Sadhguru
Your anger has nothing to do with anybody except yourself, only yourself.
Only because you believe your anger has something to do with somebody else, it keeps happening over and over again. If you see that it is only about you and you alone, it would not have lasted this long.
So being angry and upset about something, comes from a strong sense of like and dislike. This strong sense of like and dislike comes from a very deep identification with a certain way of thinking, of feeling, of life - which you think is the best way to live, to feel and think.
If someone is not in line with that, you get angry at those things.
As your likes and dislikes become stronger, as your identifications become stronger with one thing or another, all that you are doing is excluding existence.
If I say, "I like this very much", in a big way, I am excluding the rest of existence at that moment.
So, the stronger it becomes, the deeper the exclusion becomes.
The very process of liberation is to include, not to exclude.
In exclusion, you are trapped and separated.
In inclusion, you are liberated.
When everything, not just everything - when the whole existence is included in you, only then you are liberated.
Once you have disidentified with yourself, ur values, ur personality, u then become identified with the Universe.
So, anger is not the karma. Exclusion is the huge karma. It is because of exclusion that the anger overflows, because you have not included somebody or something as part of yourself.
Anger is just an indicator.
Soul - tot of d incident on the electrical failure. At first instance, I got angry at Admin for takin a trip while the maintenance is on, forcing me to do it. Then I tot of her salary vs the previous Admin - 50%, already very good vfm, so should not ask more and the anger died. Wasn't even angry when I had to stay till midnite and the electricity was out the next day and I got major scolding from boss.
When I decided reporting was of low value, I felt angry at having to do and hence was resentful. But once I lifted the VFM mode and acknowledge reporting is to be, I become liberated.
Now this communication of step by step, instructional - which I also viewed as low value and demeaning to me n to the other person make me less of a Communicator which I know I am. Apart from VFM mode, I guess my brain always accelerate skip and hence to do step by step comm, slows me down as I then need to fill in the gap. Mmm. Jus like my lesson now is to allow myself to feel the whole spectrum of emotion, including negative ones. Perhaps, I am also to learn to use the whole spectrum of my mind.
Father, am ready to remove the VFM mode, step by step commn is here to stay and I learned cos I wan to liberate myself.
Father, I have read this passage before but it never hit me. In understanding my boss as my mirror, I understand myself. Wil let go of my VFM mode that has done the filtering but grown to exclusion. Just like my boss uses her anger to get her way all to the top, but now it is the time to drop, but she is still holding on.
Let me have the awareness to drop the VFM mode. (Now perhaps this is what my Miser card is about)
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Both mind and emotion have great power and hence needs to be known and re-directed
Swami Rama (Bal Bhagawan)
When the senses are well controlled and withdrawn from contact with the objects of the world, then sense perception no longer create images in the mind. The mind is then trained in one-pointedness. When the mind no longer recalls thought-patterns from the unconscious, a balanced state of mind leads to a higher state of consciousness.
The practice of meditation and non-attachment are the two keynotes.
Intellect intervenes and blind emotion misguides. Though both are great power, they should be known first, analysed, and then directed towards the source of intuition. Intuition is the only source of true knowledge.
All this - whatever you see in the world - is unreal because of its constantly changing nature. Reality is hidden beneath all these changes.
Soul - Father, I was feeling bit fearful, tot of my boss's threatening stand. This is the first company that I m slightly fearful. I recalled I was bit fearful with my 2nd boss but later it was smooth all the way. My current boss always threaten people - no mistakes allowed.
Then I tot of their issue with their current major customer, the client always threaten to move the account to another competitor.
My boss always issuing threat and here we have the client doing the same thing.
First time, I feel fearful of making little mistakes. First time, I didn't speak out. First time I felt threatened. Alas I now knew what my ex-staff told me about their fear of their bosses. Something, which I have not been able to relate to, cos I am fearless with the bosses :)
Yea, first time I felt afraid. I wasn't even afraid of the bosses from hell.
Yea, alas for the first time, I felt fear, felt threatened by superior.
I am beginning to feel more spectrum of emotion. Bit scary, but God will never gives me anything I can't bear.
Below is my descent of my personality in work
Brash
Confidence
Resentment
Inadequate - reporting
Fearful
Humbled
Father, I now knew what they felt. It makes one afraid to be. I m never afraid at work, afraid only of snatch thief, afraid of falling in love n rejected. Perhaps that was d karma. To make me feel a spectrum of emotion. To balance my fear out to everything. I guess I have conquered reporting, my inadequacy and now to face my fear with my current boss. I guess part of my weakness in communication, was also due to apprehensivenes of my boss. Alas the fear is open.
Fear - a new emotion for me....
When the senses are well controlled and withdrawn from contact with the objects of the world, then sense perception no longer create images in the mind. The mind is then trained in one-pointedness. When the mind no longer recalls thought-patterns from the unconscious, a balanced state of mind leads to a higher state of consciousness.
The practice of meditation and non-attachment are the two keynotes.
Intellect intervenes and blind emotion misguides. Though both are great power, they should be known first, analysed, and then directed towards the source of intuition. Intuition is the only source of true knowledge.
All this - whatever you see in the world - is unreal because of its constantly changing nature. Reality is hidden beneath all these changes.
Soul - Father, I was feeling bit fearful, tot of my boss's threatening stand. This is the first company that I m slightly fearful. I recalled I was bit fearful with my 2nd boss but later it was smooth all the way. My current boss always threaten people - no mistakes allowed.
Then I tot of their issue with their current major customer, the client always threaten to move the account to another competitor.
My boss always issuing threat and here we have the client doing the same thing.
First time, I feel fearful of making little mistakes. First time, I didn't speak out. First time I felt threatened. Alas I now knew what my ex-staff told me about their fear of their bosses. Something, which I have not been able to relate to, cos I am fearless with the bosses :)
Yea, first time I felt afraid. I wasn't even afraid of the bosses from hell.
Yea, alas for the first time, I felt fear, felt threatened by superior.
I am beginning to feel more spectrum of emotion. Bit scary, but God will never gives me anything I can't bear.
Below is my descent of my personality in work
Brash
Confidence
Resentment
Inadequate - reporting
Fearful
Humbled
Father, I now knew what they felt. It makes one afraid to be. I m never afraid at work, afraid only of snatch thief, afraid of falling in love n rejected. Perhaps that was d karma. To make me feel a spectrum of emotion. To balance my fear out to everything. I guess I have conquered reporting, my inadequacy and now to face my fear with my current boss. I guess part of my weakness in communication, was also due to apprehensivenes of my boss. Alas the fear is open.
Fear - a new emotion for me....
Osho reading
The osho card for this week:
1. The Issue - Slowing down - do whatsoever you are doing, but at the deepest core, remain at ease, cool, calm, centred. We carry our home with us wherever we go. There is no need to seek shelter elsewhere and u develop Acceptance of What is.
Soul. - recalled my tot this morning and tot of using kriya to handle my external circumstances and my job is not me. Everywhere has its own issue, good and bad. Main thing was handling me.
2. Internal influence that I am unable to see - Possibilities. A world of possibilities is open to you. Because you have grown more loving towards yourself, more self-contained, you can work easily with others. Because you are relaxed and at ease, u can recognise possibilities as they present themselves.
Soul - not sure of what is the possibiliites but I know m more loving towards myself. Not judging myself. And for the first time changed "rejection" into "separation". There is no rejection.
3. External influence that you are aware - Maturity. Wherever you are, it will be there and the flowers continue to shower on you. This is spiritual spring. The inner being is filled with flowers - that carry the quality of springtime and regenerate wherever he goes.
He can move in any directions. It makes no difference as his joy and maturity cannot be diminished by externals. He has come to a time of centredness and expansiveness - the white glow around the figure is his protection and his light. All of life's experiences has brought him to this time of perfection. When u draw this card, this moment carries the gift for hard work well done. Your base is solid now and success and good fortune are yours for they are the outcome of what has already been experienced within.
Soul - when my inner eye first open, it will be orange in colour n then later changed to white glow. I always felt at ease n blissful when I am in the white light n my laughter jus bubbled. Amen.
As for d maturity, when my boss was scolding me for d electricity, me ego said why do we need to bear this. We already don't like the job n with such ungrateful n unreasonable boss, it just tilt me over. I really wanted to quit n tot that last day end june with 3 mths notice. But 2nd tot came in that my Finance Mgr is comin in and hence i cannot leave just yet.
4. What is needed for resolution - Turning in - turning inwards is not a turning at all. You have been runnung and running and you have been coming again and again to frustation When u finally know each desire bring you misery, u may wan to stop. But stopping also is running, in a subtle way. Any effort is going.
When going stops, journeying disappears; when desiring is no more clouding your mind, you are in. This is called turning in. It is not turning at all, it is simply not going out.
Jus watch ur tots as if they were traffic on the road or ripples on the surface of pond; it goes up n down, good n bad, happy or sad, trying to get ur attention and seduce you into a game.
Meditation is jus watching the mind, as if the mind belongs to somebody else.
You are now ready to take this distance now, to watch the show without being caught in the drama. Indulge urself in the simple freedom of Turning in, whenever you can and the knack of meditation will grow and deepen in you.
Soul - yea, will turn in. No running away or running to. Both good n bad are the same, all games. The good can turn into bad and the bad can be a blessing.
5. The resolution - Miser card. This card challenges us to look at what we are clinging to and what we feel we possess that is so valuable that it needs to be protected.
Soul - when I read this card yday, I tot of past achievement. Jus now I tot me wishing for my ex Management Team. While we do disagree, at least the comm is easy. Me, clinging on to my style of commn, my smartness, not willing to share or instruct.
Yeah, it took me so long to come into this commn style of using perhaps n maybe n not be directive. This is the indirect style but her comm is direct.
Yeah, good for me to see my boss being so horrid. Perhaps is good I saw her horrid side, of how nasty she can be. I emphatise with her PA. She is being paid a premium to face the nastiness. And she pay d price by being nasty to others. I encounter it yday, she threw on me. For me, I didn't throw .
For me, jus remember my days of glory are over. Or rather days whereby I can communicate using my current style is over.
1. The Issue - Slowing down - do whatsoever you are doing, but at the deepest core, remain at ease, cool, calm, centred. We carry our home with us wherever we go. There is no need to seek shelter elsewhere and u develop Acceptance of What is.
Soul. - recalled my tot this morning and tot of using kriya to handle my external circumstances and my job is not me. Everywhere has its own issue, good and bad. Main thing was handling me.
2. Internal influence that I am unable to see - Possibilities. A world of possibilities is open to you. Because you have grown more loving towards yourself, more self-contained, you can work easily with others. Because you are relaxed and at ease, u can recognise possibilities as they present themselves.
Soul - not sure of what is the possibiliites but I know m more loving towards myself. Not judging myself. And for the first time changed "rejection" into "separation". There is no rejection.
3. External influence that you are aware - Maturity. Wherever you are, it will be there and the flowers continue to shower on you. This is spiritual spring. The inner being is filled with flowers - that carry the quality of springtime and regenerate wherever he goes.
He can move in any directions. It makes no difference as his joy and maturity cannot be diminished by externals. He has come to a time of centredness and expansiveness - the white glow around the figure is his protection and his light. All of life's experiences has brought him to this time of perfection. When u draw this card, this moment carries the gift for hard work well done. Your base is solid now and success and good fortune are yours for they are the outcome of what has already been experienced within.
Soul - when my inner eye first open, it will be orange in colour n then later changed to white glow. I always felt at ease n blissful when I am in the white light n my laughter jus bubbled. Amen.
As for d maturity, when my boss was scolding me for d electricity, me ego said why do we need to bear this. We already don't like the job n with such ungrateful n unreasonable boss, it just tilt me over. I really wanted to quit n tot that last day end june with 3 mths notice. But 2nd tot came in that my Finance Mgr is comin in and hence i cannot leave just yet.
4. What is needed for resolution - Turning in - turning inwards is not a turning at all. You have been runnung and running and you have been coming again and again to frustation When u finally know each desire bring you misery, u may wan to stop. But stopping also is running, in a subtle way. Any effort is going.
When going stops, journeying disappears; when desiring is no more clouding your mind, you are in. This is called turning in. It is not turning at all, it is simply not going out.
Jus watch ur tots as if they were traffic on the road or ripples on the surface of pond; it goes up n down, good n bad, happy or sad, trying to get ur attention and seduce you into a game.
Meditation is jus watching the mind, as if the mind belongs to somebody else.
You are now ready to take this distance now, to watch the show without being caught in the drama. Indulge urself in the simple freedom of Turning in, whenever you can and the knack of meditation will grow and deepen in you.
Soul - yea, will turn in. No running away or running to. Both good n bad are the same, all games. The good can turn into bad and the bad can be a blessing.
5. The resolution - Miser card. This card challenges us to look at what we are clinging to and what we feel we possess that is so valuable that it needs to be protected.
Soul - when I read this card yday, I tot of past achievement. Jus now I tot me wishing for my ex Management Team. While we do disagree, at least the comm is easy. Me, clinging on to my style of commn, my smartness, not willing to share or instruct.
Yeah, it took me so long to come into this commn style of using perhaps n maybe n not be directive. This is the indirect style but her comm is direct.
Yeah, good for me to see my boss being so horrid. Perhaps is good I saw her horrid side, of how nasty she can be. I emphatise with her PA. She is being paid a premium to face the nastiness. And she pay d price by being nasty to others. I encounter it yday, she threw on me. For me, I didn't throw .
For me, jus remember my days of glory are over. Or rather days whereby I can communicate using my current style is over.
Self Discipline in the Path; 2 Different Paths
Swami Rama
Self discipline is very important in the path of spirituality. Becoming a monk or swami is not so important. What is important is to accept self-disciplined life. There needs to be a bridge between life within and without.
Discipline is the foundation of that bridge. People should not be tempted by mere techniques, but learn to cultivate discipline within themselves. Cultivation of a new mind is a necessary step for enlightenment.
Possible distractions will be there. Decide that no matter what happens, you will do what you set out to do. You cannot change your circumstances, the world or your society to suit you. But if you have the strength and determination, you can go through this procession of life successfully.
Soul - M trying. At least I am slowly getting used to the morning meditation. In d evening, I do when I have the need to.
Swami Rama
There is 2 path to enlightenment:
1. Renunciation
2. Action
The path of action is doing action selflessly and skillfully, living in the world yet remaining above.
The path of renuciation is to be free from all the charms, temptations and attractions of the world.
Both paths are blessed.
The path of action furnishes the means of living, but is also time consuming. In the path of renunciation, there is ample time for spiritual practices, but limited means like food, shelter and clothing.
It is not important which path one follows. What is important is the honesty, sincerity, truthfulness and faithfulness which one has in either path.
The path of renunciation - sacrifice
The path of action - conquest.
Non attachment is like a fire that burns the binding power of past samskaras.
Non attachment does not mean indifference or non-loving. Non-attachment and love are one and the same.
Non attachment gives freedom but attachment brings bondage.
Thru non attachment, the householder remains aware of his purpose of life and does his duty selflessly. His actions becomes means for him
In renunciation, the renunciate remains aware of the purpose of his life constantly and attains enlightenment.
Non attachment and renunciation expand the consciousness.
Practice not worrying about success or failure, but paid attention to the work at hand without feeling the slightest anxiety or fatique.
When an individual learns to expand his consciousness or unites with the universal consciousness, then he no longer remains within the bounds of his karma.
Self discipline is very important in the path of spirituality. Becoming a monk or swami is not so important. What is important is to accept self-disciplined life. There needs to be a bridge between life within and without.
Discipline is the foundation of that bridge. People should not be tempted by mere techniques, but learn to cultivate discipline within themselves. Cultivation of a new mind is a necessary step for enlightenment.
Possible distractions will be there. Decide that no matter what happens, you will do what you set out to do. You cannot change your circumstances, the world or your society to suit you. But if you have the strength and determination, you can go through this procession of life successfully.
Soul - M trying. At least I am slowly getting used to the morning meditation. In d evening, I do when I have the need to.
Swami Rama
There is 2 path to enlightenment:
1. Renunciation
2. Action
The path of action is doing action selflessly and skillfully, living in the world yet remaining above.
The path of renuciation is to be free from all the charms, temptations and attractions of the world.
Both paths are blessed.
The path of action furnishes the means of living, but is also time consuming. In the path of renunciation, there is ample time for spiritual practices, but limited means like food, shelter and clothing.
It is not important which path one follows. What is important is the honesty, sincerity, truthfulness and faithfulness which one has in either path.
The path of renunciation - sacrifice
The path of action - conquest.
Non attachment is like a fire that burns the binding power of past samskaras.
Non attachment does not mean indifference or non-loving. Non-attachment and love are one and the same.
Non attachment gives freedom but attachment brings bondage.
Thru non attachment, the householder remains aware of his purpose of life and does his duty selflessly. His actions becomes means for him
In renunciation, the renunciate remains aware of the purpose of his life constantly and attains enlightenment.
Non attachment and renunciation expand the consciousness.
Practice not worrying about success or failure, but paid attention to the work at hand without feeling the slightest anxiety or fatique.
When an individual learns to expand his consciousness or unites with the universal consciousness, then he no longer remains within the bounds of his karma.
Courage required in the Spiritual Evolution
Sri Aurobindo
The work of the seeker is therefore not so much a negative work of scouring the Subconscient, as a positive one of calling down the Light; he precipitates down the vibrations of the Future to accelerate the cleansing process; the depth cease to be the depths.
The conditions of the age of Truth may seem severe - the perilous descent into the Inconscient, the battle against the Shadow, the ominous Death. But have we not risked our lives for more futile endeavours? Man's greatness is not in what he is, but in what he makes possible.
If we conquer here, we conquer everywhere, we are the deliverers of the dead, we are the deliverers of life.
By becoming conscious, each of us becomes a builder of heaven and redeemer of the earth.
Our shadows and declines are always the gestation of a greater light, which needed to descend in order to break the limits, through an excess of light or an excess of shadow; but the one precipitates our darkness into the light dissolves it, while the other precipitates the light into our darkness and transmute it.
The one delivers a few individuals, while the others liberates the whole earth.
It is not our materialism that is the bronze door ; but it is the huge spiritual carapace under which we have buried the Spirit.
The real device of the devil is not to lay hold of falsehood or hatred and sow them throughout the world - he is much to clever for that. - but to lay hold of a bit of true truth and to twist it a little. Nothing is harder than perveted truth: the falsehood inherits all the power of the truth it imprisons. We have been told again and again that salvation is in heaven - and that is true, there is no salvation for man so long as he has his nose buried in Matter.
His salvation is in the superconscious heaven and we probably need to be preached heaven so as to be pulled out of our first evolutionary matrix, animal and economic - but that is only a first stage evolution, which we unfortunately has turned into a final goal, as hard as stone. And now this goal is turning against us. We have denied the Divinity in Matter to confine it in our holy places.
We have swing from one pole to the other - from material enjoyment to spiritual austerity, without ever finding our plenitude.
We have replaced true power with devices and true wisdom with dogmas. This the reign of the gnomes, on every plane. And it will continue, unless we give up those mortifying half truths, from above or below and plunge into the true source, Within to recoverr the pratical secret of the Spirit in Matter.
Humanity has to descend the dark curve of the age of reason and religions, so that all grown human beings may recover the Secret in themselves, and the light everywhere, under all the darkness, all the misery, all the pettiness, instead of a high brazier in some Vedic or Iranian sanctuary.
We are at the beginning of Time.
The course of evolution is not to shoot up, increasingly sublime and dissolving, it is spiral : It is NOT a tortuous path leading us back, a little battered, to the starting point : it is, on the contrary, to teach the whole creation the joy of being, the beauty of being, the greatness n perpetual development of being. Then everything has being.
Soul - Thanks for giving me back my faith. For a time before yoga kriya, I thought I was back to square 1.
The work of the seeker is therefore not so much a negative work of scouring the Subconscient, as a positive one of calling down the Light; he precipitates down the vibrations of the Future to accelerate the cleansing process; the depth cease to be the depths.
The conditions of the age of Truth may seem severe - the perilous descent into the Inconscient, the battle against the Shadow, the ominous Death. But have we not risked our lives for more futile endeavours? Man's greatness is not in what he is, but in what he makes possible.
If we conquer here, we conquer everywhere, we are the deliverers of the dead, we are the deliverers of life.
By becoming conscious, each of us becomes a builder of heaven and redeemer of the earth.
Our shadows and declines are always the gestation of a greater light, which needed to descend in order to break the limits, through an excess of light or an excess of shadow; but the one precipitates our darkness into the light dissolves it, while the other precipitates the light into our darkness and transmute it.
The one delivers a few individuals, while the others liberates the whole earth.
It is not our materialism that is the bronze door ; but it is the huge spiritual carapace under which we have buried the Spirit.
The real device of the devil is not to lay hold of falsehood or hatred and sow them throughout the world - he is much to clever for that. - but to lay hold of a bit of true truth and to twist it a little. Nothing is harder than perveted truth: the falsehood inherits all the power of the truth it imprisons. We have been told again and again that salvation is in heaven - and that is true, there is no salvation for man so long as he has his nose buried in Matter.
His salvation is in the superconscious heaven and we probably need to be preached heaven so as to be pulled out of our first evolutionary matrix, animal and economic - but that is only a first stage evolution, which we unfortunately has turned into a final goal, as hard as stone. And now this goal is turning against us. We have denied the Divinity in Matter to confine it in our holy places.
We have swing from one pole to the other - from material enjoyment to spiritual austerity, without ever finding our plenitude.
We have replaced true power with devices and true wisdom with dogmas. This the reign of the gnomes, on every plane. And it will continue, unless we give up those mortifying half truths, from above or below and plunge into the true source, Within to recoverr the pratical secret of the Spirit in Matter.
Humanity has to descend the dark curve of the age of reason and religions, so that all grown human beings may recover the Secret in themselves, and the light everywhere, under all the darkness, all the misery, all the pettiness, instead of a high brazier in some Vedic or Iranian sanctuary.
We are at the beginning of Time.
The course of evolution is not to shoot up, increasingly sublime and dissolving, it is spiral : It is NOT a tortuous path leading us back, a little battered, to the starting point : it is, on the contrary, to teach the whole creation the joy of being, the beauty of being, the greatness n perpetual development of being. Then everything has being.
Soul - Thanks for giving me back my faith. For a time before yoga kriya, I thought I was back to square 1.
Spiritual War
Sri Aurobindo
To help humanity out, it is not enough for an individual, however great, to achieve ultimate solution individually, because even when the Light is ready to descend, It cannot come to stay till the lower plane is also ready to bear the pressure of the Descent.
If you walked the path, without having the patience to wait for the rest of the creation, you will not have real transformation in the outer world.
The spiritual life finds its most potent expression in the man who lives the ordinary life of men in the strength of the Yoga. It is by such a union of the inner life and the outer that mankind will eventually be lifted up and become mighty and divine.
Ashram
Everyone can play d role they want in the Ashram. There was no difference among the baker, teacher, musician and etc and none was remunerated, nor was one considered superior to another.
The only real work was to discover the truth of one's being, for which, the other outer work was only a mean. The people also change activities as the consciousness awakened; very soon, all the values attached to former professions fell away, and since money no longer had any meaning, one who tot he was a doctor found himself more comfortable as an artisan, while an average man suddenly showed talent for painting or poetry or immensed himself in the study of Sanskrit or Ayurvedic medicine.
It was a complete recasting of outer values according to the sole inner criterion.
When a disciple one day asked Mother abt the best way of collaborating in the supramental transformation. Mother replied, "It is always the same thing; realise your own being, in whatever form, by whatever means - it doesn't matter. That is the only way.
Each individual carries in himself a truth and it is with this truth that he must unite, this truth that he must live.
That way, the path he follows to join with and realise this truth is also the path that will bring him the closest possitble to the Transformation.
In another words, the two are inseparably connected : the personal realisation and transformation.
It may even be this multiplicity of approaches that will yield the Secret and open the door, who knows?
Soul - thank you for keeping me feel sane. What is my truth? Everyone deserves a chance to know who they are. To know how best they can grow. To be the beautiful person that they are. Everyone deserve a guide, a helping hand. I want to help to liberate others, as I have been liberated. I don't want to be in Ashram to guide, I want to be in the world.
Sri Aurobindo
An "ashram" is wherever in the world people believe in a truer life, whether they know Sri or not, because their inner orientation or will represents a type of concentration or need that automatically places them in the crucible.
Transformation is not anyone's prerogative; on the contrary, it requires many people, as diverse as possible.
It is not with saintliness that we make a vaccine, but with the share of human disease we have the courage to take upon ourselves.
Each individual has a shadow that pursues him and seems to contradict the goal of his life.
Accepting life, the seeker of I
Integral Yoga has to bear not only his own burden, but a great part of the world's burden too along with it, as a continuation of his own sufficiently heavy load. Therefore his Yoga has much more of the nature of a battle than others' ; hence it is not an individual battle, but it is a collective war.
He not only has to conquer his own disorder, but to conquer them as representatives of the same adverse and inexhaustible forces in the world.
Often when he finds that even after he has won persistently his own personal battle, he has still to win it over and over again in a seemingly interminable war, because his inner existence has already been so enlarged that not only it contains his own being with its well defined needs and experiences, but is in soladarity with the being of others, because in him, contains the universe.
To help humanity out, it is not enough for an individual, however great, to achieve ultimate solution individually, because even when the Light is ready to descend, It cannot come to stay till the lower plane is also ready to bear the pressure of the Descent.
If you walked the path, without having the patience to wait for the rest of the creation, you will not have real transformation in the outer world.
The spiritual life finds its most potent expression in the man who lives the ordinary life of men in the strength of the Yoga. It is by such a union of the inner life and the outer that mankind will eventually be lifted up and become mighty and divine.
Ashram
Everyone can play d role they want in the Ashram. There was no difference among the baker, teacher, musician and etc and none was remunerated, nor was one considered superior to another.
The only real work was to discover the truth of one's being, for which, the other outer work was only a mean. The people also change activities as the consciousness awakened; very soon, all the values attached to former professions fell away, and since money no longer had any meaning, one who tot he was a doctor found himself more comfortable as an artisan, while an average man suddenly showed talent for painting or poetry or immensed himself in the study of Sanskrit or Ayurvedic medicine.
It was a complete recasting of outer values according to the sole inner criterion.
When a disciple one day asked Mother abt the best way of collaborating in the supramental transformation. Mother replied, "It is always the same thing; realise your own being, in whatever form, by whatever means - it doesn't matter. That is the only way.
Each individual carries in himself a truth and it is with this truth that he must unite, this truth that he must live.
That way, the path he follows to join with and realise this truth is also the path that will bring him the closest possitble to the Transformation.
In another words, the two are inseparably connected : the personal realisation and transformation.
It may even be this multiplicity of approaches that will yield the Secret and open the door, who knows?
Soul - thank you for keeping me feel sane. What is my truth? Everyone deserves a chance to know who they are. To know how best they can grow. To be the beautiful person that they are. Everyone deserve a guide, a helping hand. I want to help to liberate others, as I have been liberated. I don't want to be in Ashram to guide, I want to be in the world.
Sri Aurobindo
An "ashram" is wherever in the world people believe in a truer life, whether they know Sri or not, because their inner orientation or will represents a type of concentration or need that automatically places them in the crucible.
Transformation is not anyone's prerogative; on the contrary, it requires many people, as diverse as possible.
It is not with saintliness that we make a vaccine, but with the share of human disease we have the courage to take upon ourselves.
Each individual has a shadow that pursues him and seems to contradict the goal of his life.
Accepting life, the seeker of I
Integral Yoga has to bear not only his own burden, but a great part of the world's burden too along with it, as a continuation of his own sufficiently heavy load. Therefore his Yoga has much more of the nature of a battle than others' ; hence it is not an individual battle, but it is a collective war.
He not only has to conquer his own disorder, but to conquer them as representatives of the same adverse and inexhaustible forces in the world.
Often when he finds that even after he has won persistently his own personal battle, he has still to win it over and over again in a seemingly interminable war, because his inner existence has already been so enlarged that not only it contains his own being with its well defined needs and experiences, but is in soladarity with the being of others, because in him, contains the universe.
Endless digging
Sri Aurobindo
The higher we rise, the lower we are pulled down.
Evolution does not rise higher and higher, into an ever more heavenly heaven, but deeper and deeper.
If one pulls down a slightly strong light, all the darkness below groans, violated.
And the battle seems endless. One digs and digs, the more the bottom seem to recede. And if it there were not the strength and Ananda, it would be harassing and disgusting work.
The more light we have, the more darkness we discover. Night after night, we track down the surreptitious rot that undermines Life - how could we transform anything as long as the necrosis is here?
And since by now, our mind and vital are too well established in the truth, too clear to be attacked by these subterranean forces, it is the body that suffers, for it is the last den of the Fatherhood.
At the very bottom, beyond disorders, beyond fear - the great Fear presiding in the depths - we find an immense Weariness, something that refuses, that say NO to all this pain of living, this rape of light.
We sense that going down there, to the end of this NO, we would simply melt into a great release of stone, as the ecstasy above was a great release of Light.
Death is not the opposite of Life!
Death is the reverside of, or the door to, the luminious Superconscient - at the end of the NO, there is a Yes and again YES, which pushes us into one body after another, again and again, to find the hoy.
Death is nothing but the regret of this Yes. The great Weariness at the very bottom, a travesty of this bilss. It is the obscure release of a body that has not yet found the luminious release of eternal joy
When the body finds this ecstasy, this immensity of light and joy deep within its own flesh, as well as above, it will no longer need to die.
Soul - I have experienced the endless digging n wonder where it will end. Wonder how much fear is there in me. It is very tiring and alone cos no one can relate why we push ourselves through all the lessons. It is because I have experienced Love beyond every little fear, that I continued ploughing. I admit I was feeling tired after more than 10 years of ploughing n was abt to give up, to be status quo and joined the world in suffering, too tired to liberate myself further. Also, I reached the fear of my mind and didn't know how to reach beyond my mind's fear. God must have heard my prayer and send me to my current employment and throw me to another bottom but yet saved me with yoga kriya.
The higher we rise, the lower we are pulled down.
Evolution does not rise higher and higher, into an ever more heavenly heaven, but deeper and deeper.
If one pulls down a slightly strong light, all the darkness below groans, violated.
And the battle seems endless. One digs and digs, the more the bottom seem to recede. And if it there were not the strength and Ananda, it would be harassing and disgusting work.
The more light we have, the more darkness we discover. Night after night, we track down the surreptitious rot that undermines Life - how could we transform anything as long as the necrosis is here?
And since by now, our mind and vital are too well established in the truth, too clear to be attacked by these subterranean forces, it is the body that suffers, for it is the last den of the Fatherhood.
At the very bottom, beyond disorders, beyond fear - the great Fear presiding in the depths - we find an immense Weariness, something that refuses, that say NO to all this pain of living, this rape of light.
We sense that going down there, to the end of this NO, we would simply melt into a great release of stone, as the ecstasy above was a great release of Light.
Death is not the opposite of Life!
Death is the reverside of, or the door to, the luminious Superconscient - at the end of the NO, there is a Yes and again YES, which pushes us into one body after another, again and again, to find the hoy.
Death is nothing but the regret of this Yes. The great Weariness at the very bottom, a travesty of this bilss. It is the obscure release of a body that has not yet found the luminious release of eternal joy
When the body finds this ecstasy, this immensity of light and joy deep within its own flesh, as well as above, it will no longer need to die.
Soul - I have experienced the endless digging n wonder where it will end. Wonder how much fear is there in me. It is very tiring and alone cos no one can relate why we push ourselves through all the lessons. It is because I have experienced Love beyond every little fear, that I continued ploughing. I admit I was feeling tired after more than 10 years of ploughing n was abt to give up, to be status quo and joined the world in suffering, too tired to liberate myself further. Also, I reached the fear of my mind and didn't know how to reach beyond my mind's fear. God must have heard my prayer and send me to my current employment and throw me to another bottom but yet saved me with yoga kriya.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Spiritual journey is not only upward and instead it is both upward and downward
Sri Aurobindo
Everything has its inevitable place and not only nothing can be cut out, but perhaps nothing is more important or less important.
Each stumbling lights up a flame of suffering and, as it were, bores an opening of light down below; each weakness is a call for strength, as if the force of the fall were the very force of the ruse; each imperfection is a hollow for rounded fullness - there is no sins, no errors, only infinite miseries that compel us to explore the full expanse of our kingdom and to embrace everything in order to heal everything and fulfill everything.
Through a crack in our armor, a love and pity for the world have entered, which none of our radiant purities can ever understand - purity is impregnable, it is barricaded, sealed like a concrete; a gap is needed for the Truth to come in!
Soul - Father, thank you for restoring my faith. Its been awhile but I am back. This past 10 mth has been a test on my gap. I have seldom allowed my weakness to be expressed - emotion, work.
I used to take pride that I don't have to care or work on my weakness cos I am confident of my strength.
In reality, I didn't have to work on it cos I never let it come out, so how to work. Real confidence wld be allow the weakness to be shown n accepted.
So now that I faced n finally accept my strength, I find myself humbled and more emphatetic of others whose weakness r my strength. I also find myself loving myself cos by accepting my weakness
Thru this all, I finally faced my weakness.
Sri Aurobindo
There is a truth of Love behind evil
As if all this Shadow had been needed so that Love may be born.
Once we have suffered all and understood all, we r to incarnate perfect Love and Joy.
Soul - yeah, agreed as I always believe evil is just fear and behind fear is love.
Below is what I know;
1. Anger
2. Hurt
3. Guilt
4. Fear
5. Love
Me allowing my weakness make me feel more loving towards myself. Since I finally allow my weakness, I think I then too can allow for other weakness - being loving.
Sri Aurobindo
The law of descent is not the a law of sin or fall or repentance. It is a Premeditation that pulls us downward and upward at the same time.
As we advance, the superconscient line recedes upward, while the subsconscient line recedes downward. Everything is broadened and illumined.
The nearer we draw to the Summit, the more we touch the Bottom.
Soul - At first, with my pride I tot the spiritual journey is to go upward towards heaven. Then I discover that there is a dark side that we need to pass thru in order to reach heaven. So, I preserve in all my lessons/challenges and overcome my fear. It wasn't easy and I did succeed. But then I realised the lesson is neverending depth and I become tired. The one lesson that always elude me is non acknowledgement of weakness n has gone on for couple of years. I wasn't able to find any answer and began to despair.
After I found n practice yoga kriya, I become more sensitive n miserable. I began to wonder abt this path n was thinking if I am sinful and God was punishing me and if this spiritual journey is not heavenward but repentance n found myself even more sadder n clamouring to find a way out of my misery.
Alas, God send me Sri Aurobindo to inform me that the spiritual journey is not upward and infact it is both upward and downward.
Sadhguru also said a true seeker's goal is to annihilate himself n hence would welcome downward turn evenmore.
I also gather from Sri Aurobindo that the upward and downward (ascent and descent) is to enable an expansion of self to become a Self n be more Loving.
When we hide our weakness, we become smaller than we actually are.
When we show our weakness, we expanded and become bigger.
Everything has its inevitable place and not only nothing can be cut out, but perhaps nothing is more important or less important.
Each stumbling lights up a flame of suffering and, as it were, bores an opening of light down below; each weakness is a call for strength, as if the force of the fall were the very force of the ruse; each imperfection is a hollow for rounded fullness - there is no sins, no errors, only infinite miseries that compel us to explore the full expanse of our kingdom and to embrace everything in order to heal everything and fulfill everything.
Through a crack in our armor, a love and pity for the world have entered, which none of our radiant purities can ever understand - purity is impregnable, it is barricaded, sealed like a concrete; a gap is needed for the Truth to come in!
Soul - Father, thank you for restoring my faith. Its been awhile but I am back. This past 10 mth has been a test on my gap. I have seldom allowed my weakness to be expressed - emotion, work.
I used to take pride that I don't have to care or work on my weakness cos I am confident of my strength.
In reality, I didn't have to work on it cos I never let it come out, so how to work. Real confidence wld be allow the weakness to be shown n accepted.
So now that I faced n finally accept my strength, I find myself humbled and more emphatetic of others whose weakness r my strength. I also find myself loving myself cos by accepting my weakness
Thru this all, I finally faced my weakness.
Sri Aurobindo
There is a truth of Love behind evil
As if all this Shadow had been needed so that Love may be born.
Once we have suffered all and understood all, we r to incarnate perfect Love and Joy.
Soul - yeah, agreed as I always believe evil is just fear and behind fear is love.
Below is what I know;
1. Anger
2. Hurt
3. Guilt
4. Fear
5. Love
Me allowing my weakness make me feel more loving towards myself. Since I finally allow my weakness, I think I then too can allow for other weakness - being loving.
Sri Aurobindo
The law of descent is not the a law of sin or fall or repentance. It is a Premeditation that pulls us downward and upward at the same time.
As we advance, the superconscient line recedes upward, while the subsconscient line recedes downward. Everything is broadened and illumined.
The nearer we draw to the Summit, the more we touch the Bottom.
Soul - At first, with my pride I tot the spiritual journey is to go upward towards heaven. Then I discover that there is a dark side that we need to pass thru in order to reach heaven. So, I preserve in all my lessons/challenges and overcome my fear. It wasn't easy and I did succeed. But then I realised the lesson is neverending depth and I become tired. The one lesson that always elude me is non acknowledgement of weakness n has gone on for couple of years. I wasn't able to find any answer and began to despair.
After I found n practice yoga kriya, I become more sensitive n miserable. I began to wonder abt this path n was thinking if I am sinful and God was punishing me and if this spiritual journey is not heavenward but repentance n found myself even more sadder n clamouring to find a way out of my misery.
Alas, God send me Sri Aurobindo to inform me that the spiritual journey is not upward and infact it is both upward and downward.
Sadhguru also said a true seeker's goal is to annihilate himself n hence would welcome downward turn evenmore.
I also gather from Sri Aurobindo that the upward and downward (ascent and descent) is to enable an expansion of self to become a Self n be more Loving.
When we hide our weakness, we become smaller than we actually are.
When we show our weakness, we expanded and become bigger.
Even the downward spiral is a also path towards spirituality
Sri Aurobindo
If we r more divine that we think because of the superconscious future that pulls us, we are also more beastlike than we imagine because of the subsconscient and inconscient past that drags us down.
This double mistery holds the key to the Secret. None can reach heaven who has not passed through hell.
The integral seeker is meant neither for the dark night nor the blinding light. Wherever he goes, he must see - this is the first stage of mastery.
For we do not seek to "pass on" to a better existence, but to transform this one.
For we are the field of this battle - all those worlds meet within us, from the highest to the lowest. There is no point in running away, holding our noses or crossing ourselves, we must enter the battlefield and conquer :
"He too must carry the yoke he came to unloose;
He too must bear the pang that he would heal"
Soul - Father, this msg is asking me to stay n conquer; the same as the courage; Professionaly, since I asked for change of Finance Mgr, I shld follow thru. Yea, suddenly tot instead of lamenting what I don't have n what I have to endure, at least acknowledge the blessing that my boss likes me despite thinking m average, not clear thinking. I have a Regional CFO who likes me. I do have a good team and there is opportunity to change d FM, just like I have changed d Admin.
Sri Aurobindo
You must know the whole before you can know the part and the highest before you can truly understand the lowest.
We r NOT meant to keep looking back, but to look ahead and above in the superconscious light, because there is our future, only the future can explain and heal the past.
Instead of looking at these sharp turns as a sort of fatality, the seeker will make them the basis of his work.
This twofold movement of ascent and descent is the fundamental process of integral yoga. On each height we conquer, we have to turn to bring down its power and its illumination into lower mortal movement.
Such is the price of transforming life, otherwise, we go on poeticising and spiritualising on the peaks, while underneath the old life keeps bumping along.
In practice, the downward movement is not effected by the arbitrary decision of the mind - the less the mind interferes, the better.
The process of yoga is in a spiral movement and not in a straight line.
"The hidden foe lodged in the human breast
Man must overcome or miss his higher fate
This is inner war without escape.
As long as we reject one for the other, we will fail miserably and will miss the goal of existence.
The practical beginning of the Secret is first become aware, then to see that each thing in this world, even the most grotesque or far-wandering error, contain a spark of truth beneath the veil because everything here below is God moving on in search of himself.
If the seeker accepts to through the corresponding degree below, without cutting anything, so as to deliver there the same Light hidden under every mask, element and darkest mud, he will gradually see everything grow clear before his eyes, not theoretically but tangibly and will discover not only summits but vast abysses of Truth.
He will see that the Foe was the most diligent collaborator, most attentive to the perfect solidity of his realisation.
Firstly, each battle increased his strength and then because each fall has forced him to deliver the truth below instead of fleeing alone to vacous summits.
He will see that his Burden was the very burden of our Mother, the Earth.
Soul - I have read this before n now back to this chapter. Yea, looked within.
This msg is asking me to go thru the Burden for my spiritual enligthenment. This is the core of Sufferingisblessing.
Will stay till the end.
There are 2 ways of meeting difficulties. You alter the difficulties or you alter yourself to meet the difficulties.
If we r more divine that we think because of the superconscious future that pulls us, we are also more beastlike than we imagine because of the subsconscient and inconscient past that drags us down.
This double mistery holds the key to the Secret. None can reach heaven who has not passed through hell.
The integral seeker is meant neither for the dark night nor the blinding light. Wherever he goes, he must see - this is the first stage of mastery.
For we do not seek to "pass on" to a better existence, but to transform this one.
For we are the field of this battle - all those worlds meet within us, from the highest to the lowest. There is no point in running away, holding our noses or crossing ourselves, we must enter the battlefield and conquer :
"He too must carry the yoke he came to unloose;
He too must bear the pang that he would heal"
Soul - Father, this msg is asking me to stay n conquer; the same as the courage; Professionaly, since I asked for change of Finance Mgr, I shld follow thru. Yea, suddenly tot instead of lamenting what I don't have n what I have to endure, at least acknowledge the blessing that my boss likes me despite thinking m average, not clear thinking. I have a Regional CFO who likes me. I do have a good team and there is opportunity to change d FM, just like I have changed d Admin.
Sri Aurobindo
You must know the whole before you can know the part and the highest before you can truly understand the lowest.
We r NOT meant to keep looking back, but to look ahead and above in the superconscious light, because there is our future, only the future can explain and heal the past.
Instead of looking at these sharp turns as a sort of fatality, the seeker will make them the basis of his work.
This twofold movement of ascent and descent is the fundamental process of integral yoga. On each height we conquer, we have to turn to bring down its power and its illumination into lower mortal movement.
Such is the price of transforming life, otherwise, we go on poeticising and spiritualising on the peaks, while underneath the old life keeps bumping along.
In practice, the downward movement is not effected by the arbitrary decision of the mind - the less the mind interferes, the better.
The process of yoga is in a spiral movement and not in a straight line.
"The hidden foe lodged in the human breast
Man must overcome or miss his higher fate
This is inner war without escape.
As long as we reject one for the other, we will fail miserably and will miss the goal of existence.
The practical beginning of the Secret is first become aware, then to see that each thing in this world, even the most grotesque or far-wandering error, contain a spark of truth beneath the veil because everything here below is God moving on in search of himself.
If the seeker accepts to through the corresponding degree below, without cutting anything, so as to deliver there the same Light hidden under every mask, element and darkest mud, he will gradually see everything grow clear before his eyes, not theoretically but tangibly and will discover not only summits but vast abysses of Truth.
He will see that the Foe was the most diligent collaborator, most attentive to the perfect solidity of his realisation.
Firstly, each battle increased his strength and then because each fall has forced him to deliver the truth below instead of fleeing alone to vacous summits.
He will see that his Burden was the very burden of our Mother, the Earth.
Soul - I have read this before n now back to this chapter. Yea, looked within.
This msg is asking me to go thru the Burden for my spiritual enligthenment. This is the core of Sufferingisblessing.
Will stay till the end.
There are 2 ways of meeting difficulties. You alter the difficulties or you alter yourself to meet the difficulties.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
None can reach heaven who has not passed through hell.
Sri Aurobindo
None can reach heaven who has not passed through hell.
For descent is commensurate with ascent; we cannot descend lower than we have ascended, because the force needed to descend is the very force needed to ascend. This is a fundamental psychological law no one can escape
We cannot heal unless we heal all the way down and we cannot go all the way down unless we go all the way up. The deeper we want to descend, the more powerful the light we need, otherwise we are eaten alive.
Soul - true, if I have no risen via yoga kriya, there is no way I can experience my miserableness in Finance. Since I have descended, now I need to ascend again by moving out of Finance. This is a journey without destination.
Sri Aurobindo
Psychoanalysts - appear to progress from below upward, from past to future or from night to conscious light,but that is our narrow momentary vision that cuts out the totality of the picture, otherwise we would see that it is the future that pulls us, not the past that pushes us, and the light from above that slowly enters our night - how could night ever create the light.
The significance of lotus is not to be found by analysing the secrets of the mud from which it grows here; its secret is to be found in the heavenly archetype of the lotus that blooms for ever in the Light above.
Soul - I was searching via psychoanalyst method n I reached a void, knowing my mind is shitty n there is no solution. Then isha yoga kriya came in with the light n for a short few mths, instead of focusing on my perceived guilt n resultant suffering. Its my future, its my Destiny that is the guiding light, not me having to suffer, having to make amends, like what pearly n I think.
Sri Aurobindo
We feel we are making great effort to grow, to understand and know, we feel a tension towards the future, that is our small perspective. There may be another perspective, from which we would see this superconscious Future, striving to enter our present. And we might see that our great efforts were only the resistance put up by our denseness and darkness. The future does not move only from below upward, otherwise there would be no hope for the earth. The future move also from above downward, it descends more and more into our mental fog, our vital confusion, into the subconscious, until it illuminates everything, reveals everything, heals everything and finally fulfill everything - Destiny.
And the more it descends, the greater the resistance.
At the supreme point, where this Future touches the lowest depth of the past, where this Light burst through the bottom of the night, we will find, God willing, the Secret of Death and of immortal Life. But if we look down below and nowhere else, we will find mud and nothing but mud.
Soul - when I finally see that it was my Destiny. Only thing is still not sure what is my Destiny.
None can reach heaven who has not passed through hell.
For descent is commensurate with ascent; we cannot descend lower than we have ascended, because the force needed to descend is the very force needed to ascend. This is a fundamental psychological law no one can escape
We cannot heal unless we heal all the way down and we cannot go all the way down unless we go all the way up. The deeper we want to descend, the more powerful the light we need, otherwise we are eaten alive.
Soul - true, if I have no risen via yoga kriya, there is no way I can experience my miserableness in Finance. Since I have descended, now I need to ascend again by moving out of Finance. This is a journey without destination.
Sri Aurobindo
Psychoanalysts - appear to progress from below upward, from past to future or from night to conscious light,but that is our narrow momentary vision that cuts out the totality of the picture, otherwise we would see that it is the future that pulls us, not the past that pushes us, and the light from above that slowly enters our night - how could night ever create the light.
The significance of lotus is not to be found by analysing the secrets of the mud from which it grows here; its secret is to be found in the heavenly archetype of the lotus that blooms for ever in the Light above.
Soul - I was searching via psychoanalyst method n I reached a void, knowing my mind is shitty n there is no solution. Then isha yoga kriya came in with the light n for a short few mths, instead of focusing on my perceived guilt n resultant suffering. Its my future, its my Destiny that is the guiding light, not me having to suffer, having to make amends, like what pearly n I think.
Sri Aurobindo
We feel we are making great effort to grow, to understand and know, we feel a tension towards the future, that is our small perspective. There may be another perspective, from which we would see this superconscious Future, striving to enter our present. And we might see that our great efforts were only the resistance put up by our denseness and darkness. The future does not move only from below upward, otherwise there would be no hope for the earth. The future move also from above downward, it descends more and more into our mental fog, our vital confusion, into the subconscious, until it illuminates everything, reveals everything, heals everything and finally fulfill everything - Destiny.
And the more it descends, the greater the resistance.
At the supreme point, where this Future touches the lowest depth of the past, where this Light burst through the bottom of the night, we will find, God willing, the Secret of Death and of immortal Life. But if we look down below and nowhere else, we will find mud and nothing but mud.
Soul - when I finally see that it was my Destiny. Only thing is still not sure what is my Destiny.
Pscyhic being called the soul
Sri Aurobindo
Psychic being is what is called as the soul. And beyond the psychic being is our cosmic center or central being. The first step is to search for our individual center, the psychic being.
It is at once the simplest thing in the world and the most difficult.
The simplest, because a child understand it, or live it spontaneously in his psychic being - he is a king and he laughs! It is the most difficult, because this spontaneity is soon covered by all sorts of ideals and sentiments. That is when we start speaking of "soul", which means we no longer understand anything about of psychic being.
All the seeker's difficulties are the reverse story of a slow disentanglement from the various mental and vital mixture.
Yet, as we shall see it, it is not really travelling back to where we started, first because one can never go back, and then because the psychic child we find again at the end of the journey (an end that is always a beginning) is no longer momentary caprice but a conscious royalty.
For the psychic is a being, it grows - it is the miracle of eternal childhood is an ever vaster kingdom.
Soul - this is so right. I find myself resonate with this truth. This is my hope when I faced difficulty, knowing that there is a reason for it, knowing that I have opened and stepped into one of my unconscious doors. While I have encountered sadness, I find that my laughter has more depth. I felt m loved whenever I meditate, humming song of "Love me tender, love me sweet, love me evermore"
Since last Tuesday's finding on Sri Aurobindo, I didn't cry during my meditation.
I also note the cries n tears is during the start of meditation and hence it it just my Swan expressing her fear. When I went into meditation mode, it is only laughter. I laughed like a child, just feeling happy.
I was lost for these past 2 months, and I am back now. I have regained my faith in my inner journey.
Sri Aurobindo
The psychic birth
The first manifestations of the psychic are joy and love. A joy without any object. It needs nothing to be; for it is not a feeling but a state, like a river that is joyous wherever it flows.
Other signs reveal its presence- Lightness, nothing is a burden to it, as though the world were its play; it is invulnerable, untouched by anything, as though forever beyond tragedies; already saved from accidents; it is wise; it sees; it is tranquil.
It is free - nothing can catch it, neither life, nor men, nor ideas, nor doctrines, nor countries - it is beyond and yet innumerably in the heart for everything. For It is God in us.
How do we open the doors of the psychic being? For it is well hidden. It is hidden by our ideas and feelings which plunder it and ape it mercilessly; we have so many ideas of what is high or low, pur or impure, we have so many sentimental little padlocks on what is lovable or not. With all this clutter taking up the whole space, the poor psychic has little chance to show itself.
And if it tries to slip in, it will be used by the mind or emotion for their own purpose.
Or it could be, when it came out of its hiding place, it casts such a glory on everything it touches that we naturally confuse its luminous truth with the circumstances of the revelation. Eg, someone who had one day the revelation of his psychic while listening to Beethoven will say, "music, nothing but music is true". The same goes for churches, gurus, ocean, and etc.
Each one construct his own edifice around the nugget of experience.
But the psychic is free, marvelously free of everything!
It needs nothing to be, it is the very essence of Freedom, and uses all our greater and lesser pieces of music, our sublime or less sublime scriptures, simply to bore a hole through this armour of man, so it can come out.
It lends its power and its love, its joy, its light, its irresistible open Truth to all our ideas, feelings, doctrines, because is the only chance it is given to be born, the only means of expression it has.
Soul - that's how I think too, we can be free to explore. All matters are just channels. When we are open, anything can be a channel.
Just like Isha meditation, they were very specific on what is to be done. At first I followed, later something else in me took over n I didn't stop it, now my meditation deviate from isha, but the experience has more depth.
We need not follow any particular one or anything.
Sri Aurobindo
By the same token, the mind and vitals, drawing from this element of pure Truth, their indisputable certainties, their exclusive profoundness, the very strength of the element of truth increases the strength of the element of error. In the end, the psychic is so throughly buried, so perfectly mixed that we can no longer tell the difference and extricate the counterfeit without destroying the very fabric of truth.
Perhaps the real difficulties lies not in delivering ourselves from evil, for we know what it looks like, but in delivering ourselves from a good which is but the reverse side of evil and has put a particle of truth under lock and key for ever.
As soon as we are clear, Truth emerges spontaneously and vision, joy - it is all there without least effort.
In tragic circumstances too, the psychic can emerge, when all at once, the whole being gathers together in great poignant intensity and something is rent; then we feel a kind of presence behind which makes us do things we would normally been incapable of doing.
We will find again certain deadlocked situations that will strike us with an air of deja vu and seem wrapped in a halo of fatality : what we did not conquer in the past returns again and again, each time with a slightly different face, but basically always the same, until we confront it and untie the old knot. Such is the law of inner progress.
Soul - I would certainly know that. My old knot that has followed me for a few years now - feeling being made to suffer if asked to anything which I don't like - basically anything I perceive as low value.
Sri Aurobindo
To grow, we need to forget. We r still too young to undertand that our soul needed to learn the opposite of virtue, or rather it has allowed the asbcess its virtue was hiding to burst.
Evolution does not consist in becoming more saintly or intelligent, but in becoming more conscious.
Consciousness is the means, consciousness is the key, consciousness is the end.
Soul - I first started this inner journey because of my fear of not having control in my life. When I know thru Carl Jung that it is our unconsciousness that is the real director of our life.
It has not been easy. Each time I prod myself to proceed until alas I reach the end of my mind and found there is no peace there. Thank God for sending Isha, perhaps that is why the Energy click wit me straight, no effort on my part. In my journey, I have opened so many uncountable knots n left with nothing. I was feeling hopeful when I found Isha but a mth ago, I was down again n now He directed me to Sri Aurobindo......the journey is now smoother.
Psychic being is what is called as the soul. And beyond the psychic being is our cosmic center or central being. The first step is to search for our individual center, the psychic being.
It is at once the simplest thing in the world and the most difficult.
The simplest, because a child understand it, or live it spontaneously in his psychic being - he is a king and he laughs! It is the most difficult, because this spontaneity is soon covered by all sorts of ideals and sentiments. That is when we start speaking of "soul", which means we no longer understand anything about of psychic being.
All the seeker's difficulties are the reverse story of a slow disentanglement from the various mental and vital mixture.
Yet, as we shall see it, it is not really travelling back to where we started, first because one can never go back, and then because the psychic child we find again at the end of the journey (an end that is always a beginning) is no longer momentary caprice but a conscious royalty.
For the psychic is a being, it grows - it is the miracle of eternal childhood is an ever vaster kingdom.
Soul - this is so right. I find myself resonate with this truth. This is my hope when I faced difficulty, knowing that there is a reason for it, knowing that I have opened and stepped into one of my unconscious doors. While I have encountered sadness, I find that my laughter has more depth. I felt m loved whenever I meditate, humming song of "Love me tender, love me sweet, love me evermore"
Since last Tuesday's finding on Sri Aurobindo, I didn't cry during my meditation.
I also note the cries n tears is during the start of meditation and hence it it just my Swan expressing her fear. When I went into meditation mode, it is only laughter. I laughed like a child, just feeling happy.
I was lost for these past 2 months, and I am back now. I have regained my faith in my inner journey.
Sri Aurobindo
The psychic birth
The first manifestations of the psychic are joy and love. A joy without any object. It needs nothing to be; for it is not a feeling but a state, like a river that is joyous wherever it flows.
Other signs reveal its presence- Lightness, nothing is a burden to it, as though the world were its play; it is invulnerable, untouched by anything, as though forever beyond tragedies; already saved from accidents; it is wise; it sees; it is tranquil.
It is free - nothing can catch it, neither life, nor men, nor ideas, nor doctrines, nor countries - it is beyond and yet innumerably in the heart for everything. For It is God in us.
How do we open the doors of the psychic being? For it is well hidden. It is hidden by our ideas and feelings which plunder it and ape it mercilessly; we have so many ideas of what is high or low, pur or impure, we have so many sentimental little padlocks on what is lovable or not. With all this clutter taking up the whole space, the poor psychic has little chance to show itself.
And if it tries to slip in, it will be used by the mind or emotion for their own purpose.
Or it could be, when it came out of its hiding place, it casts such a glory on everything it touches that we naturally confuse its luminous truth with the circumstances of the revelation. Eg, someone who had one day the revelation of his psychic while listening to Beethoven will say, "music, nothing but music is true". The same goes for churches, gurus, ocean, and etc.
Each one construct his own edifice around the nugget of experience.
But the psychic is free, marvelously free of everything!
It needs nothing to be, it is the very essence of Freedom, and uses all our greater and lesser pieces of music, our sublime or less sublime scriptures, simply to bore a hole through this armour of man, so it can come out.
It lends its power and its love, its joy, its light, its irresistible open Truth to all our ideas, feelings, doctrines, because is the only chance it is given to be born, the only means of expression it has.
Soul - that's how I think too, we can be free to explore. All matters are just channels. When we are open, anything can be a channel.
Just like Isha meditation, they were very specific on what is to be done. At first I followed, later something else in me took over n I didn't stop it, now my meditation deviate from isha, but the experience has more depth.
We need not follow any particular one or anything.
Sri Aurobindo
By the same token, the mind and vitals, drawing from this element of pure Truth, their indisputable certainties, their exclusive profoundness, the very strength of the element of truth increases the strength of the element of error. In the end, the psychic is so throughly buried, so perfectly mixed that we can no longer tell the difference and extricate the counterfeit without destroying the very fabric of truth.
Perhaps the real difficulties lies not in delivering ourselves from evil, for we know what it looks like, but in delivering ourselves from a good which is but the reverse side of evil and has put a particle of truth under lock and key for ever.
As soon as we are clear, Truth emerges spontaneously and vision, joy - it is all there without least effort.
In tragic circumstances too, the psychic can emerge, when all at once, the whole being gathers together in great poignant intensity and something is rent; then we feel a kind of presence behind which makes us do things we would normally been incapable of doing.
We will find again certain deadlocked situations that will strike us with an air of deja vu and seem wrapped in a halo of fatality : what we did not conquer in the past returns again and again, each time with a slightly different face, but basically always the same, until we confront it and untie the old knot. Such is the law of inner progress.
Soul - I would certainly know that. My old knot that has followed me for a few years now - feeling being made to suffer if asked to anything which I don't like - basically anything I perceive as low value.
Sri Aurobindo
To grow, we need to forget. We r still too young to undertand that our soul needed to learn the opposite of virtue, or rather it has allowed the asbcess its virtue was hiding to burst.
Evolution does not consist in becoming more saintly or intelligent, but in becoming more conscious.
Consciousness is the means, consciousness is the key, consciousness is the end.
Soul - I first started this inner journey because of my fear of not having control in my life. When I know thru Carl Jung that it is our unconsciousness that is the real director of our life.
It has not been easy. Each time I prod myself to proceed until alas I reach the end of my mind and found there is no peace there. Thank God for sending Isha, perhaps that is why the Energy click wit me straight, no effort on my part. In my journey, I have opened so many uncountable knots n left with nothing. I was feeling hopeful when I found Isha but a mth ago, I was down again n now He directed me to Sri Aurobindo......the journey is now smoother.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Osho reading still works
Yesterday on 2 Mar, I did my weekly Osho card for guidance
My query was how can I find my way out from my sorrow n I don't want to work anymore but I also don’t know what I want to do. I felt like giving up. The only thing stopping me is that m not sure if it is my Destiny to quit or is it the Swan's fear;
I draw the Osho card but somehow I find myself unable to relate to it n tot that this week card is out as it denotes hope n liberation, something that I find not too hopeful :( So, I just put it aside
Then on 3 Mar, while waiting for doctor appt, I read Sri Aurobindo and there is a topic of dark night, of suffering and how to view it. I have just done my meditation n now writing my tots.
Below was my card
1. The issue - Intensity; It is a dark night, but with intense inquiry, you are bound to come to the sunrise. Everybody who has burned with intense inquiry has found the sunrise.
Soul - when I got this card, the only thing I acknowledge was the darkness that I am in and I know I am still inquiring n don't believe that sorrow is my ending. I wasn't hopeful on finding the Sunrise.
2. Internal influence that u r unable to see - Mind
With this cloud in ur head, u cannot know reality; you cannot attain spiritual perception. The cloud has to be dropped. And it is just with your decision to drop it that it will disappear
Soul - the current situation is like a thunderstorm, I wanted to get out of d storm n my mind is looking for way out, that the rational way. But looks like, being rational, may not be the answer.
3. External Influence that u r aware - Thunderbolt
Soul - this is my current situation n I have received this card last week - to stay calm n watch the destruction with detachment, almost as if it were happening to somebody else. Actually, the current office environment is volatile n for the first time, I haven't been using my strategy to run away. I stayed n that in itself is scary as not strategising is not my personality mode.
4. What is needed for resolution - Totality. Whatsoever u r doing, be absorbed in it so utterly that the mind thinks nothing, is just there.
We may feel that there is too much to do at once, and get bogged down. Or we may think our task is boring, because we have forgotten that its NOT what u do but HOW you do it that matters.
Taking one step through life at a time, giving ur complete attention and energy, can bring a wondrous new vitality and creativity to all that you do.
Soul - yea, was feeling numb. Now I do the Action plan with full involvement n planning to stay till the end instead of looking for my exit or hoping JC will help us all by her own voluntary exit. For once I see the ending. I didn't see the ending for Alice in Wywy, the ending for Cynthia in SunGard and the ending of JC in BBDO.
Father, TQ. I know knew how to step out of my ennui n suffering.
5. The Resolution - Understanding
You are out of jail, out of the cage; you can open your wings and the whole sky was yours.
The dawn of understanding - that the cage has always been open, and the sky has always been there for us to explore - can make us feel shaky at first. It is fine and natural to be shaky, but don't let it overshadow the opportunity to experience the lightheartedness and adventure on offer too.
Soul - when I read this yday, I tot this is a wrong card. I cannot see any hope for me. Yday was crying during meditation and said no one will save us n its up to us only. Now I am bit hopeful. I will continue to read Sri Aurobindo. I suddenly tot of the Life pages has been written. Otherwise how could my good friend become interested in yogi a couple of years back and bought this book. Hence the book, after so many years is meant for me, waiting patiently for me to read it
Few years ago, I would never have tot I connect with Sadhguru or the yogis and now I am. Amen.
My query was how can I find my way out from my sorrow n I don't want to work anymore but I also don’t know what I want to do. I felt like giving up. The only thing stopping me is that m not sure if it is my Destiny to quit or is it the Swan's fear;
I draw the Osho card but somehow I find myself unable to relate to it n tot that this week card is out as it denotes hope n liberation, something that I find not too hopeful :( So, I just put it aside
Then on 3 Mar, while waiting for doctor appt, I read Sri Aurobindo and there is a topic of dark night, of suffering and how to view it. I have just done my meditation n now writing my tots.
Below was my card
1. The issue - Intensity; It is a dark night, but with intense inquiry, you are bound to come to the sunrise. Everybody who has burned with intense inquiry has found the sunrise.
Soul - when I got this card, the only thing I acknowledge was the darkness that I am in and I know I am still inquiring n don't believe that sorrow is my ending. I wasn't hopeful on finding the Sunrise.
2. Internal influence that u r unable to see - Mind
With this cloud in ur head, u cannot know reality; you cannot attain spiritual perception. The cloud has to be dropped. And it is just with your decision to drop it that it will disappear
Soul - the current situation is like a thunderstorm, I wanted to get out of d storm n my mind is looking for way out, that the rational way. But looks like, being rational, may not be the answer.
3. External Influence that u r aware - Thunderbolt
Soul - this is my current situation n I have received this card last week - to stay calm n watch the destruction with detachment, almost as if it were happening to somebody else. Actually, the current office environment is volatile n for the first time, I haven't been using my strategy to run away. I stayed n that in itself is scary as not strategising is not my personality mode.
4. What is needed for resolution - Totality. Whatsoever u r doing, be absorbed in it so utterly that the mind thinks nothing, is just there.
We may feel that there is too much to do at once, and get bogged down. Or we may think our task is boring, because we have forgotten that its NOT what u do but HOW you do it that matters.
Taking one step through life at a time, giving ur complete attention and energy, can bring a wondrous new vitality and creativity to all that you do.
Soul - yea, was feeling numb. Now I do the Action plan with full involvement n planning to stay till the end instead of looking for my exit or hoping JC will help us all by her own voluntary exit. For once I see the ending. I didn't see the ending for Alice in Wywy, the ending for Cynthia in SunGard and the ending of JC in BBDO.
Father, TQ. I know knew how to step out of my ennui n suffering.
5. The Resolution - Understanding
You are out of jail, out of the cage; you can open your wings and the whole sky was yours.
The dawn of understanding - that the cage has always been open, and the sky has always been there for us to explore - can make us feel shaky at first. It is fine and natural to be shaky, but don't let it overshadow the opportunity to experience the lightheartedness and adventure on offer too.
Soul - when I read this yday, I tot this is a wrong card. I cannot see any hope for me. Yday was crying during meditation and said no one will save us n its up to us only. Now I am bit hopeful. I will continue to read Sri Aurobindo. I suddenly tot of the Life pages has been written. Otherwise how could my good friend become interested in yogi a couple of years back and bought this book. Hence the book, after so many years is meant for me, waiting patiently for me to read it
Few years ago, I would never have tot I connect with Sadhguru or the yogis and now I am. Amen.
A new perception on suffering
Sri Aurobindo
If instead of responding to the incoming vibration, we maintain absolute inner stillness, we see that this stillness dissolves the vibration.
All vibrations, whatever their nature is contagious.
The key to mastery is always silence, at every level, becos in silence we can discern the vibrations, and to discern them means to be able to catch hold of them.
Alone, we can very easily live under the perfect delusion of self mastery n hence we need to mingle with life.
The real complications are not in life but in ourselves, and all external circumstances are the exact image of what we are.
All these vibrations of disorder that we call "sorrow", our troubles, have the immediate result of weakening or disintegrating our protective snowfield and open the door wide to the adverse forces.
We can discover we can go down as low as we can rise high, that in reality our downs are in exact proportion to our capacity of height.
That by which you fall is that by which you rise, says Kularnava Tantra. We blame the "Enemy", but is it not possible that the soul itself - not the outward mind, but the spirit within - has accepted and chosen these things as part of its development in order to get through the necessary experience at a rapid rate, to hew throguh, durchhauen, even at the risk or the cost of much damage to the outward life and the body? To the growing soul, to the spirit within us, may not difficulties, obstacles, attacks be a mean of growth, added strength, enlarged experience, trainning for spiritual victory.
We cry out against evil, but if it were not there to beset us and defy us, we would have long ago seized the eternal Truth and turned it into an impregnable tidy little platitude.
The method for dealing with these adverse forces is the same as with the other vibrations : silence, inner stillness which let's the storm blow over.
In practice, the seeker of the integral yoga will be much more exposed than others, because he seeks to embrace everything in his consciousness, without cutting off anything and because there is not just one passage to force open, toward the bliss above, not just one guardian of the treasure to overcome, but many passages, to the right, left n below and every level of our being and more than one treasure to uncover
Soul - my tot is I was being harsh with myself n I want to quit. Then this phrase of silence, n 2nd tot came in, if u wan to quit, quit after the storm.
Its true, u don't like the work, but now what's pushing u away is the fear of storm. So stay silent.
Evenin
Sri Aurobindo
For every one of our feelings is the reverse of another, at any moment can change into its 'opposite' - the disillusioned philanthropist (or rather the disillusioned vital in the philanthropist) becomes a pessimist. Here we touch upon another flaw of the surface vital; it is an incorrigible charlattan, every role suits it - we are not even sure that our own mother's death escapes its pleasure.
And to crown its talents, the vital excels in fogging everything up - it is fog incarnate - and mistakes the force of its feeling for the force of truth: its substitutes for the heights a smoky volcano summit in the abyss.
The utter powerlessness of the vital to help others, or even simply to communicate, except when there is a meeting of egoisms.
In truth, our sorrows and sufferings are always the sign of a mixture, and therefore always deceitful.
Joy alone is true. Because only the I in us that embraces all existence and all possible opposites of existence is true.
We suffer because we put things outside ourselves. When all is inside, all is joy, because there is no more gap anywhere.
The Heart is actually the most mixed place of all. It also soon goes out of breathe.
Soul - yesterday I cried again, saying that no one is coming to save me. This time, I didn't hold on to it, just let it cry. Because somehow, I tot of The Alchemist, the Swan (Heart) also has its fear, jus like Eagle has his. So, I acknowledged its suffering but I won't do anything yet cause I now reach a point that m not sure of my Swan, just like m not sure of my Eagle.
Sri Aurobindo
The Life-Force (Energy) does not suffer, it is not troubled, impassioned, bad or good - it is, it flows, immense and peaceful.
All the contrary signs our vital assumes in us are only vestiges of our past evolution, when we are small, very small and separate and had no choice but to proetect ourselves from the living immensity too intense for our smallness, to distinguish between "useful" and "harmful" vibrations, the former getting a positive coefficient of pleasure or symphaty or good, the latter a negative coeffficient of suffering or repulsion or evil.
Hence the remedy is not to starve our vital but to broaden it, to accept n to enlarge our consciousness. For such is the very meaning of evolution.
Ultimately, the only thing we must renounce is our ignorance and our smallness.
When we frantically cling to our small frontal personality, to its playacting, and sticky sentimentality and saintly sorrow, we are not being truly "human", we are laggards of the Pleistocene, we defend our right to sorrow and suffering.
Soul - Father, Thank you for guiding my good friend to buy this book for me. It led me to see my suffering in another mode. When I first started, I couldn't feel sadness even. Then it sadness and alas adjourned to suffering n now stopping and perhaps taking a U turn back.
If instead of responding to the incoming vibration, we maintain absolute inner stillness, we see that this stillness dissolves the vibration.
All vibrations, whatever their nature is contagious.
The key to mastery is always silence, at every level, becos in silence we can discern the vibrations, and to discern them means to be able to catch hold of them.
Alone, we can very easily live under the perfect delusion of self mastery n hence we need to mingle with life.
The real complications are not in life but in ourselves, and all external circumstances are the exact image of what we are.
All these vibrations of disorder that we call "sorrow", our troubles, have the immediate result of weakening or disintegrating our protective snowfield and open the door wide to the adverse forces.
We can discover we can go down as low as we can rise high, that in reality our downs are in exact proportion to our capacity of height.
That by which you fall is that by which you rise, says Kularnava Tantra. We blame the "Enemy", but is it not possible that the soul itself - not the outward mind, but the spirit within - has accepted and chosen these things as part of its development in order to get through the necessary experience at a rapid rate, to hew throguh, durchhauen, even at the risk or the cost of much damage to the outward life and the body? To the growing soul, to the spirit within us, may not difficulties, obstacles, attacks be a mean of growth, added strength, enlarged experience, trainning for spiritual victory.
We cry out against evil, but if it were not there to beset us and defy us, we would have long ago seized the eternal Truth and turned it into an impregnable tidy little platitude.
The method for dealing with these adverse forces is the same as with the other vibrations : silence, inner stillness which let's the storm blow over.
In practice, the seeker of the integral yoga will be much more exposed than others, because he seeks to embrace everything in his consciousness, without cutting off anything and because there is not just one passage to force open, toward the bliss above, not just one guardian of the treasure to overcome, but many passages, to the right, left n below and every level of our being and more than one treasure to uncover
Soul - my tot is I was being harsh with myself n I want to quit. Then this phrase of silence, n 2nd tot came in, if u wan to quit, quit after the storm.
Its true, u don't like the work, but now what's pushing u away is the fear of storm. So stay silent.
Evenin
Sri Aurobindo
For every one of our feelings is the reverse of another, at any moment can change into its 'opposite' - the disillusioned philanthropist (or rather the disillusioned vital in the philanthropist) becomes a pessimist. Here we touch upon another flaw of the surface vital; it is an incorrigible charlattan, every role suits it - we are not even sure that our own mother's death escapes its pleasure.
And to crown its talents, the vital excels in fogging everything up - it is fog incarnate - and mistakes the force of its feeling for the force of truth: its substitutes for the heights a smoky volcano summit in the abyss.
The utter powerlessness of the vital to help others, or even simply to communicate, except when there is a meeting of egoisms.
In truth, our sorrows and sufferings are always the sign of a mixture, and therefore always deceitful.
Joy alone is true. Because only the I in us that embraces all existence and all possible opposites of existence is true.
We suffer because we put things outside ourselves. When all is inside, all is joy, because there is no more gap anywhere.
The Heart is actually the most mixed place of all. It also soon goes out of breathe.
Soul - yesterday I cried again, saying that no one is coming to save me. This time, I didn't hold on to it, just let it cry. Because somehow, I tot of The Alchemist, the Swan (Heart) also has its fear, jus like Eagle has his. So, I acknowledged its suffering but I won't do anything yet cause I now reach a point that m not sure of my Swan, just like m not sure of my Eagle.
Sri Aurobindo
The Life-Force (Energy) does not suffer, it is not troubled, impassioned, bad or good - it is, it flows, immense and peaceful.
All the contrary signs our vital assumes in us are only vestiges of our past evolution, when we are small, very small and separate and had no choice but to proetect ourselves from the living immensity too intense for our smallness, to distinguish between "useful" and "harmful" vibrations, the former getting a positive coefficient of pleasure or symphaty or good, the latter a negative coeffficient of suffering or repulsion or evil.
Hence the remedy is not to starve our vital but to broaden it, to accept n to enlarge our consciousness. For such is the very meaning of evolution.
Ultimately, the only thing we must renounce is our ignorance and our smallness.
When we frantically cling to our small frontal personality, to its playacting, and sticky sentimentality and saintly sorrow, we are not being truly "human", we are laggards of the Pleistocene, we defend our right to sorrow and suffering.
Soul - Father, Thank you for guiding my good friend to buy this book for me. It led me to see my suffering in another mode. When I first started, I couldn't feel sadness even. Then it sadness and alas adjourned to suffering n now stopping and perhaps taking a U turn back.
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