Still having tots of Z...I am determined in letting go

May 18
My menses is delayed. I must be stressed by the pgm. Slept about 1 am yesterday. Woke up at 7 am, took a quick shower and run off for breakfast as got Shakti refresher.
Had a tot of Z. But I decided its enough. Lets be objective. I didn't lose a real diamond. He may be an uncut diamond but he is not willing to be cut. So, no real loss for me.
I got so many things right for me. Why ponder over an uncut diamond.
Why keep thinking of Past? Why don't I spend time on opening myself up to my true partner instead? 

Lao Tzu
If u r depressed, u r living in the Past
If u r anxious, u r living in the Future
If u r peaceful, u r living in the Present.

Soul
Timely reminder. I was living in memories and false hope because I love Z. I love him but he is not here. I can either cling on or locked the door and move on.
Mmm, suddenly I recalled that's my Osho card - breakthrough.
I had enough of living on memories and false hopes of Z.
I got so much love and joy in me. I closed the door. He was never the cut diamond. I can help him but his insecurity can't allow it.
Father, I had enough of Z. I have given him enough time for my false hopes. I had enough of myself pining over him with my memories and imagination.


Osho's
What is needed for resolution?
Traveling Life is a continuity always and always

When this card appears in a reading, it indicates a time of movement and change. It may be a physical movement from one place to the next, or an inner movement from one way of being to another. The Traveling card also reminds us to accept and embrace the new, just as when we travel to another country with a different culture and environment than the one we are accustomed to. This attitude of openness and acceptance invites new friends and experiences into our lives.


 Soul
Z is not the end for me. I m to walk further on my own. New friends and experiences will come when I open up.

Resolution - Breakthrough

All of us occasionally reach a point when "enough is enough." At such times it seems we must do something, anything, even if it later turns out to be a mistake, to throw off the burdens and restrictions that are limiting us. If we don't, they threaten to suffocate and cripple our very life energy itself. 

If you are now feeling that "enough is enough," allow yourself to take the risk of shattering the old patterns and limitations that have kept your energy from flowing. In doing so you will be amazed at the vitality and empowerment this Breakthrough can bring to your life.

Soul
Father, I m responsible for making myself sad over Z. I take responsibility and change this. I woke up to the beautiful present.