Feb 17 Eve
Father, I can feel the need coming in. Of course, start to project that he wants me to call. But this time I am not listening. Its just projection. He was projecting that I need a non commitment partner and I was projecting he wanted a commitment partner.
Like my song; if I can't have u, I don't want u baby.
Who knows, we both come to our senses. He know I don't want a non committed partner and I know he doesn't want a committed partner and we both walk away.
Aiyah. Let it be lah. I still want him but now its leaning towards need and hence I cannot call him.
Wah, can see the feeling of need going up. Feel bit constricted, bit breathless. Bit panicky, wanting to call him, like seeking shelter during swim. Feeling afraid that I won't be loved, as if he was the last chance. Needing him to prove my existence.
Mmm, now go to sleep. All in my head. I need not listen to my mind. This really require awareness and diligence to stick to my new path.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment