Z trying to avoid me

Aug 22 Eve

Father, I called him and he is at home. Trying to be funny with me. I called him twice and he makes fun by pretending his phone is spoilt and he cannot hear me. Well, he is fine. I don't have to call him.

I was bit miffed and I didn't call him a third time. He quickly send a msg to say his phone got problem. Frankly I don't believe him. I think he is not ready to talk. He wants to buy time. He knows that I am ready to walk away if he gives me another trigger and so he is biding his time until he knows what he wants.

His dilemma; he wants me to stay but he cannot accede to us growing into a committed relationship. He wants to have his cake and eat it too. Well, I can now see his childishness. Then I am childish too. We both are.

Osho
The seeker is inside - but because the light is outside, the seeker starts moving in an ambitious way, trying to find something outside that will be fulfilling. It is never going to happen. It has never happened. It cannot happen in the nature of things because u don't know the seeker. Without knowing the seeker, how can u move in the right dimension, in the right direction? It is impossible.

First, make it absolutely clear to urself what ur object is. Don't just go on stumbling in darkness.