Being myself

Jul 2
Woke up at 7.30 am upon alarm but body still bit tired as I slept around 3 plus yesterday. Spent some time with shrine before I sleep.

Angarmadhana was good. Surya kriya fine except the right elbow is bit painful as it is still swollen. Right knee is better.
Shakti was okay and now being conscious of throat constriction during 5242 and Kapala Bhakti. Not sure if I imagine but towards the end I think the sound is in right direction. Towards the end I was singing.
Shambavi was good. Learning to do correct Suka kriya. Aum chanting was amazing.

There were some tots of Y's wife and her appeal for help. Truly not sure if I should step in. Perhaps best to pass this to the Sathsang guide who is also Y's friend. I m not keen on drama. Y's behavior is expected and may be this is his wife karma. But I do sympathise with her as Y is ignoring her plea.

Tot of yesterday volunteering. Even my friends commented that they were surprised to see me doing the carpets. I told them I feel contented just doing the ribbon on the carpet. K commented that he always see me as the coordinator and not the runner. It is true. Even in volunteering I segregated being leader and runner and I only wanted to be leader as it has more valuation.
So timely. I truly don't want leader role in local Isha. Looks like I found my place being the runner.
This reminds me of when I segregated or judge reporting as low level work and hence it breaks me to do. I finally overcome it.
Alas now volunteering it has come to do that, albeit in reverse way.