King of Spades = The Master of ur own destiny

Jul 9 Aft

1. The Issue
The Master
The whole work of meditation is to make u aware of all that is "mind" and disidentify urself from it.
The mind, the servant is playing the role of master. And the servant is created by outside world, it follows the outside world and its laws.
Once ur awareness becomes a flame, it burns up the whole slavery that the mind has created.
Now u can do and act on only that which makes u more joyous, fulfills u, gives u contentment, makes ur life a work of art, a beauty.
There is no blissfulness more precious than freedom, than being a master of ur own destiny.

Soul
Yea, I know I can earn good money while I stay in corporate world. I know I can be financially safe and have loads of comfort. But it doesn't make me happy.
What makes me happy is my inner journey, sharing of my journey with others.

I also know promoting Isha will be one of my Top 6. So, I did it. It just took an idea and simple email. Like P said, let's volunteer myself. Once I got the deal, I will get them in for execution, the same as the yoga event.

I have send an invite to ex-colleague, D and C and also landlord S. I am opening up. Father, the last few days of turmoil and the declaration over my suffering in volunteering helps to open me up.
Thanks to P.

2. Internal influence that u r unable to see
Turning in
U r already there, there is no point in going. When going stops, journeying disappears; when desiring is no more clouding ur mind, u r in. This is called turning in. But it is not turning at all, it is simply not going out.

To develop the knack of taking a distance from the mind is one of the greatest blessings. U r ready to take this distance now, and to watch the show without getting caught up in the drama.

Soul
Mmm, it was 2 days for the mental drama. Earlier I tot I retrograde for taking so long to recover. Perhaps it was because I was advancing. The tots were there, buzzing but I didn't let it affect me so much. I wasn't really suffering. If I had, I would have reacted on it. Instead, I let it prolong until I received the text msg to call P.

I recalled that I just want to hold on to Truth - no one is out to hurt me. I am safe.

Just now, tots of rejection from Z also floats in. I ignored it.

3. External influence
Ice-olation
Tears, only the tears have the power to melt the ice. Its okay to cry, and there is no reason to feel ashamed of ur tears. Crying helps us to let go of pain, allows us to be gentle with ourselves, finally helps us to heal.

Soul
I cried on my suffering in volunteering.

4. What is needed for resolution?
Compromise
Don't be clever, otherwise u will remain the same, u will not change.

Soul
Today I decided on part time next year. And the old company can give me that.
So, I finally confirmed on the new notebook, Mc Aire.


5. The understanding.
Beyond illusion
This is the only distinction between the dream and the real: reality allows u to doubt, and the dream does not allow.

The space between the two eyes has opened, revealing the lotus of spiritual unfoldment and the rising sun of awareness.

Not to look for outside for what is real, but to look within. When we focus on externals, we too often get caught up in judgments - this is good, this is bad, I want this, I don't want that.
These judgement keeps us trapped.

Soul
I know I got 6 months to go with both companies.
I want a 3 days work next year, with 10k salary.
So for now, just do what needs to be done.