Mar 27 Eve
Father, yday morning I didn't want to bring my black shawl as I don't want to lose it in my outstation trip. Then it was cold and I offer it to my mom. Alas, now it is lost. I am not sure if its my intuition or my wish. (May 17 - I got it back)
Can see my mind acting overtime. Why Z never call u? Why must u always spend the night? Why can't u have a normal date? Why do u still continue?
My answer. Actually we do have a date. Most of the time we spend time sharing our issues facing us, we shared the things that is important to us. We left the date looking forward towards next date. Its true we spend the night but we have loads of sharing. Anyway, I just ignored my mind and text him.
(May 17 - our sleep-over date is actually even more intimate than a normal date. One time sleep-over equals to at least 3 dates or more..mmmmm, I am positive today. From now onward, I will be positive. No one can help me up except myself. My mind will continue to judge and pull me down and only I can help myself up. Even now mind says that if i pulled myself up, the fall will be deeper. Well, I don't care. I need to elongate my threshold and I am no longer afraid of being hurt as my meditation helps me to stay focus and joy will forever be there, erupting any moment. Yeah, woh...those 'affairs' never include sleep over...We had more going for us than I realised. I was too focus on what we don't have instead of what we have.)
No reply for 5 minutes and mind acting again. Why so stupid? Why u text him? Why show u like him??? This is a short term thingy.
Father, guide me through. He replied my text. Then we chat a bit and he told me he hasn't had dinner. Of course as usual, when he want to hang up amicably, he said he would call me back. So far, it has not happen before. Hei, it did for some critical time. For today, he spent whole day with family and he is in downtime mode. So, I don't expect him to call me back. I don't want to set myself up for disappointment. Reading his card, he always have upper hand. Wait, mind's tots again.
Osho - Kabir
God is the breath inside the breath.
Watch ur breath and u will come to know what he means.
Your thoughts process and ur breathing are very deeply related.
Your breathing goes on changing with the moods of the mind. The vice versa is also true: when the breath changes, the moods of the mind change and when breath stops, mind stops.
In the stopping of the mind, the whole world stops because the mind is the world. And in that stopping you come to know for the first time what is breath inside the breath.
Remember if u respect life, u should not allow any death to settle in u, u should not allow any fear to settle in u.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment