Osho - inner emptiness is outside fulfillment

Apr 30

Today alarm at 4.30 am but feel sleepy. Decided to sleep in cos tonight got yogaasanas practice.

Woke up at 5.30 am. Tot of office matters. Remember that I need to trust things will be okay. Regional boss already assured myself the job security for next year eventhough we lost the major client. So stay cool. As for the severance, let local boss revert.

Did Bhuta Shuddi, sat in Ardhasiddhasana. Went in deep. Gave its 5 minutes time for energy to balance. Did preparatory steps for Surya Kriya followed by one cycle. Elbow improving, less painful.
61 points awareness not okay. Haven't been able to be in awareness mode for the past one month.

Did a short breathing in my Ardhasiddhasana but can't go deep. Not able to get into the awareness mode.

Shakti was good. Focus on slow Kapala Bhakti. Now I timed it till the upper belly is filled with air. Then I exhale. While the exhalation not strong, ie not intense. But towards the end of Kapala Bhakti I was singing. After the end of Shakti, I was singing and dancing.

Shambavi was good in  Ardhasiddhasana. At first no animal sound. Later was dancing and singing.

After practices quickly wear Rudraskh. Yesterday not wearing I got flustered. Today I m balance. Able to feel my inner comfort.

Going with the flow. Have faith that all things will turn up fine.


Secrets of yoga
Gurdjieff
The first thing is to become non-identified and to remember continuously that u are a witness, just a consciousness, neither an act nor a tot.

If this rememberance becomes a crystallised phenomenon in u, u attained to Vivek, discrimination; then spontaneously follows vairagya
If u don't become discriminating, spontaneously follows samsara, the world.
If u become identified with body and mind, u move out - u go into the world, u are expelled from the garden of Eden.
If you discriminate and u remember that u are in the body and the body is an abode and u are the owner and the mind is just a biocomputer, u are the master and the mind is just a slave - then a turning in. Then u are not moving into the world, because the first step has been removed. Now u are no longer bridged with the world, suddenly u start to falling in.

Soul
Can't wait for Samyama Sadhana.
When I fall in during Sadhana; so much contentment.

Secrets of yoga
And when u go on falling in and in and in, and there comes the last point beyond which there is no go, the summum bonum, it is called kaivalya; u become alone. U don't need anybody.
U don't need the constant effort of filling urself with something or the other. Now u are in tune with ur emptiness, and because of ur tuning in with the emptiness, the very emptiness has become a fullness, an infinity, a fulfilment, a fruition of being.

Soul
Amen.
With my path of aloneness and my karmic need for soul mate and validation from close friends; I truly need it.
Now my shrine is my comfort; my source of unconditional love.