Facing my karma in relationship (38) - worst is over

Feb 23 Aft

Father, I am feeling the body pain again. How? I asked how...logically I should back out. Why put myself with someone not into me? A tot came, he did call u back last night...yea nearly midnite.

Father, how lah. Maybe I should just let it pass. We pretend this never happen, we never connected.

Father, I really want to overcome this. How?? A tot came ; don't use the head.

And u know what. I know he won't call me and expect me to call him. I tot he was a player and know how to handle gal. Looks likes its the gal handling him.


Feb 23 Eve
Father, he finally told me that he do like me too. We have cleared all our doubts. Like he said all our inner doors are open up.

I also told him my fear that he is unavailable as work comes first and to him, his partner is last in his priority list. Logically I should just ask him to fly kite. And especially now when I want to have a companion but he is not available.
But now I am doing meditation, I am not afraid. Also, he is a good man and I want him. So, I am staying put.

He told me he never had any expectation of meeting someone in the group. Its fated that we meet and liked each other and he wants us to explore.

Like he said we have settled all our internal issue and now we only need to handle external. The deal is done.

He asked me if I have a favourite pet name that I want to be called. I told him none. He is so funny, he jokingly asked me to call him Robert De Niro and we have a good laugh :). That's show he really like me and its not a short term thing.

He said our rship starts with a bang on our 'first' date. I was angry with him and later he was angry with me and didn't want to have anything to do with me. But even then he knew there is something between us. He recalled that he started to like me when we sat very near together during the 'class', when he did translation for me. Alas I know we have something on.

Father, what a turn around.