Accept my role (7)

Mar 31

Father, m getting fat. Guess this one month of food fest has taken its toil. At first wan to say isha yoga not workin, then I remember Sadhguru says 2 meals a day only. Here I eat 3 meals a day and double my pre Isha yoga days. Jus eat western set, feel good.

Jus now was wondering if I can eat all I can without gainin an inch, wld I be happy. The answer is no. Mmm, looks like dream also changing.
Today I wake up feeling refreshed, something I seldom experience. That is good.

Osho
1. Issue - Existence.
Now is the time to look at whether u r allowing yourself to receive the extraordinary gift of feeling "at home" wherever u r. If u r, savour it. If u r not n feeling d world out to get u, take a break.

Soul
I guess even wit 4 days week, m feeling bit empty, no achievement, so eat to be happy but that comes wit weight gain n make me more sad, cos like going backward.
Aiyah, jus savour dis time.
This week is qtrly report, surprisingly m fine. I guess m more familiar wit things now. The swell on left hand has reduced further.

Father, m doing my breathe n samyama meditation. Not sure of any outcome. Jus do lah. Wonder what's next.

2. Internal influence u r unable to see - Playfulness.
Life is rarely as serious as we believe it to be and when we recognise this fact, it responds by giving us more and more opportunities to play.
You are ready for the fresh and new. Something wonderful is just on the horizon, and u have just the right quality of playful innocence and clarity to welcome it wit open arms.

Soul
Not so sure. But at least on d weight, I shake it off when ego says to use weighin machine. I know my weight will go back to normal. And even if it don't, doesn't matter, am 43, I don't have to be in a shape that need approval.
(Apr 18 - weight is back to normal)

3. External influence - Guidance.
Trust ur inner guidance. In following the inner guide, u will feel more whole, more integrated, as if u r moving outwards from the center of ur being. If u go wit it, this beam of light will carry you exactly where u need to go.

Soul
Jus looked at my Passion card. Yeap, will jus focus on my personal interest. Job is jus a means.
Yeap, will follow.

4. What is needed for resolution
The dream
You look for lover, for job in order to avoid ur aloneness.
No one and no thing has any obligation to deliver ur happiness on a platter - nor could they even if they wanted to.
Real love comes not from trying to solve our neediness by depending on another, but by developing our own inner richness and maturity. Then we have so much love to give that we naturally draw lovers towards us.

5. Resolution - the understanding - Letting go.
In surrendering to gravity and slipping off the leaf, the dew drop loses its previous identity and joins the vastness of the water below. We can imagine that it must have trembled before it fell, just on the edge between the known and unknownable.
To choose this card is a recognition that something is finished - ur achievement mode that has helped to define who u r - it is time to let go of it, allowing any sadness but not trying to hold on.
Something greater is awaiting you, new dimensions are there to be discovered. You are past the point of no return now, and gravity is doing its work. Go with it - it represent liberation.

Soul
Guess I was focus on losing myself instead of focusing on joining the Universe.
This mornin, I felt a sense of connection with all the trees that I passed by. I felt we were talkin. They says they feeling refreshed after d rain. I replied me too after my shower n hair wash. They says they felt good and I replied I felt at home too.
Mmm, both cards also says new beginning. So, jus focus on me joining the Universe.
I accept my role as Helper. This mornin tot of D n instead of deliberatin, I jus asked my Intuition, how can I guide her to see her mirror. The answer came.