Cosmic Lesson (23) - opening last mental door

Feb 25 Eve

Father, ego is cracking cos its 8.30 pm and he didn't call back. I no longer want to take it personally. He will call me back when he can.

He could have a meeting or need to sleep before he talk to me. Like D said he must find it very refreshing and that I am such a good find, cos I am open.
Ego I still ticking. But my decision is made. He is my life time and spiritual cosmic lesson. My role is to change me. Anyway, my decision is made.

Aiyah. He is probably exhausted. If he doesn't call, perhaps I just let it be. I am not sure I want to pursue it. Remember this is lifetime cosmic. Who knows, maybe its giving more time. I could have been bit impulsive.

Anyway, main thing is I have decided to be with him, to go out with him.

Yea, that's it. Thanks for granting my wishes. I must remember I tend to be negative when it come to anything triggering my abandonment issue. So, I wish for an alternative positive tot. I need not make it at my timing. Who knows, the Universe knows best. Mmmm, suddenly tot of boss. Whenever she recovered when she wants, she expects others too.

Z just called me. It turn out that the battery is dead. When he switched his phone on, he saw my text and he called me immediately.

Father, I was bit shy when he called and I told him I wanted to pull back my sharing. And I find myself breathless. I like that he was concerned and asked if I am ok or not. I took a deep breathe and said I was fine. But now not sure if I wanted to share. Besides I said he is tired. He said we always do our sharing and he wanted to hear me out.
(That's true. He and I always share everything.)

I told him and he understood. He made me laugh. Anyway, net net, I told him that I would stop running and I stay put.
He joked and says why can't I enjoy first and then run if I want to.

He says don't take life so seriously. When we think, we have to see the positive side. The reason he is able to have courage to proceed is because he always give positive energy to me.
He says our problem is all in our mind. I told him that he is now my guide. Whenever I am thinking too much, I will always remember him, his life and how he turned it around, his real life problem and it always brought things into perspective for me.
Somehow my mind problem becomes insignificant.

I asked if he thinks I am crazy. He said nope. He just think he need to align me.

He asked me again when I am leaving. He wanted to see me.
He teased me and I was bit shy and asked him to take shower instead. He is always 100 steps ahead. This time I told him that I am shy now, but I think I will be as open as him in future.