Finally asking for what I want

Nov 14 aft

Had a sumptuous breakfast with hot choc and Suku coffee. No coffee for me this week. I truly don't like the stimulant effect. The high is similar to being drunk from liquor. It is unpleasant high. Don't like it. I m saying no to coffee cos I don't like the negative stimulant in me. Promptly bought 4 packets of Suka coffee.

The hot chocolate was very good but I purged within two hours. Also I suddenly feel my body energy goes down and I feel faint. Went to Rejunevation to get a head and shoulder massage but not available. So quickly adjourned and took a 25 minutes dip in Teethakoon. Went I step in I was crying loads. It's been awhile since I cry.
Did my Shoonya outside Dhynalinga and went in deep.
Then adjoined for one and half hour in Dhynalinga. I went into deep meditation for one hour.

Came out bought vadai, veg puff and Suku coffee. Purged out the spice after 2 hours. Tonight will sit in the non spice section.
Met a Samyama participant. She told me that my nick name is laughing Buddha. And that the lady next to me love my laughter. This gal reminds me of myself, but at least she is aware of her issue. She is now in early twenties. She too has loads of values but not sure what is her own value.

I also found out that the cute gal and movie star look husband had gone to Linga Bhairavi and wish for a husband in Isha. She got a Facebook invite from the future husband a week after she made her request. The husband is a Christian faith from Kerala, whereas she is from North India. They met for the first time together with their parents and quickly proceeded to marriage.

Been thinking of asking for it. And today You sent a messenger, a younger version of me who also can't do Kapalvriksha and my mind made up. I will ask Linga for my husband. Remove my pride.  Mmm, perhaps that's why the small fall from the high bathroom causing me to sprain my few toes. Now is painful and I think the spray will help.

Yes, now I understand my Seven of Diamond in Mars.
Whether it is about money, or love, situations will present themselves that test our faith in the abundance of the universe. By realising and releasing our fears, we can transform our attachment into total fearlessness and personal freedom.

Soul
To know the abundance.  To ask for what I want knowing that it be granted.

I want my husband that is active in Isha practices and had good financial security and who live outside Isha ashram, preferably in my home area.
We are mutually attracted to each other, physically, mentally and emotionally and spiritually on the same Isha path. Our family accepted each other too. We have lovely time in the outer world and go for half yearly retreat into ashram.