Tamil IE (2)

Sept 6

Father, the initiation plus d clearing has propel me to another level.

Today was laughing so much during suria. Suria was effortless and the right elbow pain is gone. Did my shambavi, there was bit pain on right leg probably due to fall last Friday coupled with heavy flapping of my legs to the music during IE. The amazing thing is I was humming and then followed by vigorous dancing and ended with plough back asana.
So, with that I will go to IE to do my shambavi, to cement it. I cannot understand the language but I am receptive towards Sadhguru presence. I just want it to envelop me.

(Oct 8 - i know do flapping of my 2 legs during the fast breathing mode. Laughter is nearly gone. All my meditation has deepen considerably and extended about half an hour for both morning and evening practices respectively)

Has tot of d teacher, such a lovely being. People likes and welcome lovely being. I wonder when can I be that. Then a sobering tot came, I can't. But wait, I am joyful being. So what if people doesn't welcome me. Main thing is I am my Natural self and I like me.

Also, during the relax mode after hatha yoga, suddenly did the open mouth and chest breathing, felt lighter. So, can do the open mouth breathing on daily basis.

Then the breathing meditation. Not sure if I was conscious abt my being, but I felt light and I consciously keep my palm open at both laps instead of letting it close like norm.

Father, thank U. Everything I need will be given to me. Yday I have new updates to my Vision Book. Amen.

The past is gone and I have me Now. I am ready to embark on my Natural Self. I want to re-read the Law of Attraction, 3rd time. The first time I couldn't relate, the second time I have realisation and the third time is manifestation. I want to attract and manifest my Vision Book.

Heal Ur Life
Fighting the negative is a waste of time if u really want to make changes in ur life. The more u dwell on what u don't want, the more of if u create. The things about urself or ur life that u have always dislike are probably still with u.
What u put ur attention on grows and become permanent in ur life. Move away from the negative and put ur attention on what it is that u really do want to be or have.

(Oct 8 - yea, instead of focusing on my past wound. Lets just focus on my desire for my vision partner)

Soul
Such a coincidence. That's exactly what I just read. For years, I was focusing on gaining control of my unconsciousness and have been opening doors after doors. Well, its enough. The Past is open up and gone. Now I just need to blow out of the remnants of emotions from my chest.
I want to use my Power to attract and manifest what I want instead.
I would no longer judge and criticise myself unlovingly. I have come a long way and I like who I am now. Yday just before sleeping, I was laughing so much. So carefree. I love me

I have a wonderful new relationship
I am my own person
I am filled with love and affection for myself
I am joyous, happy and free
I am totally healthy.

Heal Ur life
It is impossible to really love yourself unless u have self-approval and self-acceptance.
This means no criticism whatsoever.

Soul
Yeap. I never realised it. But I have criticised myself inwardly all these years. S was just a projection of my inner criticism. Thanks for sending S to my life. I will measure my inward criticism by my outward criticism of him.

(Oct 8 - finally decided to recruit his weakness instead and can now focus on his strength. My criticism of him has reduced considerably. Actually, little irritation left)

Heal ur life
Self-criticism is just the mind going on with old chatter. See how u have trained ur mind to berate u and be resistant to change?
Ignore those tots and get on with the important work on hand!

(Oct 8 - yea, now i am visualising my time with my vision partner and a tot would come and say that i m over-myself. I just ignore it)

Soul
Father, U always gave me whatever I need, right on time. When I read this book a few months ago. I didn't relate well and especially this section of not loving urself. I tot I did and as for self-criticism, I totally ignores it cos there is no way I could have criticised myself.
Now reading 2nd time and after my Realisation that my brother was my parent and he criticise me and I hated it, but inwardly I learnt to criticise myself too.