Connecting with Joseph Campbell (writer/speaker) (2)

Jan 25 Eve

"We must be willing to get rid of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Joseph Campbell.

Father, I think it is meant to be. While its great to receive vote of confidence from both SL and H, so I feel support. I was still feeling uncertain on my path. The things I write about is my insight and related stories. I haven't read any such authors. And here U gave me Joseph John Campbell. He was born in 1904 and pass away in 1987, at age 83.

I felt the connection that I may become like him as he too is into writing his thoughts, insights and stories. And his mentor are the same mentors as mine, albeit I only read them, unlike John who meet them. Mentors like Krishnamurti, Jame Joyce, Carl Jung, Swami Nikhilanada for Sri Ramakrishna
He just like to read, reflect and write. Just like me. So, he embarked into a English literature course that will give him his writing. He started with a short story.

Soul
Father, that could have been my path. Actually, the main attraction for A was because of his good command of english and his writing skills. Back in 1999, I have not started to do writing yet but I was into journeling into small note books (Alas I have thrown them all away).

I have a way with words. I seem to understand complexity and able to have an understanding easily. That's why I read contracts well.
Alas, if my parents were educated and I may have taken art class instead. I tot good english means good grammar. I have always do well with stories.

Now that I know I am smart and writing my own stories, I am no longer attracted to writers (English). Perhaps that's why I was attracted to lawyers previously as I tot was not smart enough.

Why am I attracted to Z? It all started with the comfort living(shower), banana, then food, no smell, physically comfortable with him on close up. At first, I write him off as not up to par with me mentally, but there were some glimmer that makes me think I could be wrong and there could be more to him. And as I talked more I found that he is smart. He is also open with me, trust me and gave me his date of birth and time. I found out about his Salesman/Ladies Man card Ruling card and The Faith Destiny card. And I found out that we r so right for each other. And I then can see us together mentally and then the attraction start.

Then he start to say he wanted marriage and children. I was bit off and I don't see that in me and I tot the cards must be wrong.
A few days later I wonder why did he go back to same family man path when he now have a chance to evaluate and create a new life for himself. That's when I tot perhaps he didn't do his Passion List and hence don't know what he truly wants.

Father, Z told me his dream is go public listed and create a company that provides comfortable living for his employees.
Z also revealed how much he values a good relationship. And he is sensitive enough to ensure that the wife will not get hurt through his inconsiderations.

Father, Z is a true diamond. I told him that I see him as an uncut diamond. It such a pity that he didn't show up. What u see is not what u get. And he is a real prize.

He confirmed with me that, for me, what he see is what he get. I showed up. He asked me about my other plan, apart from being a famous writer and transformation leader. I told him that I can't answer as he is still in my 3rd door. He wasn't too happy and said he will call me tomorrow to go to 4th door. Earlier when I told him about 5 doors, he asked which level was he. I told him yesterday was 2nd and now he is in 3rd. He says he will breakthru all 5 doors.

He ended the call by saying he wants us to meet up for a nice coffee and I agreed. We will meet next week.

Father, I want him. He values relationship, he wants to have coffee and he wants to have a successful business. That's the vision list of my husband. I also used to dream of a husband who is a retired playboy, who has done his round and wants to settle down.

(Feb 6 - he fits the bill. Infact, he always asked if I am ready to settle down. He has asked me 3 times already. He says that he thinks I am not keen to settle down. I told him that I didn't plan or tot of it, besides there is much uncertainty in relationship. Perhaps its my fear of failure that make me avoid it.)