Love/Hate relationship (2)

Feb 11
Mmm, today was bit off. Lost focus a few times. Thinkin of future.
But I preservere. Tomorro leavin for India.

The Power of Now
Every crisis represents not only danger but also opportunity.
If relationship energises and magnify egoic mind patterns and activate the pain-body, as they do at this time, why not accept this fact rather than try to escape from it.
Why not cooperate with it instead of avoiding relationship or continuing to pursue the phantom of an ideal partner as an answer to ur problems or as a means of feeling fufilled?

Soul
That's what I tot in d brief rship whereby I was conned. My body was saying no but my mind say yes.
Of cos, when I ended it, I know it happen cos I was havin a low self esteem. But the fact I ended it shows that I valued myself and I tot it has been uphill since then.
But, I am afraid. I don't trust myself. I am not sure if I could handle the pain-body that arise, the feeling of vulnerability, which represent weakness to me. Of cos it happen a few years ago and now I am different, less on mind. But am I ready?

The Power of Now
The opportunity that is concealed within every crisis does not manifest until all the facts of any given situation are acknowledged and fully accpeted.
As long as u deny them, as long as u try to escape from them or wish that things were different, the window of opportunity does not open up and u remain trapped inside that situation, which will remain the same or deteriorate further.
With the acknowledgement and acceptance of the facts also comes a degree of freedom from them.
For eg., when u know there is a disharmony and u hold that "knowing", through ur knowing, a new factor has come in, and the disharmony cannot remain unchanged.
When u know u r not at peace, ur knowing create a still space that surrounds ur nonpeace in a loving and tender embrace and then transmute ur nonpeace into peace
As far as inner transformation is concerned there is NOTHING you can do about it.
You cannot transform yourself and you certainly cannot transform your partner or anybody else.
All u can do is to create a space for transformation to happen, for grace and love to enter.

Soul
Wow. This lift the responsibility from me. Ego is saying why I can't transform myself. Does d meditation help.
Now I realised that I preservere cos meditation is d doorway for grace to come in. I can only relax and be open. As to how, what or when or if it happen doesn't belong to me.
I need only to be open and not close up.
The rship thingy has been bothering me. And it is so timely that m reading it jus before I went to India

The Power of Now
So whenever ur relationship is not working, whenever it brings out the "madness" in u and ur partner, be glad.
What was unconscious is being brought to the light.
It is an opportunity for salvation.
If u observe unconscious behaviour in ur partner, hold it in loving embrace of ur knowing so that u won't react.
Unconsciousness and knowing cannot coexist for long - even if the knowing is only in the other person and not in the one who is acting out the unconsciousness.
If u react at all to ur partner's unconsciousness, u become unconscious yourself.
But if u then remember to know ur reaction, nothing is lost.

Soul
Yea, I practiced that. and now teaching my staff in handling CEO.

The Power of Now
As u may have noticed, relationship are not here to make u happy or fulfilled. If u continue to pursue the goal of salvation through a relationship, u will be disillusioned again and again.
But if u accept that the relationship is here to make u conscious instead of happy, then the relationship will offer u salvation, and u will be aligning urself with the higher consciousness that wants to be born into the world.
Judgement is either to confuse someone unconscious behaviour with who they are or to project ur own unconsciousness onto another person and mistake that for who they are.
When the pain-body has been transmuted and u r no longer identified with mind and mental positions, and if ur partner has done the same, u will experience the bliss of the flowering of relationship.
Instead of mirroing to each other ur pain and unconsciousness, instead of satisfying ur mutual addictive needs, u will reflect back to each other the love that u feel deep within, the love that comes with the realisation or ur oness wit all that is.
This is the love that has no opposite.
If u can feel ur emotions, u r not far from the radiant inner body just underneath.

If u r mainly in ur head, the distance is much greater and u need to bring consciousness into the emotional body before u can reach the inner body
Mind
Emotion
Energy.

If there isn't an emanation of love and joy, complete presence and openness toward ALL beings, then it is not enlightenment.
Another indicator is how a person behaves in difficult/challenging situation or when things go wrong.

Evenin
Today hav a good session wit CD. M real glad I got to know him better. He was also upfront wit me. He said despite havin everything, he is not sure why he is still not happy.
M surprised he understand abt the projection issue and he admitted he has hidden anger.
I told him that he was real lucky to stay this naïve for so long. He didn't have to face d politic arena.
Mmm, he is d second person cos my friend BE also d same.
Me, I faced it at d start of my career. I used to think God doesn't love me, give me such difficult challenges from day 1. Now I realised perhaps He know m ready.
M glad that CEO finally realise that CD is jus plain naïve. Its not he is too arrogant to play d corporate game, it is becos he is too simple and totally ignore the basic rule. She in turn decide that she need not be defensive n to call another person.
3 hours wit him, 1 hour wit CEO. Tiring day. Father, how lah to be coach, perhaps I didn't root myself.