Exciting about changes

Feb 2

Father, I couldn't sleep. Too much excitement and mind was working till late on Isha matters. By the time I finished, it was around 12.30 am and I know I didn't sleep and was up till about 1 am. When the alarm rang at 4 am, I was not that tired but I wasn't keen to wake up. I tried to sleep back immediately but keep on hearing the alarm in my mind and finally I slept around 40 min and woke up when alarm rang at 5 am. I was bit reluctant but I wasn't that tired. So, I woke up around 5.10 am to do guru pooja, breathe watching, followed by shakti and shambavi. I was laughing loads during aum chanting.

Yesterday Z and I had a good chat. He is finally reachable cos now he no longer put phone on silent mode. He said he found a nice ringing tone which he is comfortable. Again, an irony, when I finally accepted he is non-reachable, he now turns around. We spoke about topic of trust and he said he only trust me 50/50 as I have issue with money, I like to keep money. At first I was bit affronted cos I tot he couldn't trust me with money. Then later I realised he was talking about trusting me in being committed to him in a relationship. Well, a good sign cos at least he tot about me being with him in a permanent relationship.

I also receive good feedback from H on my 2nd book. She said it is good and she enjoyed reading and learning from my experience. I am glad this is a win win situation. I also read about Reading session for authors and I would like to attend. I wrote a story in half an hour and it was effortless, it just flow out. I wrote about knowing how we create our lives? To be truly happy is to go for things we want and not to avoid things we don't want.

Coincidentally, teacher reverted that I can sign up as an affiliate for IEO to obtain the money. That's great.

I shared with teacher about S sharing with me that I am her motivation to continue with practice. I recently also shared about C. She reverted that I should try not to let my head go big. At first I was bit affronted. Then my mind worked a bit. But alas I told myself, perhaps it is time for me to be a more big headed so I have confidence to pursue my destiny to be a Transformational leader. I recalled that M told me that I am the benchmark and I ignored it and infact I didn't like it cos that is added responsibility. But now I can see that I give inspiration to people, just like my writing inspired H.

Father, tot of my Six of Diamond in Saturn, a busy payback period. Starting new job and Isha promotions.