Feeling bit uncertain

Oct 20 mor

Just draw my weekly Osho tarot card.
Now know what is disturbing me. What I am guilty about.
After the sannidhi, I felt the onus of burden increased somewhat. Whats next in my path?
I am not transformed yet per se. I am only enjoying the energy that Sannidhi brings me in making my sadhana more effortless.
Guess thats the guilt I am feeling especially when I was still having tots of the past, of Z and Y albeit a little.
Knowing that both P and A finally got their path in Isha scheduled, I begin to wonder about me.
True I know I don't want their path, but I don't know what is my path. Me already out of the teacher's radar; no one to develop me...or not that I want to..
Alas thats my dilemma.
Part of me wonder if I should just stay on the path that others walked on eventhough I am not happy with it. Well, can't go back either way. Actually I know I can..but I am also conscious enough to know thats not what I truly want. So, can't go back.
Not sure whats next or even if there is a next. Perhaps this is just where I am' can't go further.
Or I have to find my own path as per this week Osho tarot.
Or I just go with the Flow.
What I know is I am a survivor, am true to my sadhana, has already accepted Sadhguru, already baptised with Isha.

The Issue
The Outsider

Internal influence
The Rebel

External Influence
Innocence

Whats needed for resolution?
Moment to Moment

Resolution
Awareness


Today card, truly reflective of The Outsider.
My Daily Card
The Seven of Diamonds

The Seven of Diamonds is one of the spiritual money cards. When it appears we are always confronted with how attached we are to our money and given an opportunity to experience the real prosperity that comes with an attitude of gratitude.

Whether it is about money, plans to make money, or love, situations will present themselves that test our faith in the abundance of the universe. By realizing and then releasing our fears, we can transform our attachment into total fearlessness and personal freedom.