Sadhguru - a possibility

Afternoon
Father, yea, I appreciate that my jobs has loads of variety. I am appreciative that my colleagues and I have arrive in a better place.
I seem to not dislike my job as much as before. Even managed to do away with REV2 CP and Regional said they working on a budgeting software. I am in a good place.
So, after crossing all the hurdles, I am in a better place,

Today want to cut my hair, want to have a new hair style that is more vibrant, wan to do away with the fringe.

Osho reading.
Totality - it is not what u do, but how u do it that matters.
Giving each step ur complete attention and energy, can bring a wondrous new vitality and creativity to all that u do.

Soul - yeap, I would learn that.

Sadhguru
I want u to look at me not as a person, but a possibility. Why certain people get access to certain possibilities and others don't, that is the question. Now, this is not really true.
It is not that only certain people get access to this possibility. Anybody who is truly longing, always has access to this, to this energy, which you right now refers to as me.
I have initiated more people I have not met than people I have met. When someone really longs, I initiate them, wherever they may be, when the longing is deep enough to receive me. When someone's heart cries out to know, I am always there.

Being with a Master is never comfortable, because He will break all your limitations, all ur ideologies. So knowing the person or having access to the person can be on many levels. Having access to the possibility is only because of the longing that one may have. There are many people who have close access to the person, but don't know anything about the possibility yet. Knowing the person is of no great significance. You need sensitivity, to be life sensitive, not ego sensitive.

Soul. This is the same answer I tot of during meditation jus now. Like our teacher said, its not d location, but u know the participants and hence cannot open up and share. I agree with her. But I also feel that BSP is a natural progression of the Isha Movement. Perhaps, like d British guy, even if he not open during BSP, he can open during Volunteering for BSP
But jus now during meditation, there is another tot. If the person has a longing to know, he/she wil open up automatically cos d longing is more than the ego's pride. He/she can't help it. Jus like me singing Guru Pooja last sunday. I received d same instruction in previous sathsang and I was surprised at the audacity of me singing guru pooja when I can only sing 50% and I clamped it down n didn't sing. This sathsang, d msg came for me to sing guru pooja, I told Sadhguru (verbalise) that I don't want to sing lah. Next minute I knew I start to sing. This time can I can sing about 80%. My pride was overcome and I sang without fear or shame, but softly.
Later after d sathsang, a lady came up to me and asked why I didn't finish the last 2 stanza. I was surprised n asked how she knew, she said she heard me cos she was sitting near to me. I laughed and I told her I cannot remember the last 2 stanza.

So, d opening is depending on the person's longing and hence its receptivity towards involuntary opening up irrespective of who is in the surrounding.
Mmm, this will be my email reply tomorrow. I know this is also Sadhguru's msg cos today d meditation was very expressive and later I was asked to read him eventhough I am not seeking for any guidance.

Evening
Hello God's drama series
That is how Life is. You gained when u tot u lost everything.

Soul. Today I finally cut my hair short. It looks good n modern n I think I found back Ram - Kelvin equivalent at 50% his price.

I lost my validation in career, n become sad n felt hopeless n lost and unvalidated, unloved. But I have gained so much more validation/acceptance from my meditation. At first it was just during meditation, and then internal transformation and alas external transformation.

I have finally took the plunge and my hair cut off is the outcome of decision made.