I am LOVE. I need not be lovable

Sept 9 aft

I am LOVE. I need not be lovable.
Perhaps I have been barking at wrong door. Keep on asking myself to confirm my lovability. So that I can confirm that I am lovable. 
Actually I am LOVE.
Others has always tot of my high tolerance level and patience for difficult people. My capacity to forgive and forget. To give chances to people who hurt me.

Earlier I tot it was just a validation issue. But more than that it was LOVE in me. Most time I do I effortlessly. To me everyone deserve new chance. Everyone deserved love. Because I m LOVE.
I no longer need to ponder over my lovability or to find proof that I m lovable to others. To be lovable is at the receiving end cos don't have.
To be love is at giving end cos we have.

That's why I m able to see Z and wife. To give them the friendliness. It is because I have. I wouldn't hurt them. I may hurt myself. But not them. And when I m hurt I see that the suffering as blessing and I find my way out. Father, I m truly great being. I salute my Self. Feeling overwhelm and tears came.

Father, finally acting out the Ace of Spades in Venus period.

My 52-Day Period Card
The Ace of Spades

The Ace of Spades means a SECRET of some kind. This card was the emblem for many of the secret societies of old, being the 'key to the mysteries'. As such, it represents the 'truth that lies behind the veil of illusion'. So, it has often been the symbol for the study and pursuit of esoteric knowledge and mystical wisdoms.
The Ace of Spades is also one of the traditional cards for death, change and transformation. With this mystical card in your spread, it is certain that you will go through some sort of death and rebirth, or at the least, some important and powerful changes.

Soul
Just did my afternoon Shoonya. It was explosive. I was crying loads for all the years of misguided belief that I was suffering because i m always the one that has gives love; that I m the one God didnt love as he made me the Giver of Love.
I cried cos feel bad for misguided belief thinking that we need love. After loads of crying I laughed.
Moments later guru pooja - Karpura Gauram came to me; singing in my mind again and again. Later Stillness comes in.

Father, this morning I asked for further affirmation. U just given to me.
People used this say this about me - that I don't need to be protected by others. That I self protect. Actually correct term is self love.
Giving is Having
Giving love is having love
I m LOVE.

No wonder I saw love in C and was envious of it. I told her too. She said we are love. I couldn't see it then but now I can. I truly can see myself as LOVE.

Father, now I know why the past relationship is on my face. Its to see how much love I have. This is so unexpected.
I m glad I didn't follow my emotion and wallow. Instead I remain firm and asked for answer. And I got it today.

Saturn in Ruling life spread
Nine of Hearts  - personal rship  are challenging and disappointing but contacts with the public can be a source of fulfilment and joy.
It may be that u are involved in a heavy karmic relationship. One that is destined to teach u much about urself and ur love nature.

Soul
I FOUND OUT I AM LOVE.