon consist of.
Soul - another reaffirmation that's is ok to laugh. M not crazy. I am not creating it. Its just a by-product of Energy.
I am back with Sadhguru
Jus did my evenin kriyas. Was crying loads at the start of Shambavi. I guess that's my guilt on leaving Sadhguru. I cried and cried, then I said I won't leave him and I will sit infront of his pix during Sathsang and the tears stop.
Now I know why I cried loads during the last song in sathsang with Sadhguru. It is song abt Isha, cherishing and thanking Isha for the peace and joy it brought. Here I actually plan to leave n that's why I cried and cried.
Yeap, I fell again deeper after seeing Sadhguru. He has given us so much and here me being recalcitrant and judge him for things not within his control. He can't control or manage his thousands of followers and I shouldn't judge him.
I know I wil commit to the consecration cos it is his baby and I want to pay my respect.
As for the third level, still not sure but at least resistant not as high. I m still not keen on hatta yoga. For now just commit to going to the consecration.
Sadhguru
In every life that u come here, whether u have one hole or one hundred holes, every time people come, they go back empty-handed. Nothing attained, nothing gained, u r coming and going, birth and death.
Only when u plug those holes u don't have to go to the river. The river comes to u; that is how it is. You don't have to go in search of God anymore. The moment your receptivity is right, God is. There is no need to search for God, to search for Truth. The moment ur receptivity is right. Truth is. It is more essential than u and me. It is more essential than existence itself. It is not something that u search for; it is just that u r prepared to receive; that's all.
Plug all ur holes and it is there.
First of all, stop puncturing urself. If u stop punching holes into urself, the holes that are already there are easy to close.
Your problem is creating new and newer karmas. That's the whole problem. If that is stopped, u will see that the sense of buoyancy increases every day. Day by day, u will see that things are going up, not down anymore.
Watch urself and do not make any new holes. That is the most importanbt aspects of sadhana.
Soul - Father, I will stop running. The river has come to me and its time I face it. I will sit infront of Sadhguru pix. So what if I am expressive (this is jus my old fear of not havin control). I will be who I truly am. To laugh and to cry. Cos if I am shy even during meditation, then I surely be more repressive outside meditation. Let's jus savour the river that is flowing in me. Stop trying to resist the flow.
Timing is perfect that Sadhguru is here cos I was prepared to run away again after Shoonya. I am staying. Even if I don't believe or ascribe the practices such as volunteer and etc, I am thankful to Sadhguru.
Now I know why I cried loads during the last song in sathsang with Sadhguru. It is song abt Isha, cherishing and thanking Isha for the peace and joy it brought. Here I actually plan to leave n that's why I cried and cried.
Yeap, I fell again deeper after seeing Sadhguru. He has given us so much and here me being recalcitrant and judge him for things not within his control. He can't control or manage his thousands of followers and I shouldn't judge him.
I know I wil commit to the consecration cos it is his baby and I want to pay my respect.
As for the third level, still not sure but at least resistant not as high. I m still not keen on hatta yoga. For now just commit to going to the consecration.
Sadhguru
In every life that u come here, whether u have one hole or one hundred holes, every time people come, they go back empty-handed. Nothing attained, nothing gained, u r coming and going, birth and death.
Only when u plug those holes u don't have to go to the river. The river comes to u; that is how it is. You don't have to go in search of God anymore. The moment your receptivity is right, God is. There is no need to search for God, to search for Truth. The moment ur receptivity is right. Truth is. It is more essential than u and me. It is more essential than existence itself. It is not something that u search for; it is just that u r prepared to receive; that's all.
Plug all ur holes and it is there.
First of all, stop puncturing urself. If u stop punching holes into urself, the holes that are already there are easy to close.
Your problem is creating new and newer karmas. That's the whole problem. If that is stopped, u will see that the sense of buoyancy increases every day. Day by day, u will see that things are going up, not down anymore.
Watch urself and do not make any new holes. That is the most importanbt aspects of sadhana.
Soul - Father, I will stop running. The river has come to me and its time I face it. I will sit infront of Sadhguru pix. So what if I am expressive (this is jus my old fear of not havin control). I will be who I truly am. To laugh and to cry. Cos if I am shy even during meditation, then I surely be more repressive outside meditation. Let's jus savour the river that is flowing in me. Stop trying to resist the flow.
Timing is perfect that Sadhguru is here cos I was prepared to run away again after Shoonya. I am staying. Even if I don't believe or ascribe the practices such as volunteer and etc, I am thankful to Sadhguru.
Sathsang with Sadhguru
Osho
You have been told that if u seek, u shall find. But I say unto u; don't believe he who claims to have sought and found, but only he who has found without seeking. Seeking is basically the self. If u seek, that means the self is functioning. The journey starts in seeking but ends in a non-seeking mind. The journey starts with intention but ends in spontaneity. You have to learn two things; first u have to learn a great intensity to search, and then paradoxically, you will have to learn to drop that intensity and that seeking.
Soul - I started my inward journey 11 years ago with such intensity until a year back, I drop my search cos I have explored enough dirt and also I no longer trust my mind. I stopped n jus wan to rest my mind and started meditation. Now with Sadhguru's help, I have found back my Energy and its something amazing that is not created by me, something wonderful as its both quiet my mind and gives me such joy and makes me laugh and followed by such feeling of Love, of completeness. Amazing.
Osho
Kabir drives the point deep into ur heart that first, a great flame-like desire is needed to be God. But then finally that very desire becomes the last barrier - that has to be dropped too. Once that is dropped and u are innocent, things start happening. The bud opens and becomes a flower, the caterpillar becomes a butterfly.
Soul - coincidentally, after using my blackberry for 1 year, tot of changing my wall paper n selected a beautiful butterfly cos I feel I have transformed from a caterpillar to a beautiful butterfly and I am flying. Amen.
Osho
Kabir asked student, where is God? Their answer, He is the breath inside the breath.
Soul - suddenly my tears welt, cos God is the breath inside my breath. When I breathe during Shoonya, I felt His silent breathe after mine and it connect me with Him. Amen.
Its now half an hour past, m stil silent, tears hovering in my eyes, m so grateful to connect wit Him.
Evenin
Jus finished sathsang wit Sadhguru. I m glad my faith in him was restored. My time spent in Ashram, stir me up cos our path is different.
My experience of Sadhguru is d same as in his videos.
Not sure why, suddenly there was a topic of laughter. Aha, he mentioned to live joyfully and its good that women can laugh. He cannot understand why some men don't want women to laugh. He wouldn't like to live with a woman who can't laugh.
I was already glad when he said that cos at least its ok that I can laugh.
Then he came out with the story of his grandmother n he said she was called a Devil of a woman cos she love to laugh n live to be 100 plus, outlived all her children and even some grandchildren. She also share food with animals. We'll, at least I fulfill one and m glad. At last I can laugh freely. Wit that I laugh openly. Just like in the Ashram, I realised in the whole sathsang, perhaps abt 600 meditators, I think I am one of the few that laugh.
Asia Works taught me is ok to cry
Isha Yoga taught me is ok to laugh.
When Sadhguru was talkin abt ok to laugh. I had flashback of my dad asking us to tone down the volume whenever he hear any commotion. He tot we were fighting. So, laughter, so called joyful noise was kept to a minimum.
I was sorry I snapped at the gal. She asked my why I laugh. She asked if I see any vision. I tot she is a regular meditator n she queried me. She then back off and told me she is new. So, I soften my tone to explain. She said she has done Shambavi n so far no such experience. I explained to her everyone is different. She don't have to compare. I told her jus continue doing and feel n experience her body.
When Sadhguru spoke abt the major event abt d dhayanalinga. He said he was excited n has not felt such excitement for past 20 years, I laugh.
You have been told that if u seek, u shall find. But I say unto u; don't believe he who claims to have sought and found, but only he who has found without seeking. Seeking is basically the self. If u seek, that means the self is functioning. The journey starts in seeking but ends in a non-seeking mind. The journey starts with intention but ends in spontaneity. You have to learn two things; first u have to learn a great intensity to search, and then paradoxically, you will have to learn to drop that intensity and that seeking.
Soul - I started my inward journey 11 years ago with such intensity until a year back, I drop my search cos I have explored enough dirt and also I no longer trust my mind. I stopped n jus wan to rest my mind and started meditation. Now with Sadhguru's help, I have found back my Energy and its something amazing that is not created by me, something wonderful as its both quiet my mind and gives me such joy and makes me laugh and followed by such feeling of Love, of completeness. Amazing.
Osho
Kabir drives the point deep into ur heart that first, a great flame-like desire is needed to be God. But then finally that very desire becomes the last barrier - that has to be dropped too. Once that is dropped and u are innocent, things start happening. The bud opens and becomes a flower, the caterpillar becomes a butterfly.
Soul - coincidentally, after using my blackberry for 1 year, tot of changing my wall paper n selected a beautiful butterfly cos I feel I have transformed from a caterpillar to a beautiful butterfly and I am flying. Amen.
Osho
Kabir asked student, where is God? Their answer, He is the breath inside the breath.
Soul - suddenly my tears welt, cos God is the breath inside my breath. When I breathe during Shoonya, I felt His silent breathe after mine and it connect me with Him. Amen.
Its now half an hour past, m stil silent, tears hovering in my eyes, m so grateful to connect wit Him.
Evenin
Jus finished sathsang wit Sadhguru. I m glad my faith in him was restored. My time spent in Ashram, stir me up cos our path is different.
My experience of Sadhguru is d same as in his videos.
Not sure why, suddenly there was a topic of laughter. Aha, he mentioned to live joyfully and its good that women can laugh. He cannot understand why some men don't want women to laugh. He wouldn't like to live with a woman who can't laugh.
I was already glad when he said that cos at least its ok that I can laugh.
Then he came out with the story of his grandmother n he said she was called a Devil of a woman cos she love to laugh n live to be 100 plus, outlived all her children and even some grandchildren. She also share food with animals. We'll, at least I fulfill one and m glad. At last I can laugh freely. Wit that I laugh openly. Just like in the Ashram, I realised in the whole sathsang, perhaps abt 600 meditators, I think I am one of the few that laugh.
Asia Works taught me is ok to cry
Isha Yoga taught me is ok to laugh.
When Sadhguru was talkin abt ok to laugh. I had flashback of my dad asking us to tone down the volume whenever he hear any commotion. He tot we were fighting. So, laughter, so called joyful noise was kept to a minimum.
I was sorry I snapped at the gal. She asked my why I laugh. She asked if I see any vision. I tot she is a regular meditator n she queried me. She then back off and told me she is new. So, I soften my tone to explain. She said she has done Shambavi n so far no such experience. I explained to her everyone is different. She don't have to compare. I told her jus continue doing and feel n experience her body.
When Sadhguru spoke abt the major event abt d dhayanalinga. He said he was excited n has not felt such excitement for past 20 years, I laugh.
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