Feeling bit low

Sept 6 Eve

Father, firstly I was surprised by C's email that she take over this month. She could have just reply my sms. I also didn't like the way she put it as if we discussed in length.

Yea, C's mail was not so ok. But I guess T over-reacted and jumped on it. T said since I don't want to be Sathsang guide, I might as well don't keep the dvd. A few minutes later she tone down and retract her email. Her defense mechanism really fast.
On me, I too was like her. But my reaction was sadness rather than anger. Anyway, I saw her second mail and saw she making amends.

Father, I realise I am now at my low point. And with Sl keep on saying how good is E and how they are aligned makes me feel bit 'off' and unwanted. Then I recall that she was like that too with her ex-boss.

Just saw Z change his BB messenger. He went to Bird park with his children and took a pix of peacock with full-blown feathers. I miss him and I cried a bit.

I recalled just now after finishing my samyama, I wish him love. I still love him even though we r no longer together.

E and I. I miss him too. We r both aligned on biz but our values are different. Venus and Mars. Since we are not aligned, Mars will come out more.