Dilemma over letting go of Isha is over

Apr 3 Aft

Father, I replied to N's email on the charity and said that Home School is for privilege children and hence don't need charity.

Firstly, a bombard from N, which I didn't like. I hope teacher would tell him to back off. Instead teacher followed with another email to reiterate and support him.

At first I felt bit hurt by teacher because of my expectation.
Then another tot came, looks like I have hit a nail as it seems to be a sensitive topic. I am sure many others also think as I do since they felt a need to defend the Home School.

They are both really alike. Guess that's why they hold to each other like glue. Also the issue on Pg's volunteers is the cement for both of them. Real crooks.

I have been there a couple of time and met a couple of parents. They all are rich and told me the fees are expensive but they are willing to pay for the good of their children.

Father, I won't take it personally. But neither do I want to reply. I just want out from the group. I am fine if they want to outcast me as I don't even want to volunteer.

Father, my rship has ended. The day I don't even want to reply has come. And I am not even angry, I just don't want to be in their group.

Father, I just wrote a msg to K that I may not attend meetings this week. Now that my mind is made up, decision is much clearer and there is no more dilemma. Thanks to N and teacher for tilting me to the edge of the cage.

Finally, I am feeling much better. What I valued is the silence from meditation. For that I m grateful to Sadhguru, Vijii and Thillai. They r in my daily prayers. As for Isha organisation, it is not my cup of tea. I was never attached to the activities nor the Dhyanalinga nor Teethakhoon nor Linga B. The place I miss most is Vijii's cemetery and also the guru pooja session. I am also not attached to Sadhguru's form.

I just realised that I was saying my goodbyes to P and C yday and now to K. I will help, but will be behind the scene. I am helping because of our friendship.

Freedom by Osho
Meditation is nothing but the destruction of all these fetters and conditioning, the destruction of the whole prison so that u can again be free under the sky and the stars, out in the open, available to existence.

The moment u r available to existence, existence is available to u. And the meeting of those two availabilities is ultimate bliss. But it can happen only in freedom. Freedom is the highest value.

Soul
My Internal Influence card for the week.
Suddenly a tot occurred to me. I am a Queen, Queen in my own rights. I have gone thru so much to be where I am today. I don't need nor want to report to another queen, another conditioning. I am free, I don't want to be conditioned again. Amen.

I am with Isha but not of it. I am in its substance, but not of its form.