Cosmic Reward - benefits from ending (14) - learning from Z

Jun 30
Father, thank U. Did my practices and today managed to accompany family to hospital.

Now reading my Year Card
Destiny's Pluto Card
Seven of Spade

Destiny Results
Eight of Spades
As a result of contending with ur Pluto, is the element of developing a strong will power and determination that can help u overcome any obstacles in ur path.

Soul
No wonder Z has so much will power. One of his attraction was that he is a self-made man and the fact he overcome so many challenges. He has loads of will power.

Father, yea, that's what I want for myself. Like he said I am a lazy bum.
I do have loads of creative ideas and also blessed with inherent knowledge. But somehow I never pursued them. The only one I really go out for was Isha. But that wasn't difficult with the exception of food. Waking up earlier and delaying food is not an issue per se.

Suddenly a tot occurred. Overcome challenges requires will power. I did use will power to start with Z. And now also need will power to end with Z. Yea, I could learn from him. Even when I was ending with him and I said it will not be easy. He told me don't say that but be positive that I can end it.

Father, he is not my man and I really wish he will get his woman and I know he will. He deserved it cos he is real diamond.

Ace of Heart
Our relationships always reflect how we love ourselves,

Soul
This morning I tot of my sisters and their spouse. All of them need their spouse mainly for physical purpose. They are all mentally and financially capable and is able to handle emotion except for 2nd sis. No wonder none of them married financially capable guy.

Me, I too am like that. I need a partner for physical purpose. So that's I end it with Z. The touch and go concept doesn't come with physical purpose. So, what's the point.
So, why stay with a man that I cannot have with me physically in both short and long term.

Previously I was searching for smart guys that is financially capable. But somehow I cannot open up to them.

Then with Z, it was mostly physical. He is financially strapped but I wasn't worried. No wonder I open up to him and enjoyed his company. Alas, he is the turning point for me. Thanks.