Change ur inner energy field and it will flow out to ur world

Sept 19

D briefing was good. For the first time, Teacher shared her journey. She was also the outcast, she didn't wan to fit in. She too didn't wan to volunteer. She too was freak out like me.

I told her this year has been one amazing year. And I now my outer match my inner. If my inner is not feeling like it. I m not doing it. I shared that my friend said I am no longer loving. I told her, fuck it. So what, if m not loving, so be it. M not there yet lah.

For d first time, I felt d connection with her.
I also shared that on d same day she wrote the email, I had a tot that I wan to be Isha promoter, to share and bring this programme to the world. Cos I experienced such joy.
If she has wrote the email earlier, I wld have said no.

She said I am intuined with the Universe. I think I am.
I shared wit her that I felt so restricted n I m not bothered abt d kriya steps, I jus go wit the flow. So, worried I can't carry out the role of Sathsang leader. Also not sure if my way will work as everyone is individual. (Was thinkin perhaps its best she chose someone who follows d normal process).
Teacher said, its just that, to go with the flow.

I also shared wit her my view on sathsang. I m not as bothered abt the step, I am more focused on guiding people to the joy of meditation and once they experienced d joy, commitment will follow thru.

The fellow meditator was more concerned abt the kriya steps. But like me, he too wants d sathsang to be a joyful experience. I told him m glad that we both have the same vision for sathsang.
Amen.

When I said goodbye to Teacher n thanked her for the amazing 1 year. She said she is happy of my experience. She too believe spirituality shld be fun and not bore. I finally found myself connecting with her. Perhaps, previously I wanted to be special, perhaps was envious that she is beautiful n m not. But now, no such feeling. I see as my sister in this path.

On CEO's PA, earlier I cldnt find myself to wish her good holiday. Cos its jus me trying to be cordial. Since these days, more intune wit inner, didn't do it. Then in d evening, met her in d toilet n this time the greeting jus came out naturally, without planning. After the exchange, I too was surprised at myself.

Tot of sharing wit the meditator from Spore, "me who don't wan to fall further n now become Sathsang leader. I hav to becos there is no one else, jus me n fellow meditator and he can be travel at times, we need 2 at least.
Can jus imagine the meditator from Spore laughing at me.

Expect a miracle
We often seek out people who will fill a need in us rather than complement our higher selves.
When we are whole, we attract the same quality in another person. And so divine partnership is about finding someone who testifies to our own personal perfection rather than fostering our dependence.

Rich - this m not sure. But I wan d luxury of good food, travel and of cos, my nature house.
Smart - cos I wan someone of equal bandwith
Spiritual - cos I wan to be able to share the journey
Loving - this m not sure, cos close friend always said m not loving. M spoilt. Actually m spoilt only in terms of food n perhaps work. But I have been in control all my life n I was not loving to myself n hence got RA. But now for d first time, I m starting to love myself.
Like today n tomorrow. Previously, I wld force myself to go IE and if I cannot go, I will try 1 day and if that cannot, I wil feel guilty. Now I jus say No to both, cos its not everyday, my family is together n I recall my sis always there for me.

I do have those.

Expect a miracle
When we radiate the energy of who we are and what we want, the Universe gives us the experience that confirms our belief.
To change that which is reflected back to us, we must tweak the energy that we put out.
When we put out strong, loving feelings about our desires and ourselves, we will be recognised and answered by the powers that be with benevolence and love.

The way out is by a willingness to change, to be receptive in a whole new way, and to be in the world without being chained to ur old and familiar limitations.

Mantra - I am willing to see things differently.