Make friends with our practices/meditation

May 29 eve
Father, Mmm the meeting was cordial.
I told them I don't want to be overall lead. I don't mind doing Sathsang and its related events but I m not doing others.
I tried to bring up issues from M and R but was waived off. So, not sure lah.
Anyway, at least I got myself released from overall lead.
I told P that she should take IE. she said will consider. I tried to bring up that R is not happy with matters. But she said R is fine. So, let it be. At least IK is not my baby.
Good thing was C said she will be back as her biz deal is coming up. I m not sure.
Anyway I be off to ashram in mid July; so can chill out.

But my mind is saying something not right. Never mind la.

On Sathsang guide, I feel J is great. Also, its a good change for us. But C feels I m trying to push off guide. I just said m not the suitable candidate and the better one to do. C said she will be back. Hope so. But we do need fresh injection.

Mmm, now I know my disturbance. I feel not in control. I feel meeting no results. Only thing resolved is I don't want to be overall lead. I was caught off guard by C saying she will be back. Anyway, good thing.


Be the change
The important point is to make friends with our practices. It will be of no help at all if we feel we have to meditate, for instance, and then feel guilty if we miss the allotted time or only do ten minutes when we had promised to do thirty. It is much better to practice for just a few minutes and to enjoy what we are doing than to make ourselves sit there, teeth gritted, because we have been told that only thirty or even forty minutes will have any affect.
Meditation is a companion for us to have throughout our life, like an old friend we turn to when in need of direction and clarity. It is to be enjoyed!

Soul
Exactly my sentiment. That's why I have no guilt on my practices. I even have a sabbatical day on Sunday. To me, its more important to enjoy it, to be its friend rather than to be precise.

Be the change
Krishna Das
Meditation gives us a taste of what it feels like to feel good for no reason at all, and the more we do it, the less our happiness depends on external things and the more happiness deepens inside us. It is just so cool because it works

Soul
My sentiment exactly

 Father, I now know why I m bit disturbed. As J said I don't want to do correctly cos I m afraid to 'fly'.
Isn't that resistance too? 
I guess I don't see the benefit to fly. So much unknown.
A tot came, u r similar to F who is afraid to go beyond.