Good closure on the past, now focus on my Self

Dec 4 aft

Now on messages with Y on whatsapp.
This morning, I just want to share what I found about him.
Father, not sure..but now I can see him in different light.
I no longer think he is my new found partner...
I just see him as a fellow in our spiritual journey

As for my partner, he will come when I m ready.
I already got his profile
Linga is now getting him
My spiritually empowered, financially strong boyfriend will be with me in next 2 months.
Father, great to be able to use the mind consciously instead of compulsively.
Amen

Updating my blog for Nov 27 and read this
Environment Card in Destiny this year  - Nine of Diamonds
Giving up things, people or jobs that u once valued highly will bring many blessings and rewards this year.
On some level, this is a year to let go of the past and prepare to move on to many new and better things.
Usually we are afraid to let go of things in our life, afraid that the loss will deprive us of something important and essential to our happiness. However, this year u are protected, and all completions will bring u greater fortune and happiness.

Environment card in Ruling this year - Ace of Heart
This is a year when new beginnings in the area of personal relationship will bring many rewards and blessings to u.
Whether u start a new love affair or help bring a new child into this world, this is the time for u to discover just what helps u love yourself the most. This is likely to be a year of joy and pleasure, and the focus will be on you, your needs and attracting to you, other people that will fulfil you on the deepest level.

Soul
Finally everything is coming together.
Giving up Z was letting go of my South node in Scorpio.
Amen

Uranus in Fourth House
 You can realize the transcendent potential of Uranus in the Fourth House when you inwardly know that you are a stranger in a strange land, an alien in this world who has lost your way Home.  You are restless to find your source and to build a foundation for yourself that you can truly stand on.  This is a foundation built of Idea and not subject to transitory change.  To find your True Home and to build this foundation, you must seclude yourself, must protect yourself against the distractions of the mundane and reestablish yourself with the Fountain of Inspiration that lies within you.  Revelation is to be found within your own heart, for this is the place of your Real Home.

Soul
I now feel at home with the Shrine. Alas I found my resting place..
And next year will be Kailash, I am going back to my roots.

Ekhart Tolle
To know yourself as the Being beneath the thinker,
The stillness under the mental noise,
The love and joy under the pain, is freedom, salvation and enlightenment.

Soul
I now experienced it
Amen

A week ago I read this but couldn't relate
Mystic musing
Unknown to the deluded being is the wicked reign of karma, seeping into being - into every cell, predetermining how a cell, an organ or an individual behaves, controlling its breath, thought and emotion.
Untold despair befalls the seeker as he realises one day that his most prized 'freedom' is but a complex function of the karmic influences from the past.

Soul
Now I can relate..its the karma, its the unconscious that drove us to be compulsive, its the compulsion.
I started this journey because I can't let my unconscious rules me.
What I didn't realise that I had so many hidden compulsion.
Alas...finally I understood..compulsion is unconscious...
Amen
What I prized, what I resisted to let go is actually my karma, my unconsciousness, compulsions...
Now looking at my Ruling card's dream of Five of Diamonds...I finally understood.
Today, consciously taking hot lemon instead of coffee or tea cos both are also stimulants
There is so much joy swirling inside me..and I don't want the stimulants to reduce it.