Neptnue cards - clouds my perception

Jun 25 eve
Father, today I was less reactive. It is a humbling day.
I was exasperated with E but I recalled that it was my Neptune that has clouded me and the fact that we are karmic cousin and me being his Cosmic Rewards card, I calmed down.
But I did express my dissatisfaction with my staff.

Just now Shoonya and Shamyama was fine. But the silence thereafter was sweet. I just want to sit and savour myself. So contented.

Today I didn't take lunch, just don't feel like eating. I just had orange juice.
When I was having my dinner I saw the nice looking pork dish. But I didn't eat cos its not worth the price. Besides my body frame has reduced. I m back to my weight before I had Z. I like my body now.
Sadhguru is right, two meals a day is enough. Although I skipped lunch, I didn't have any increased appetite for dinner.

I will continue to read The Power of Now when I do compilation of book tomorrow. Now starts with Krishna by Osho. I read this just a month before I did IE in 2008. Near coming to five year, so good to read again especially since I watched the Leela DVD.

Krishna by Osho
Transcendence is only possible when u choicelessly accept both parts together. Krishna accepts duality, the dialectics of life altogether and therefore transcends duality.

Spirituality accepts and unreservedly accepts, all the dimension of life. It accepts sex and attachment together, relationship and indulgence, love and devotion, yoga and meditation, and everything there is to life.

Soul
I want all.

Krishna by Osho
The truth is, we can only change our friends; the question of changing those we treat as enemies simply do not arise. There is no way to even understand our enemy; it is just impossible.

Soul
That was my tot on E today. No point antagonising him, it will only aggravate and prolong the pain. Disarm him instead.

Krishna by Osho
Nietzsche says a tree that longs to reach the heights of heaven must first sink its roots go. If u want to ascend to the skies u will have to descend into the abyss as well.

Soul
I know. That's why I m not afraid to go in deep.
That's what I told M, to go beyond the surface but she doesn't want. Suddenly a tot occur, perhaps she can't. So, let her be. 

Father, today I can see the similarities between P and S. Both of them raised voice whenever they feel defensive.