Cosmic Lesson - relationship

Oct 2 Eve
Was browsing thru my notes and saw this;

Who are the famous figures whom u admire?

Soul
Carl Jung - finding his own path and leading others.
Osho - finding his own path and share and lead others.
Oprah Winfrey - finding her own path and sharing and helping others.

Looks like its about finding self-values and walk its own path. And this path includes leading others.

South Nodes in Scorpio
They need to be aware of the emotional states of others. If the other person seems upset or distant, remind them to ASK what's going on rather than assuming they know what's wrong.

These natives have to be almost forced to "give", in terms of paying attention to others. As a result, the other person may start distancing themselves because the flow of energy isn't reciprocal. Their hearts close when they feel unseen and unappreciated. Then the sensual pleasure and open affection, so important to the native, begins to leave the relationship.
The natives need to move beyond their own self-focus and give the other person understanding, validation, approval and wholehearted support as a tangible demonstration of their partner's worth in the relationship.

Soul
Yea. I tend to focus on myself. Making sure Z knows of my parameters but I seldom asked about him. Whereas he always asked me what I like or dislike.

South Nodes in Scorpio
In the initial stage, they should not verbalise too much about their values and needs, but rather to probe and listen and gain an understanding of the other person's psychology - and their motives. Then they will be able to see if the other person's values and needs are compatible with theirs, and if they want to grow closer to them.

Soul
Yea. Whenever Z asked me if I wanted commitment, I evade the question and didn't ask him his reason. Little did I knew it was because he was on fact finding mission and just wanted to be sure that I can have a long term fling with him.

South Node in Scorpio
They are stubborn. Their first response to a new idea - to change - is "No". However, this can make their life pretty boring and they know it.
When approaching them with an important idea, choose an environment they are comfortable in and touch them (take their hand, put ur hand on their arm or rub their shoulders) while presenting ur ideas. Keep talking until they can really feel where u r coming from.
The sensual connection - touch, a comfortable restaurant with good food - will help them relax and be more open.

Soul
Yea, I really admit this.

South Node in Scorpio
These natives get so rigid - they are afraid to step out of their isolating self-sufficiency. At times they need to put their personal needs on the back burner and experiment with investing their full power for a set period into another person or project that inspires them to see the results.

Soul
I know. That's why this time I am discussing with Z our exit plan. If its up to me, I would end it asap. But I knew my Pluto challenge and so I want him to have a say and we plan for it together. Also, I wanted him to
be aware of my feelings for him.

South Nodes in Scorpio
These natives value loyalty, dependability and trustworthiness.

Soul
In a relationship I valued the above. One of the main attraction about Z is that he is all that in a committed relationship.

South Node in Scorpio
To rid themselves of the stagnancy of patterning resulting from past lives, these natives need to make choices that lead to personal transformation, growth and expansion beyond their current limits.
In order to do this successfully, they need a partner - someone they can support, bond with and work toward a joint goal with in a situation of mutual empowerment. Embracing this kind of transformation is their personal key to fulfilling their destiny. It's scary, but there's no other way.
For these natives, the vital energy of transformation is a barometer that they are "on track."

Soul
I know and that's why my life time challenge is Seven of Hearts.

South Node in Scorpio
Habits to discourage
1. Stubborn resistance.
2. Invalidating others
3. Pre-occupation with their own needs

South Node in Leo
Support them having fun
Always ask them,"Are u still having fun with this?" If the answer is yes, encourage them, because they're on track. If their answer is no, suggest that they stop and reevaluate. If they are not having fun, they"re "off path'.
So cheer them on in pursuing activities that make them happy. Help them to get in touch with what they would like to have happen and what would make them happy.
When they are involved in activities that allow them to experience personal pleasure, they are fanning the fire of their joyful emotional body and opening their hearts.
Encourage them to play - to bring out the joy and the playful spirit of their inner child - and when they are playing and having fun, validate them.

(Dec 3 - Z said he learns to 'enjoy' when he is with me. Just to relax and enjoy and don't have to do anything.

Soul
I am self focused and Z is people focused.
I think people is to make me happy and Z think he is to make the people happy.
I am focus on self acceptance and Z is focused on people acceptance.
I am focused on internal and Z is focused on external.
I always go for what make me happy and Z goes for what makes others happy.

My gift to Z - be aware of urself, be independent, have courage to be happy.
Z's gift to me - be aware of people's value and needs, be open to commitment.

He has given me an experience of a healthy, synergistic bond with another.