Saturday, December 18, 2010

Humility vs arrogance

Nov 24 Eve

Father, the fall from arrogance; All the years, I always have bosses who thinks m great and i grew arrogant. Finally back in 2003; I finally encountered my downfall
1. When I report to a boss who didn't know m good - Al
2. When I report to a boss who didn't know m hard working / good - M
3. When I report to a boss who didn't know my communication is good - J
4. When I have to do excel reporting work.
5. When I ate the kanji in ashram in Feb 2010
6. When I bow to Sadhguru's energy stone in ashram in Oct 2010
7. When I have to bow to painful joints due to RA.

So, I would say m falling from arrogance but long way to go on humility. My inability to be humble is the reason why I can't do service for others. My inability to be humble is why I can't give white lies.

(Dec 19 - this morning got a great idea to promote IE pgm. As usual, I expect others to do the work of organising/setup since I came out with idea. When i realised that they are slow in reverting, i tot i can't asked them to do as we are all volunteers. Since i got the idea and I am now free, why don't i just do it. I did call and arrange for set-up. This is service for Isha. Guess I am now able to service as I finally saw my Deflation mode in areas of uncertainty, with the help from R, who operates on Deflation mode.)


Now I understand the Osho transformation card
1. Issue
Uniqueness
Beyond superiority and inferiority.
Nobody is equal, but nobody is superior and nobody is inferior. Everyone has its own potential to contribute to life. Everyone has to discover their own being. The man who feel superior is still feeling inferior.

Soul
This is telling me yeap, there is inequality in terms of different level of contribution. But the different levels doesn't make anyone superior or inferior. Just like the person doing reporting is not inferior to a person doing strategy.

Foolish Heart
The heart looks foolish. Love always looks foolish, because love is not utilitarian.
Mind is utilitarian. It uses everything for something else - that is the meaning of utilitarian. Mind is purposive, end-orientated; it turns everything into a means - and love cannot be turned into a means, that is the problem. Love in itself is the goal.

Soul
This to remind me that my mind leads to arrogance while love is itself the goal. Amen

Suddenly tot that if without the RA, I would still be arrogant and do my own path and won't follow Sadhguru till samyama. RA made me humble that I can wake up 4 am to do hatha yoga and meditation. RA made me humble to do 3 hours of meditation and 1 hour of yoga daily.
RA is to ensure I stay on path.

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