North Node in Taurus - I want total and permanent commitment and hence love affair with Existence is safest best

Sept 13 aft

Just checked my blog for updates and saw this journal being viewed by others. This journal on North Node was written back in Sept 26, 2011.

North node in Taurus
What they really want is to merge with someone else's energy and feel mutual empowerment. They are looking for total, permanent commitment. They want a partner whom they can count on to take care of all their material needs and they will take care of all the partner's emotional needs (vice versa) - a synergistic relationship that is mutually empowering and completely dependable.

They must be discriminating and find someone with similar energy and values. The shared goals must be innately valuable to each of them as individuals.

For this to happen, they must first get in touch with their own values. They must become strong in themselves, aware of what they want, and tune in to what is real and meaningful for them.

Their challenge is to establish their own energy systems and figure out who they are as individuals. As their energy becomes stronger, they will automatically attract mates of similar energy with whom they can form successful partnership.

Soul
Earlier I just wrote that with my low parameters, it is safest to merge with Existence.
This reading on North Node in Taurus further reaffirm that.
Great that Eight of Diamonds is finally happening to me.

North Node in Taurus
Because they have extinguished their own value system, they came into this lifetime with no sense of self-worth apart from the feedback of others. This makes them incredibly vulnerable to adopting the values of those around them.
 Although it was correct in the past, in this incarnation it is not set up to work when they focus on empowering their partner with the silent expectation that the partner will take care of them financially or validate them in some other way.
 In this lifetime they are learning to build a sense of self esteem directly, by living according to their own value system.
 They need to empower others only when it is what they want to do, it fits with their own values and they have no expectation of getting anything in return.

They have a tendency to be distracted by others wants and motives. They need to simplify things: to stop "getting into other people's minds" and just get in touch with themselves. "What do I need here? What do I need in order to feel comfortable with this situation?".

What these folks really want is for their insecurity to be resolved - to know that all their needs will be met.

Soul
Exactly on the spot with my Ace of Diamonds in Ruling with lack of strong values. And thats why I have a few Eight of Diamonds with me and lots of Eights of Clubs and Eight of Spades.
Back in 2011, the real impact didn't hit as I was still bit doubtful but now it is exactly.
Yeas, I need to express and not silently expect. I need to assert my right to a good and mutually satisfying relationship.


North Node in Taurus
They are destined to accumulate that which increases their inner sense of abundance.
Their challenge is to slow down long enough to receive the gifts that life offers.

By taking emphasis of specific people as their "source" and by partnering directly with life itself, their insecurities over survival can finally be healed. They will find that life sends the right people - who often show up unexpectedly - to ease their journey as every new need arises.

Soul
Yeas, confirmed that my right Partner now is to be with Existence, Life.
And true enough, just went I needed, the right books will come into my life.
Yesterday, Osho - Nanak was the life saver.
Father, I just started on the book yesterday. It was quite mystical, and I recall I was not able to identify fully though recognising its importance.
I think now I can as I am going to have A LOVE AFFAIR with Existence. Amen.


North node in Taurus
The first step toward self-acceptance for Taurus North Node people is to acknowledge that there is a needy person inside and to take personal responsibility for filling those needs.
If they try to appear self-sufficient and suppress that needy part, it will come out full-blown to make itself recognised. They have denied and postponed their own needs in so many incarnations that now the needy part is overenergised.
And that is to their advantage, they have earned the right to embrace and encompass that part of themselves.

Soul
Alas.
Only started to do that in the last few months; starting with parental mode friends like S, P, La and teachers. Amen.
I learned that people who 'shout' the most are not gospel truth and I need not be led by them.

I can now learn that I need to express myself in personal relationship. I must assert my rights to a good relationship.
And I just did that with Z yesterday telling how I feel that he and wife back in my space.
I too need time and space; just like when his ex-wife divorce him.
Also I only let go of him in June this year; whereas he let me go in Sept last year.
 I can now learn that I need to express myself in personal relationship.
I must assert my rights to a good personal relationship; just like I assert my right in professional relationship.
Alas, I AM TRULY HERE.