Existential mode - trees are lovely

Aug 29
Woke up 4.22 am, body was good. Tot of my sister in my room. So I tot better skip hata so lights won't wake up too early. I slept back and wake up 5.20 am.
Decided not to switch on main light as I got the salt lamp light. Room was lightly dim.
Did one cycle of Surya kriya, was good. At the second breathing, it was non stop. Breathe just happen by itself. Didnt do breathing. Shakti was good and I was singing in my mind when it ended. Shambavi was good too. Body is moving non stop from Suka kriya. Head was shaking non stop for breathe fluttering. I didnt want to end it. Towards the end of Shambavi head was shaking non stop, contented silence in arda shidharna posture, without any stress on the spine.

Tots of past comes in and I finally decided that I m truly well, just my mind putting up last minute fight. I thank the past cos I m now more determined than ever to end my mind.

As I was driving I saw all the lovely trees on the road side. I thanked them for being the barometer of my energy level. As I was driving, little tots. Just was in the existential mode. Amen.