Dec 15
Did kapalvriksha meditation. My first wish was to be Z's wife, second mid term wish is to be a full time famous author. Then final wish is to be a philanthropist.
Looks like I finally make up my mind.
Then I tot of buying a shirt for
Z and so I text him for his size. There were no reply within 15 minutes and feeling of smallness arise. After two hours, some tots still flow in but this time I don't want to follow it and wallow in self pity like a small unwanted child.
One thing I have learned with Z is that he creates situation where my small unwanted Child arise...and I start to defend myself by attacking him and then myself. Well, Let me overcome this...
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