Sadhguru
Question: Is there such a thing as soul mate?
To some extent, the process of mating belongs to the body and the mind. The soul cannot mate with anything, nor does the soul need a mate because it is absolute and boundless. Only what is limited needs a mate in order feel a little better.
If you choose a mate because you want your body to feel a little better, we call that sexuality, and it can be quite beautiful. If we choose a mate because we want our minds to feel a little better, we call that companionship. If we want our emotions to feel better, we call that love. Experiencing good physical compatibility, companionship and a strong sense of love can make your life very wonderful in many ways, but if you are willing to look at all this very carefully and sincerely, you cannot deny the limitations with which they exist and the anxiety that naturally follows such arrangements.
Though it is quite a fortune for a human being to find someone who is physically, mentally, and emotionally compatible, the limitedness of even that arrangement invariably becomes suffocating if you are unwilling to settle for the limited.
To have such a pleasant arrangement is like living in a beautiful garden. Every human being wants to have this, but this is not a matter of the soul. All the connections you make this way are either of the body, mind or emotions. You cannot connect anything else this way. It is extremely important that we understand the limitations with which we are living and try to make the best of them for now, and then see how we can go beyond our limitations tomorrow.
If you do not understand the limitations of your relationship, it gets greatly decorated, but when it crashes it becomes so ugly you cannot even walk out of it gracefully. It becomes ugly simply because you tell many lies to yourself and to the other person. It is better to be straight, at least with yourself. Even if your partner lacks the necessary maturity for you to be 100 percent straight with him or her, you must at least be straight with yourself.
It is very, very important to be straight with yourself; otherwise, life won't work right. And if you are very straight with yourself, you will see through things very easily. There are lots of things that people think are important that won't matter to you or even make much sense to you.
The more sincere you are with yourself, the clearer you will see things and the less melodrama you will create in order to make your life more intense and interesting. Without all the melodrama, you will become freer and freer, and you will quickly become less entangled. You will cut away one encumbering rope at a time. Then you will rise to higher and higher elevated realities.
If you do not become absolutely straight with yourself, it may take a lifetime to deal with every little thing that disturbs you before you finally come to the point where you realize that all your worry is not getting you anywhere. That is a waste of your time -- and of life.
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