Old fear on lack of money

Mar 17

Diamond Heart 1
If a person instinct for survival is distorted because of a certain childhood experiences, he might become fearful that he won't be able to provide enough for himself.
He feel insecure because of something that has happened in his childhood that interfered with and blocked the energy.

Soul
Suddenly tot of my need to have high saving. As a child I recalled dad was so poor that there is no money to pay the Tricycle man and I had to sit behind. We were so poor that mom let sis go to work as a 'maid'.
I told myself I must have good saving to feel secure. I want to know I never need to 'beg'. That's why money in hand makes me feel better than the drain of money going out. I guess I wasn't looking for growth.
Suddenly tot of Z and his no saving. He spend to the last dollar and will wait till his next one comes in. That triggers me and I told him. Anyway, the way to handle is for me to hold my money so I remain unshaken.

Diamond Heart 1
Insecurity has nothing to do with how much you've got; it has to do with a basic feeling in ur unconscious. Security issues can revolve around various things - money, power and friends. People are usually very identified with their feelings of insecurity and will do almost anything to try to fill that hole rather than simply feel it. Thus the feeling can't be addressed.

21 April
True. I wanted to buy a VW, costing RM100k plus. It seems a good buy if I am going to buy my brother's 2 years car at RM70k and I think the VW is better than City. Also I didn't like the colour.
I know I can easily afford it but part of the on-going fear returned. The fear of not having more money comes in eventhough I am secure.
Of course, part of me tot that I know I will be working for the next few years and why can't I buy myself something nice...
The voice said, well, you did, you renovate your room and bathroom for RM25k just recently and now you are thinking of commitment...