My destiny - to formulate a new identity (from Ruling of Ace of Diamonds to Destiny Queen of Diamonds)

Sept 25
Woke up middle of night with pain on left shoulder. Slept back and later woke up at 3.55 am.
Slowly will go back to 3.45 am so I can sing guru pooja.

Truly glad of uncovering my issue in personal relationships. Actually looking back, my resentment on leading local Isha was also due to suppression of my anger.
Truly double whammy. I already got Mars in Libra and then with Mercury in Cancer; no wonder I suppressed.
Now its looking at my unconscious blue print and deciding for conscious behavior in my personal rships.

Saturn in Aries

In past lives
Karmically ur destiny is to formulate a new identity. An entire cycle of ego expression through an old sense of self has ended and that ego has dissolved. This is why u feel so vulnerable in this life time:
U have no instinctive ego to serve as a buffer against the environmental stimuli. Thus, there is a tendency to overreact or to under react when asserting urself because u don't yet have proper foundation.

Due to past lives karma, task:
To rise above the limitations of past life personality expressions, to discover and formulate a new, more powerful sense of identity.

Father, now I know why Ruling
Long range in Ace of Clubs
Pluto in Queen of Spades
Result in Nine of Clubs

Results in Nine of Clubs
Much of ur challenges is to let go of outworn ideas, projects, plans or way of communicating. This is a year of completion that may at times seem like disappointing endings.
The Nine of Clubs says that u are completing a major chapter in ur life and it is time to move on to greener pastures.
Be open to spiritual wisdom in all forms, as this will help make change easier.

Affirmation
I complete projects this year and let go of the past. I broaden my understanding by releasing old ways of thinking.

Soul.
So true. Amen.
Can never imagine myself have the Sannidhi, keeping a temple in my room. Others who know me well too can't imagine it. Alas it happens, for a few days I was uncertain but now the Sannidhi and I are fine together. No longer feel stressed at having to take care of it, as I just do my best willingly.

Uranus in 4th house
Habitual tendency - demanding independence by rebelling against close relationships.
Result - u may rebel for the sake of asserting a false sense of emotional freedom and self-centered independence. This results in feeling instability about ur roots and constantly disruption from loved ones.

Conscious expression
U know how to uniquely express ur individuality through ur talent to be sensitive to people's needs. U can be impersonally loving enough to allow those who are emotionally close to be free from debilitating dependency.
If u choose this road, the result is a sense of personal emotional freedom that allows u to be truly urself, even in close rships.

Soul
That's my dream.