Upanishad - Trust means receptivity, means loving acceptance

Nov 25
Just spend 15 minutes reading Facebook. A free interesting read today.
One is on a few insights that I already know and written; seeing loss vs gains; looking at costs vs opportunities.
Second is about God's grace comes in the form of Guru. I truly been graced.

Woke up around 3 plus am from a bad dream. This dream is about man eater that comes at night. I recalled this dream seems familiar. I had this dreams a few years ago. Long time didn't have this dream. What am I fearing? Slept back and woke up upon alarm at 4 am.
Did 5 cycles of Surya kriya, quite effortless. Now learning to focus on my breathing. Doing fine at the standing posture with head going towards the knees. Breathe fluttering on lying down asana seems okay. Alignment still bit out. Focus is on for Surya kriya. Little distraction. And when I m distracted, feet alignment be out. Breathing was nice.
Shakti was good. At first not able to focus on breathe but I persevere. Kapala Bhakti getting better. My focus is now on getting full breathe before quick exhaling. Laughing at the end and proceed to singing when I started Shambavi preparatory steps. Towards the end contentment and followed by stillness in arashidharna. Plough back was effortless. Stay for a long while savouring the stillness.
My sadhana hall is truly complete. 

Adhyatma Upanishad
The East has given religion, because it gave to the mind a base of trust. The West has given science because it gave to the mind a base of doubt.
If somebody uses trust for science, it is wrong. If somebody uses doubt for religion, it is wrong. If someone uses trust for religion, it is right. If someone uses doubt in science, it is right.
Doubt has its own capabilities. For knowing about matter, doubt has its accepted use; for knowing oneself, it is impotent. Trust has no capabilities for knowing about matter, but for knowing oneself, trust alone has the capability.

In the days of Upanishad, trust was the foundation. Trust means receptivity, trust means loving acceptance. One had to sit with the master for many years. One had to drink in the master for years, one had to live with the masters for years. Slowly, slowly, the rhythm of the master's breathing would become the rhythm of the disciple's breathing too. Slowly, slowing, the sitting and the rising of the master, the movement of the master, would become the sitting and the rising of the disciple, too. Slowly, slowly, an attunement, an inner harmony, would be created between the two, and then the disciple would know from his innermost being that the master was right. This recognition comes slowly.

Soul
It took me 5 years. Truly accepted him as my Guru.

What is needed for resolution
Schizophrenia
The only way out of this dilemma is, unfortunately, to let go of both at once. You can't work your way out of this one by solving it, making lists of pros and cons, or in any way working it out with your mind. Better to follow your heart, if you can find it. If you can't find it, just jump--your heart will start beating so fast there will be no mistake about where it is!

Soul
No more doubt, sadhana hall all completed with Dhynalinga big picture, Dhynalinga yantra, Linga Bhairavi and Sadhguru picture, complete with my copper pot and jeevarasa.
I also declared in facebook that I have been graced by God, I got my Guru - Sadhguru.
Thats my value and I am declaring it. No more waivering due to others.

Alas, this week Osho tarot's resolution card unveils:

The Master
In the eyes of the Master, a disciple finds his own truth reflected. In the silence of the Master's presence, the disciple can fall more easily into the silence of his own being. The community of seekers that arises around a Master becomes an energy field that supports each unique individual in finding his or her own inner light. Once that light is found, the disciple comes to understand that the outer Master was just a catalyst, a device to provoke the awakening of the inner.

Soul
Today, sitting in silence...
and this week, knowing coffee is truly stimulant...
everything is falling into place.
As I was driving, I suddenly can see that it was Sadhguru who led me into the relationship with Z. He helped me to go in. When it was to end, Sadhguru did help me to end...but my own karma of Two of Diamonds holds on longer than necessary. And perhaps the mind said that Sadhguru helped me to go in..so how can it fails..alas, it may not be failure..but it is success. Success cos I stayed in...success cos I hold on...
And then it was time to let go...
Father, truly ended.
A past tot did come in, but I waived it off with "new leaves'..

This week Osho tarot's card
The Issue
MiserBecause things are not the target, you, your innermost being, is the target--not a beautiful house, but a beautiful you; not much money, but a rich you; not many things, but an open being, available to millions of things.
Soul
The relationship was not the target. The target was me. I needed the relationship with Z to open the sexuality in me; to let me dissolve my Seven of Hearts, Seven of Clubs, Seven of Spades and lastly Two of Diamonds.
Only in ending, the Two of Diamonds can be acknowledged and dissolved.

What to do
The Lovers
Actually the biggest "problem" with sexual love is that it never lasts. Only if we accept this fact can we then really celebrate it for what it is - welcome its happening, and say good-bye with gratitude when it's not. 

Then, as we mature, we can begin to experience the love that exists beyond sexuality and honors the unique individuality of the other. We begin to understand that our partner often functions as a mirror, reflecting unseen aspects of our deeper self and supporting us to become whole. 

This love is based in freedom, not expectation or need. Its wings take us higher and higher towards the universal love that experiences all as one.

Soul
Alas, can finally say goodbye with gratitude on the ending with Z.

Today's 7thunder card
My Daily Card
The Seven of Spades

The powerful Seven of Spades will challenge you to rise to higher levels of thinking, speaking and acting. Its challenges will manifest mainly in the areas of work and health, areas where you are likely to be holding some negative patterns that need to be changed. If you are willing to take responsibility for your condition and practice positivity in spite of circumstances, you can realize the powerful spiritual potential of this card and attain new heights. In its highest form, this is the card of FAITH.

Soul
This is Z's destiny card.
Yeap, he was in my mind..and finally I have found my Faith within me.
Amen