North Node in Taurus - requires physical affection

Jun 13 aft
North node in Taurus
They are generally highly sexual. They seek the intensity and excitement of sex and the bonding that is possible through a sexual connection.

Soul
Before I was with Z. I never knew that I was sexual. But I do recall that I was playful when I was a child. Then the incident happen and sexuality clamped up for many years till Z.
Z has given me the gift of sexuality back. I tot I lost it forever but he brought it back. Guess part of the reason I hold on was because I tot I can only be sexual with him. I tot losing  him means losing my sexuality.

North node in Taurus
They need lots of physical affection: kissing, hand holding, touching, massaging - really tuning in to how the other person's hands feel on their skin and how their nervous system responds to the other person, strictly on a bodily level.
They will not want to pursue a romantic relationship that has no lasting substance on the physical level.
In this incarnation, they are learning to appreciate the gift of sensual pleasure with their partner, without any other motive.  They are learning simple pleasure of life - food, sex, being comfortable  - enjoyment of the physical pleasures that are the gifts of having a human body.

Soul
Before Z I wouldn't have agreed. But I agreed now. That's why I hold on to Z. With Z, our bodily connection is effortless. It just happen without much doing. My body craves for his touch. He too said he misses my body.
Perhaps that's why I hold on.

Taurus in north node
Loyalty and commitment are very important to them. They do not generally "play around"; they want someone to go through life with, a partner who feels the same way.
Loyalty involves integrity and a commitment by both people to work on the issues rather than giving up. They need to feel that the other person will be there, so when they become fully invested in the bond, they won't have the rug pulled out from them.
They need to acknowledge "loyalty" is important to them and to express it.

The idea is to move the give and take of the relationship out of the realm of expectation and into the realm of open disclosure, verbalising what is important to them as the rship progresses. Then they can determine whether both partners want to meet each other's needs and make each other happy on the consistent basis that they need.

Soul
While I felt financially insecure with Z, I felt emotionally secure with him. But alas it is not real.
True loyalty was not our deal when we first started. But after one year plus, I tot we have it and felt secure about us. Alas, he pulled the rug out from me.

Yea, I forgot about our deal. I didn't forget but I don't want to let it cloud us and I just
 ignored it; whereas Z didn't. And worse still I didn't express my wants until after the break up.