All difficulty in letting go is due to lack of faith in abundance

Apr 15

In my rship with local Isha, I got to be the strong one. I know I don't want to lead and hence wants to take a break. They are afraid no one lead and hence hold me back.
This is the same as both Y and Z knows that they are not my match, our values and culture are different and so they leave. I hold them back cos I tot I can't have another, not because I think they are a good match.
Same as me being Sathsang guide, they can see my resistance and resentment of being a guide, not a good one but they tot no one else and they themselves don't want to do it.

I got to be strong one here. Just as Z and Y was the strong one. Just as I now know Z and Y is not my match, the same I have been telling local Isha. They know but just fear. Well, I have been helping them with my power for too many times and too long. Time for myself. Let me learn from Z and Y.

Lunar in Scorpio
U need to develop more trust in the universe so u are not constantly running scared. Then u can relax and allow the universe to help u build what you feel is truly good and worthwhile, so u can find peace and enjoyment in life. U r learning that u cannot depend on other people to set ur boundaries and contain ur energy. U need to get in touch what is good for u and begin to act within ur own boundaries and be responsible for ur own energies.


Soul
So true. I hope local Isha would let go of me. I hope Z and Y to set the boundaries. Y set clear boundaries. Z also set but not as clear. Me with local Isha also not clear.

Cosmic lesson - Seven of Spades.
Just realised that I m surrounded by Seven of Diamonds
1. Ye - Destiny
2. Je - Destiny
3. Sa - Destiny
4. Ke - Ruling

Lunar in Scorpio
Human frailty frustrates u. U are driven to perfection and u find physical weakness in the physical body limit ur power. U seek a sense of mastery over urself and ur environment and u strive to master the physical body and learn its limits.
In the search for limits, the first place u tend to look is ur physical body.

Soul
True in a way.

Lunar in Scorpio
As u learn to trust urself u will know that u are strong enough to get back up again if you fail. U are beginning to realise that u don't need the support of all those around u because u are a mountain of power within urself. When u connect with the power  within and learn to go with ur natural inborn flow, u will find that the universe does support u and there is good in the world - and in u. That is what u are here to learn: discovery and belief in ur own goodness.

Soul
Amen. I always think others better than me. When they don't choose me I tot I m worse off. Actually we are not suitable. And maybe they are no match for me and its their insecurity that led them not to choose me. Could be.

Lunar in Scorpio
U are also learning to stop projecting ur goodness outside for someone to believe in. As u learn to support and trust urself by being true to ur own sense of goodness, u can begins to construct ur own boundaries and contain ur own energy.

Soul
Amen. That's what I told P yesterday that I need a break and to focus back on my writing after nearly one year by real.

Lunar in Scorpio
This gives u the freedom to be more trusting of those around u, since it eliminates the need to give away ur power. This also leads to the realisation that it is all right for u to be successful and to be in the limelight. Then u can become the  power of ur own throne and rise to success.
From this position u can support those around u - but from a purer motive, since u no longer feel u need then go ensure ur own strength. Now when u support others it will be from a place of true caring and u will no longer be involved in a process that gives ur power away.


Soul
That's what I said. I am a fake. I do it not because I want to.
Finally I understood. I do have a choice. I too can set my boundary
Father, finally seeing the light. Y was the catalyst.