Courage is needed to be open in communication in relationship

Dec 11
Woke up at 4 am from left shoulder pain. Try to sleep back and then body woke up wide awake at 5 am. Doze bit and got up 5.17 am, read messages from Y.
Shoulder too painful for Surya kriya and so did asanas instead. Not good but shoulder pain affect the asanas as I can't lift up my left hand.
Breathing was okay. Shakti was good and towards the end laughing followed by singing till preparatory steps. Shambavi was good too despite the aching shoulder.
End with silence, a sweet contented silence.

Finally shared with Y my age is in fourties. Best to get it out. I know our age difference so its my responsibility. Frankly I find him perfect for me; only the age difference has to be handled. For me I can do it as there is price to pay but reading his card I don't think so. Saying that this morning I told Linga that I accepted Y and now up to Linga to get Y to accept me.

Now perhaps finally activated the Postponement card. Told him the age difference. Last week postponement was acceptance of him. This week on the disclosure. At least already out; now his call.
He just read it but may be too busy to revert.

Today card
My Daily Card
The Jack of Hearts

The Jack of Hearts is known as the 'Christ Card', or the 'Card of Spiritual Sacrifice'. Whenever it is present, you will feel and be encouraged to elevate your thinking, speaking and acting to a higher level. You may also decide to make some sort of personal sacrifice when this influence is present. This would likely be for the sake of someone younger than yourself though it can take other forms. The period position will delineate the exact nature of the sacrifice you feel impelled to make.

In any case, this card does bring a strong dose of higher, spiritual love into our lives and will encourage us to do things from a higher motive than usual.

Soul
Mmm, yeah I was acting from higher motive. Full disclosure on our age difference.
And his age is younger than me.


North node in Taurus
They were born looking for their soul mates. Their challenge in this lifetime is to focus less on bonding and more on building their values - then they will attract the right mate.

Deep in their heart, more than anything in the world, they want a soul mate - that special person to travel through life in a state of mutual vulnerability, commitment and empowerment. To have this dream comes true, they need to first experience being complete within themselves. When they no longer need another person to make them feel whole, only then will they attract the right life partner.
They feel acutely lonely sometimes, aching for their mate. They long for the comfort of consistent, dependable companionship, and this is a lifetime where loyal companionship is their birthright.

Soul
Thats why I tot Z was the one, the family man. But I forgot that I am not a family woman and hence our values are different.
These 52 days is Four for both destiny and ruling.
Now that I got my values straigthen Y comes into my life.
Honestly I feel we are just right. When we are together in tots just so right.
Just being ourselves, being vulnerable and open and empowering each other.
I can be my spiritual or intellectual self; both he can handle.
Guess him being South Node in Aquarius and my North Node in 11th house, which is also Aquarius. Yes, he has values that I am keen.
But his North Node in Leo....and my North Node in Taurus...