Hiccups along the path..and to renew committment

Nov 13

Father, I slept around 2 am yday. Body woke up around 6 am but I slept back and wake up after alarm rang at 7.30 am. Was feeling bit tired. Did have some resistance but I remember that Sadhguru said only people with certain intelligence will do their sadhanas. Also, some worrying tots of office came in and so I knew I had to do my sadhanas. I started around 7.40 am and finished about 10 am. I felt much better. Went for breakfast with my family and then adjourned to new shopping centre.


Nov 13 aft
Today spend lovely time with my family. Fulfilling my Top 5. There were bit of tots on Z but I am fine. Just now when tots of him comes, I just remind myself I deserve a committed rship.

Father, Sadhguru's msg about commitment to sadhanas even if life situations are ok is meant for me. He said only some people are intelligent to be committed to their sadhanas when they are in 'heaven'. Most people need to be in 'hell' before they r committed. Tot of Z letting go of shambavi because he is over his depression. I don't want to make the same mistakes.

There were some worrying tots on the company's results. But I remember I am just a small fry and need not take up such responsibilities.

Just now when I watched the movie, a point I note is the part the Father looks at her daughter lovingly, feeling proud of her. I tot of Z and his plan for children. Father, I cannot deny him his dreams. He is not asking a lot. I dont' mind making his dream comes true but alas I am too old..already in peri-menopause...

Eight Letter
When people first come on to the spiritual path and seek a 'Higher Power', many are taught by 'self-help' teachers to engage in magnetic-emotional bonding tots to a greater degree, although such teachers have no idea that their instructions are serving to strengthen the power of the ego. The focus on "having faith" and on getting what they want or need. At the beginning of their change in consciousness and the exercise of their faith, they do indeed feel great benefits. The desired objects do come into their lives, they find doors opening, they achieve success. This phenomena reveals that the material planes of their consciousness are becoming more spiritualised and as a result there are improvements in them. Life is less hard.

But ur lives are meant to express every level of ur consciousness _ mind, emotions, body.

When u have mastered the physical realms of consciousness, ur next adventure into spirituality is in the realm of ur emotions. Therefore, suddenly, in the midst of ur plenty, the winds blow and the rains fall upon previously stable emotional consciousness, creating manifold miseries of every kind. These can be loss of family, health or possessions, sudden setbacks of numerous kinds in numerous areas of ur life. It is at these times, that so many lose their previous faith. 'Positive Thinking doesn't work!', they affirm.

It can be a time of tremendous inner growth and a movement into happiness or an ongoing time of bitterness and resentment. This is the time to wake up fully and realise that the outcome of the experiences are entirely up to u - not fate or destiny - but u - either working on ur own or devotedly and consistently with Divine Consciousness arriving eventually at the height of felicity.
It is at this time also, that a person is challenged to use the mind constructively, reaching for the highest insights and ideals with which to master the emotions.

The difference between re-active tot - arising from impulsive ego responses to uncomfortable situations - and creative, intelligent, thoughtful tot, will become clear. When this takes place - and the insight is put into daily practice - self mastery is close at hands

Soul
Father, thank you for sending the Letters to me. Yea, I faced a down time...but I am slowly but surely coming back. I know my body is back...now my emotion have to follow